Merry Christmas, Little Mouse

 At the sound of the doorbell, Rose brushed the cookie crumbs from her skirt with shaking hands before hurrying to receive her guests. “Welcome!” She said cheerfully, successfully masking her anxiety from the group of women standing before her. “Please, come in and get comfortable! I'm Rose, as most of you already know, thank you so much for coming!” Though she hadn't intended to, Rose locked eyes with one of the women, Sadie, almost instantly. She froze for just a moment before regaining her composure but was confident no one noticed her odd reaction.

“I'm so excited to host this year's Christmas cookie exchange,” she continued, “and even though we're the new kids in town, I'm more than aware of the importance of this time-honored tradition.” Rose had had to do a lot of sucking up to gain the honor- a LOT- but would have done more if she had to. “I promise I won't let you down! Please follow me to the kitchen and I'll show you what I mean...”

Rose led the women down the hall and into the kitchen, which smelled like Christmas itself, thanks to the perfectly timed baking of Snickerdoodles and the Wassail that was still simmering on the stove. “Why don't we set the cookies out across the countertop,” Rose suggested and smiled at her guests while praying that her heartbeat would slow and her hands cease their shaking. She was more than desperate to impress these women, well, not so much all of them as one: Sadie Miller. The women went to work assembling their cookies onto the trays that Rose had set out. Once they were finished, they moved from one tray to the next, piling samples of each cookie onto their plates.

“Let's bring them outside, I had my husband set up heaters so we could have our own little winter wonderland,” she said, the women seemed to love the idea. Rose had planned the event tirelessly, rehearsing every step- down to the very words she spoke- but found herself completely overcome with panic as she once again found her eyes settling on Sadie. She spun around towards the back door, taking the opportunity with her back to the women, to get herself together.

She led her guests towards the outdoor dining area, adorned with Christmas decorations, lights, and garland. The scene was made complete with Christmas music playing through speakers. As they made their way to the table, Rose's mind wandered to a memory from long, long ago.

“Get back in the house!” Rose's father hollered at her mother, who stood in front of Rose and her sister in an attempt to protect them from his drunken wrath.

“Go sleep it off, John!” Her mother screamed with all the strength she could muster. The two small girls, shaking from head to toe, held onto each other as they cowered behind their mother. They did their best to muffle their sobs, having learned that the sound only served to infuriate their father further from previous beatings. Rose, the eldest, started to whisper into her sister's ear, not speaking words but a cherished lullaby, in an attempt to calm her. She then pulled her sister back as her father charged her mother and the two started to wrestle. When her mother was thrown to the ground, her head coming down hard on the concrete slab patio, Rose led her sister back into the old, rundown shack they called home.

Leaving the door ajar behind them, they ran through the kitchen, past the small den where their artificial Christmas tree sat bare without a single present, as it would remain until their father returned it to its box for next year. The sisters didn't give the tree a passing glance as they ran by, keeping up their fast pace until they reached the bathroom, the only room in the house that their father hadn't disabled the lock. They hid in the bathtub and remained crouched there together for at least an hour as their father pounded on the door, screaming for them to let him in until he finally grew tired and wandered off to his bedroom to pass out. Then, and only then, did they go out and check on their mother, who was lying unconscious on the patio.

Rose shook her head and was brought back to reality. “Let's take a seat and dive into these delicious cookies, shall we?” she asked and waited until each woman was in place before taking her seat. Okay, here goes nothing...

“Sadie, I feel like we haven't gotten to talk very much, I'm so happy you were able to make it today.” She finally addressed the woman who'd taken the seat directly across the table from her.

Sadie smiled shyly before offering a reply, “Thanks, I'm happy to be invited.” She fidgeted with her hair in a manner that felt very familiar. Rose then moved her attention to the other women before coming back to Sadie.

“Have you always lived in Bellevue?” Rose asked, studying Sadie's beautifully defined features as she waited for her answer.

“No, but I've been here a long time. I'd say at least twenty years,” Sadie replied. Hmm...twenty years, that's just what I thought you'd say, Rose thought.

“What about you, Rose? Where do you hail from?” Ana, another one of the guests, asked.

“We've just moved from Colorado. It was our fourth move in two years if you can believe it. Albert, my husband, is always relocating for work. He loves it. Me and the kids, not so much.” Rose made a face and the women laughed. “We really like it here though.” Rose turned back to Sadie.

“Sadie, I heard you're a writer, is that right?” Rose watched as Sadie shifted uncomfortably, it was clear she didn't like being the center of attention. That's going to make this a bit more difficult...

“Yep, you heard right,” Sadie started, “I mainly work freelance, writing articles for different publications, but I also organize the school's newsletter each month. More notably, I've written a series of children's books that have been relatively popular called The Mouse Diaries, I don't know if you've heard of them.” Sadie perked up a bit as she discussed her work. Rose hoped it was a turning point.

“My girls love them. I do too, actually. I can't wait to tell them the author was in our home.” It was true, her two daughters had the complete set- special signed editions- sitting on their bookshelf right now. Sadie smiled appreciatively but said nothing.

Rose begrudgingly redirected her focus to the other women at the table. As they started pressing Betsy, the reigning cookie queen, to share the secrets of her coveted Almond Spritz cookie recipe, her mind wandered once again.

“Mommy, let's just go!” Rose pleaded in the too-early morning, “why do we stay when Daddy hurts us?” She was too young to understand and her Mother didn't try to explain.

“Shhhhhh!” her mother urged as she placed an ice pack on Rose's shoulder, “you'll wake him.” Rose's shoulder was just one of many injuries from last night's assault. Her father's fit of rage had led him to hurt all three of them. His abuse was growing increasingly violent and the incidents closer together. Even little Rose knew that something needed to happen but, at only 10 years old, she lacked the resources to free herself, let alone her mother and sister too. She required the help of a grown-up, but the only one who could, her mother, seemed resigned to stay.

Her sister, asleep in the bed next to them, was still holding fast to her favorite toy, a doll that their late grandmother had given her. Rose could see bruises on her sister's wrists where her father had handled her. Rose felt sick to her stomach as she replayed the scene in her mind, her father grabbing her sister's wrists tightly before lifting her off the ground and tossing her tiny body onto the floor in their bedroom. He then slammed the door shut, leaving her to writhe in pain all alone. Rose would have jumped in front of him to protect her, she always protected her sister, but this time she'd been unable to move quickly enough. He'd shoved her and she fell back into the kitchen door so hard that her shoulder broke right through it. She'd had trouble freeing herself and that is when she failed her sister. She knew it wouldn't be the last time if she didn't do anything.

Rose's growing fear fueled her determination as she jutted her chin forward and screamed at her mother, “no! I want us to leave NOW,” while holding the naive hope that it would somehow convince her to finally take the words seriously. Her mother's face dropped in horror as they heard a loud crash come from somewhere inside the house. Her father was awake. “Let's go, Mommy! Let's sneak out the window and never come back!” Her mother appeared to be on board with the idea as she opened the girl's first story window and woke up her youngest daughter. She helped them out the window, one after the other, but instead of following them out, she closed it behind them. Rose was about to call for her mother to follow but saw that her father had already made his way into the bedroom. She grabbed her sister's hand and they ran into the small patch of woods behind their house, only returning when the sky grew dark and their stomachs were grumbling for dinner.

They cautiously returned to their house, the only one on the street without Christmas decorations, and saw that two police cars and an ambulance were parked out front. Their father was locked in the back of one of the police cars while, unbeknownst to them, their mother was on the brink of death in the ambulance. The girls ran over and identified themselves to one of the police officers who told them their father wouldn't be able to hurt them anymore. The news brought tears of joy to young Rose's eyes. She had no idea that her life was about to change in a way that she never could have imagined.

The cookie exchange was winding down and Rose led the women back to the kitchen. They divided the leftover cookies into treat bags which the women declared were the cutest they had ever seen. Rose had kept her promise, she didn't disappoint. As they filled their bags, Rose made several additional attempts to draw Sadie out of her shell but she seemed to retreat further every time. In turn, Rose grew more desperate.

As the guests started filing out, Rose staged one last attempt at conversation with Sadie so she would stay behind and they could be alone. It worked, but not for long. Soon Sadie moved towards the door to leave and Rose found that she couldn't let her go.

“WAIT!” She called out. Sadie turned to stare at Rose in shock. “I'm sorry, I just really wanted to tell you something...” Rose wracked her brain for the best way to bring up the very sensitive subject that had led to her host the cookie exchange in the first place. Somehow, in all of her planning, she had neglected to map out the most important part. The idea she came up with wasn't a great one but was all she could think of. “I have an idea for a new Mouse Diaries book and I had my heart set on sharing it with you today. I'm sure you get this all the time, but it'd mean so much to me and would only take a minute, please?” Rose begged. Luckily Sadie agreed, though her discomfort was obvious.

All right, Rose, this is it, the moment you've been waiting twenty years for...She took a deep, grounding breath before starting but her words still came out rushed, “I was thinking the reader could find out that the father mouse is nothing more than an abusive drunk, and after he almost kills their mother, the two sister mice are placed with families that live across the country from one another. Ten years pass before the eldest sister starts a search for her younger sister. It takes her another ten to find her,” Rose fought back the tears that were threatening to fall, “only when she does, her little sister doesn't recognize her. That is until she sings the song that their grandmother used to sing them to sleep once upon a time,” she noticed a flicker of emotion in Sadie's eyes, “one that went like this: Little mouse, little mouse, so sweet and so small...”

Sadie gasped as the realization of who was standing in front of her stole the breath from her lungs. Tears flowed freely as the two embraced. “I found you, little sister. I finally found you.” Rose whispered. The two sisters held each other for a long time before turning away from the door and walking into the sitting room, hand in hand. They had a lifetime of catching up to do.