Between life and Shadow

Lorin has never really thought about his death, or what might come after. He’d enjoyed his life, born the only son of a Faerie doctor on earth he had been surrounded by magic from his first moments. It made life easier for him. While he never really had a control magic there was always just a faint trace there, just a golden cloud of magic that existed everywhere. Lorin knew that if he was kind to it, it might just help him in little ways. Cushioning his falls when he tripped, giving him a sparkling trail to follow whenever he got lost. It would hover over the correct options when he needed to make a choice.

He’d spent his life preparing to take over for his father and he’d been content with that, happy even. Then things had changed. He’d made a friend, and she’d brought the magic around him even more to life and he’d followed her on an adventure that he had never thought possible before. It made him hunger for more. He wanted to go out and see all of the worlds that he hadn’t even begun to understand. He wanted to see the magic in action in everyday life.

It is likely that that wish, that nearly desperate longing for more, was why he was still here now—trapped as a specter between life and death. He remembers his death. He remembers the sheer panic as he scrambled through the clash of bodies. They had practically stumbled upon the battle, an accident, and despite their mission, it had been impossible to ignore the pleas for help from the village. The gnomes were peaceful creatures. They wanted nothing more than to live off the land. But the dark forests of the Unseelie had been spreading its borders. The Redcaps that made their home there grew greedy. Already the Gnomes had been driven from their ancestral homes and forced to start anew. Now it was happening again.

So Lorin and his companions had vowed to help them. It shouldn’t have been hard. They had Blyte and Neas, two well-trained warriors, and Davi whose plant magic thrived in the wild, even the changing child Merritt with his unpredictable bursts of light and shadows should have given them the advantage. Lorin had been trained since birth to be a doctor to the fae. He’d offered his services as well in the hopes of making himself useful. But then the fighting had begun and he’d been drawn from the makeshift infirmary by that familiar golden light. One minute everything had been going in their favor and then the next somehow the Redcaps were dragging Thea and Merritt from their hiding spot. Things blur in Lorin’s memories after that moment. But he remembers that trail of gold, so prominent, brighter than he’d ever seen it before and he’d known that the choice he made was the only one he could.

He doesn’t know how much longer after that it was that he came back to his senses. But his body was gone. Burned in a proper fae funeral. He doesn’t know how he knows that but he feels a sense of ease when he thinks about his body. Now all that is left of him is his spirit. He’d drifted at first with no real direction. Getting a feel for the freedom of no longer being bound to his body. But then the golden magic had come once again and he had followed it. Followed it on and on across the island until he’d once again came across his former companions gathered around a warm fire as they had so many nights before. He had been hurt at first, hurt that his death seemed to have little effect on them as they sat there, chatting and teasing and joyful. As though his loss meant nothing. He had felt that hurt like a physical thing in his chest and it seemed to weigh him down, to make the world around him darker. But then he had rested to Thea’s left, the spot that had always seemed to be open for him in their travels, and somehow despite the tentative smile on her face he had felt her grief pouring off her in waves. It had been powerful enough to cause him to weep though tears could no longer fall from his eyes and somehow he knew that the sobs that wracked his chest and left him gasping for the air he could no longer breathe were hers. Her grief was so strong it affected him even in this in-between state.

With Thea’s grief still weighing him down he decided that his best course of action was to continue to monitor his friends and the golden magic never made another appearance to tell him otherwise so he floated along beside them as they crossed the land and soon he almost forgot that he was no longer really a physical presence with them. He sat around the fire each night and he laughed at Blyte’s ridiculous stories and he clapped as Merritt showed off the new magic he learned along the way. He closed his eyes when the fire got low and Neas’ sweet voice lulled them to sleep as she took the first watch each night.

Things were not easy for his friends as they went. It seemed every force in this world was conspiring against them and again and again they found obstacles in the way of their mission and Lorin wished desperately that they could hear him. That he could assist his friends. The closer they got to their goal the more dangers that lurked around them. They were so close, so close to being done with this dangerous adventure. Then Thea would be able to go home, be able to return to the human world with the brother that had been stolen from her and Lorin hoped and he prayed to the gods that he had never really believed in that he would be able to go with her. That he would be able to return to the cluttered house and the thriving gardens that had always been his place of comfort. That he would be able to see his mother and his father and he would be able to know that they longed for him as much as he longed for them. He wondered what they would think of his disappearance. He’d gone off on his own without so much as a warning to come here to the fae lands to chase after Thea. He regrets that now.

Time begins to lose its meaning as he follows the group. He knows that days and nights pass but they stop making sense to him. What need does he have to track time when he has all of eternity spread out before him? Eventually, his friends complete their mission. They reach the king of the Unseelie court and they offer his changeling son back to him in an attempt to retrieve Thea’s brother but the king surprises them with a tale of a forbidden love and a child who’s looks and magic exile him from both his parent’s homes. He offers them a deal in exchange for Merritt’s safety. A glamour to trick their human parents and a promise of riches. Thea will take both of the children home with her to the human realm. Merritt and Victory will grow side by side as brothers until the time comes that it is safe for Merritt to return.

Lorin watches this all unfold, floating weightless in the air. He feels the ever-familiar tug deep within him and his eyes graze over his surroundings until they fall upon his gold magic but something darker. A stream of shadows that seem to seep from the ground swallowing up the golden magic and creeping closer and closer towards him.

“Oh gods what is that?” Lorin asks though he knows that no one can hear him. “Get away from me!” The only black shadows seem almost alive. He tries to flee but the magic has ahold of him and he is left helpless as the shadows latch onto his leg. Climbing up his skin and some how he can feel it. Really feel it. The oil like substance burrowing inside him. Swallowing him whole. He cries out for his friends, for his parents, for anyone. Anyone to save him. His whole world goes black and then there is nothing.