The Repeating Resolution

Sandra made her New Year’s resolution every single year. She always made the same one, had for the past ten years. The problem, however, was that no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t seem to keep it.

         She knew that millions of people made the same resolution that she did – to lose weight. She also knew that the majority of people failed to keep their resolutions – especially that one. This did not in any way make her feel better.

         When she had made her resolution for the first time, she fully intended to keep it. She wanted to lose thirty pounds. She made herself a rigid workout schedule that included going to the gym, walking the neighborhood, and working out to exercise dvds at home. 

         She was doing really well with it, too, and had lost five pounds when March rolled around and she became pregnant for her first child. Naturally, between work, keeping up the house, and being pregnant, her workout routine sort of fell by the wayside.

         The following year, she had a toddler underfoot. She fully intended to continue the walks around the neighborhood. She would buckle the baby into the stroller and head out for her walks. Unfortunately, the weather was very bad that year. There was lots of rain and sleet and extremely cold weather. This did not allow for outside walks, especially with a one-year-old. By the time the weather straightened up, she was expecting again.

         The third year, Sandra was determined that nothing would hold her back. She had left her job in order to care for her two children, and her husband had agreed to a part-time nanny so that she could go to the gym at least three times a week. 

         Sandra re-joined the gym and hit it head on. She looked forward to, and enjoyed, her workouts. Not only was she working on her health, but it gave her a brief break from the pressures of home. As always seems to be the case, however, something happened to impede her workouts. She ended up tearing a ligament, and by the time it was healed up, she was in a routine at home and never could seem to get back to the gym.

         Years four and five found her once more expecting new babies. Sandra now had been attempting to lose weight for five years, and had only succeeded in having four children and gaining fifty pounds. She felt sluggish and heavy and her lack of energy prevented her from doing much more than what was required of her.

         Sandra began the sixth year determined to lose those fifty pounds. She once more hired a part-time nanny. This time, she decided she would do her walks instead of joining a gym, however, because money was tight and she was afraid of sustaining another injury on the equipment. This went well for about four months. She had lost twenty pounds and was feeling pretty good about herself. Then her mother became ill. Sandra gave up her walks in lieu of going to her mother’s to take care of her and her house.

         The beginning of the seventh year found her burying her mother and having to clean out her mother’s home. Between the work and the grief, she didn’t have much time to work out. Sandra’s parents had been divorced, but her father still took her mother’s death hard and she ended up having to move him in with her family. Now she had four kids, a house, a husband, and her dad to look after.

         Year eight rolled around, and although she didn’t have much faith in it happening, she once more made the same resolution. Since her mother’s death, she had regained the twenty pounds, and put on fifteen more. She felt miserable all the time. She finally went to the doctor, who only told her to lose weight. 

         On the ninth year, her husband agreed to try and lose weight with her. Sandra changed the way they ate, and she and her husband bought two treadmills so that they could workout at home together. This worked out wonderfully for about six months. At that point, her husband began making it a competition. He bragged about all the weight he was losing and the muscle he was building and wanted to know why it wasn’t working out that well for her. He even began to accuse her of cheating on their new eating habits. This made Sandra feel horrible. She already still wasn’t feeling well physically, but now she felt terrible mentally, as well.

         Eventually, she gave up on the workouts with her husband. He didn’t stop. He continued not only to work out, but to brag. They fought a lot and Sandra turned to junk food in secret to stifle her emotions. Finally, when her husband realized that he was hurting his wife, he stopped the bragging and the working out. This was October. Of course, Sandra made the big holiday dinners for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Also, there was all that candy from Halloween. Neither of them kept off the weight. 

         As the tenth year rolled around, Sandra wondered why she should even bother making her resolution. Her husband honestly wondered the same thing, and asked her about it. She decided that this would be the absolute last year that she made this resolution. She now had about one hundred pounds that she wanted to lose, and she made a vow that if she didn’t lose it this year, she would give up on that resolution once and for all.

         January came around, and Sandra once again committed to her workouts. She walked on her treadmill every morning. She did her exercise dvds every afternoon. Although she didn’t follow any special diet, she did try to eat healthier. Her father passed away in March. This once again stopped her workouts.

         However, by the time May rolled around, her husband was concerned. He asked her to stop or at least slow down the workouts. She told him that she hadn’t worked out in two months. The odd thing was that she had lost fifty pounds.

         By June, she had lost eighty. Everyone told her how great she was looking and wanted to know her secret. She didn’t have one. The weight was just falling off. She went for her routine visit to her doctor, who also complemented her on her weight loss, and wanted to know how it had happened. 

         Sandra explained, and the doctor ran some tests. When she received her test results, she thought that cancer was sure one hell of a way to lose weight and keep a resolution.