WHERE THE WILD THINGS AREN’T
“Tell me again about this night terror of yours, Aidan …How do you describe it? “
“It’s simple. It’s real simple, doc. I just can’t look under the bed, never, not after the sun goes down. “
“Because there is a monster there? You know that is a very childish fear. And you are 30 years old now. That makes you a grown-up.”
“You don’t have to remind me, doc. You are the only one I can talk to. The only one who will listen.”
“Well, okay, let’s talk about it. Again. Tell me what you think is under the bed?”
“Well, there’s nothing now. You know why? Because for one thing, it is daytime. And for another thing, I have a futon now. On a trial basis. It isn’t so great for my back, but at least I know nothing is under THIS bed. It’s a whole lot better than the alternative!”
“And the alternative is?”
“The alternative is me lying awake all night, wondering what is under the bed after dark and when it will come out again!”
“Come out and do what?”
“Come out and get me. I don’t know. Whatever monsters do to their victims.”
“You know, Aidan, we’ve been meeting for over a year now and I don’t know if we’ve made any real progress. Are you still sleeping with the lights on?”
“No, because I’m sleeping on the futon and nothing can hide underneath it. But if I go back…”
“Back to the better bed? And only then will the lights go back on, right? I don’t know how you manage to get any sleep at all. “
“Well, I did try some of the things you mentioned last time. The meditation music, the yoga breathing, the chamomile tea. But I can’t use the sleeping mask because then I would be back in the dark.”
“And?”
“And, I’m afraid again. None of those things make me less afraid.””
Alright, Aidan. Let’s start over. I agree that you need to go back to your old bed. This new bed isn’t coming to grips with the mental problem and it’s creating another physical problem for you. Let’s think about what’s under the bed rationally. When you feel that old fear arising, what do you imagine is under the bed?”
“I’m not sure. But I know I won’t like it. And if it knows that I know it is there, it will…”
“It will do what?”
“It will lie in wait for the moment I fall asleep and….attack me”.
“So you have never bent down and actually looked under the bed at night?”
“It gives me the shivers to even think about that. I almost did it once when I was a little kid, but I stopped and ran out of the room screaming.”
“Aidan, listen to yourself. Have you ever woken up with scratches or bruises, claw marks, anything like that? “
“No, not injuries exactly. But I have woken up the when the pillows were on the floor and sheets up in a ball like an animal, a monster, some kind of creature, had walked across my bed in the middle of the night. “
“When you say ‘monster’, do you mean like a tiger or a ghost or a zombie or what? It sounds to me like you might be reading too much science fiction or watching too many horror movies!”
“Yes. maybe something like a tiger, maybe something worse…it is something that only comes out after dark. Something that likes to hide and plot. I think I’ve heard it growl.”
“And where does this monster go during the day? Do you look under the bed in the daytime?”
“Yes, of course. It goes back to its, I don’t know, its lair during the day. Or maybe it is invisible during the day.”
“You mean, Like Dracula in his coffin?”
“I know you are making fun of me, doc, But if there is nothing there, why is my heart pounding when I get into bed every night? In fact my heart is pounding right now when I just think about it.”
“If this monster wants to do you harm, why hasn’t it dismembered you or carried you off to its lair already, Aidan? It’s been tormenting you for years now. Do you think perhaps it is all in your mind?”
“I wish you hadn’t mentioned Dracula. Did he growl? I think, no, I know I’ve heard it growl, And no, it is something supernatural so it is hard to explain. It doesn’t do things like the rest of us. It is here to cause fear. “
“Aidan. I have an idea. Why don’t you draw a picture of what you think this terrifying supernatural growling beast that you have never seen looks like? Then we will know what we are talking about. “
“Ok, I am no artist but give me that pad and pen. I’ll try to show you what I think it looks like. Give me a minute. “
“Yes, now this is something concrete. Maybe this will tell us something. Give us some clues.”
“Let me see what you’ve got there. Hope I won’t be scared. Ah, so this is what is under your bed every night? This is the monster? “
“Sort of, But much much bigger …and scarier. I don’t know how to draw scary. “
“ Aidan, you know we might finally be on to something. This monster under the bed seems to have a tail and are those ears…? And fur?”
“Yes, fur all over its body….and claws…and whiskers….”
“Aidan, I think I know who your nighttime monster is….and I think we should put down a saucer of milk for it tonight! That should make it growl, or rather… purr. “
“What do you mean?”
“Look at your picture, Aidan…. What do you see? Anyone you know? “
“It’…s it’s “
“Say it, Aidan!”
“It’s Elmer, my cat.”
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Draw me a picture of this monster.
Okay. I can’t draw very well, I’m no artist but I’ll try.
It makes me scared just to think about it but I’ll try to draw what I know is under here.
Your hand is shaking.
See you don’t believe me, doc. Haven’t you ever been afraid of monsters…after dark?
Not after the age of seven, no.
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1 comment
Perhaps either in the lead up to, or during the therapy session the root of your fear could have been introduced. The session was detailed though and appeared to come from experience. Pacing was good and the realistic dialogue kept me reading to see what the outcome would be. All in though , a very detailed discussion between patient and therapist about a common childhood fear.
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