Hello, Mama.

Light. Piercing, white light, blinding. My eyes flutter open, taking in the world. My wings beat back and forth, but I stay on the ground. I am a bird. This I know. I have wings, but they don't work right now. I am in this green plant, hiding from the bright, and the predators. I do not know what exists out there. I need worms if I am to survive, but I have found no worms. No mother to bring them to me, or to chew them up. I have a vague memory of my mother feeding me worms, a few days ago, but now she's gone. A predator may have gotten her. She wouldn't leave me. Maybe she's searching for me right now. Not maybe, she is. 

A large being, with big eyes, long hair, and a soft voice comes to me. She watches from a distance, afraid of me, as she should be. I am weak, but I can be strong. I can peck. I can eat her, if need be. Just need mama to chew her up first. Maybe I can fly now. My wings flutter, but my body doesn't move. I saw mama fly once, so I should be able to too, unless there's something wrong with me. There might be. That's what it feels like. The big bright moves, and shines on me. I cannot get out of the big bright, it takes up all the space near me, trying to beat me down. But nobody beats me down. Not the big bright, not the large being, who's creeping closer towards me now, holding something. 

No! Back away. Oh, the big bright is gone. The girl placed something to shield me from it. Perhaps this is all a trick, for her to find my mama too, if mama is still alive. It's a trap to lure mama here. 

She walks away, and goes into the large structure next to the bush I've known my whole life. She returns, holding something red. Food? I peck at it, but cannot chew. Too sweet. And seeds in it. She takes it away, and comes back with something bright, and a little cold. It is hard when she picks me up with it, and for a moment I think it is my wings finally working, but I don't feel the strain of my wings fluttering, and I'm not sure when the last time I tried to beat them was. Will they still beat?

I'm now high above the ground, like mama was when she disappeared, but my butt is on something hard. She places me into a box. I can't see anything but brown walls. It is soft though, and comfortable. If I lay here long enough I could sleep. Every waking moment feels like I could sleep, but this is my first time being able to, peacefully. I feel safe in this box, so I'll sleep. 

I awake, and it is dark. I hear other chirps, from birds stronger than me. I cannot make a sound like them. Oh, how it would be lovely to chirp, and hear their chirps, and be with mama. Where is the girl? My new mama. She looks after me, and protects me. Could it be a trap?

If it is, I'm not sure if I could peck her away. I can barely move now, my mouth only opens slowly, and I have a pain inside. A pain which subsides every now and then, but comes back stronger. Can new mama fix me?

Is new mama my real mama? Perhaps I am not bird, I am girl. She protects me, and tries to feed me, even if it doesn't work. Maybe one day I'll grow big as her, and traverse this structure, and be under big bright for hours as she, laying there. She looks at peace then. Not with me though. Around me, new mama looks worried. 

I am on hard shiny thing again, new Mama snuck up behind me. She’s carrying me somewhere. I'm not sure where, but I'm up for adventure. She puts me down on the dirt, on a hard wooden chip, but it feels nice to be one with the earth. There are bugs skittering around me. Some with two legs, some with eight. I lay here, watching them. I cannot eat them because no energy. Even if I did eat, I don't know what would happen. If they would go down, or skitter inside me. I feel something skittering inside me right now. Not sure what, but it causes pain. 

New mama gets up and leaves me alone. I focus on breathing, because that is hard right now. I focus on it for however long new mama is gone for. I see her feet, the same size as me. Hello! Excited! She has something in her hand. Something with a hole at the top, and it is round. She places down in front of me. Does she want me to go in there? I can not jump that high, nor fly. Then she lays it on the floor, facing me, and worms inside crawl out. Food! 

But not food. They crawl, unaware I could eat them. Excited, but not excited enough to make me move.

New mama looks worried, and angry, and leaves. The bucket stays where she put it, but I’m still on the chip. 

My purpose is to survive. But right now, I wouldn't mind if it changed. If I became one with the earth again. Maybe worms get turn to eat me.

I hope to see mama again. Maybe she's one with the light. New mama didn't have to do anything she did for me, whereas mama had to, because that is what Mamas do. 

What is purpose without mama?

I don't know if mama is coming back, but new mama is good too. I think I'm finally feeling that peace she feels under the big bright, but there's no big bright now, only crescent little bright. 

I'll close my eyes, and see new mama tomorrow. We can go on another adventure. She won't have to worry anymore. 

Light. Piercing, white light, blinding. My eyes flutter open. My wings beat back and forth, and I go up into the sky. 

Hello, Mama.