Well Beyond The Fence

"I'm gonna take a freight train

Down at the station, Lord

I don't care where it goes

Gonna climb a mountain

The highest mountain

I'll jump off, nobody gonna know”

- The Marshall Tucker Band

I'm so angry. I did my best. I really did.

That road from the army base where we live now, running out west towards that looted Costo outlet near Corvallis, is littered with abandoned cars and trucks, all rusting out, tires flat, gas tank lids and caps open. I know all the places where you have to go off-road to get around them, but there are always things you just can’t predict. The Law of Unintended Consequences, they call it. That’s what happened to me, I guess. I became an unintended consequence. I don't know. Maybe that's not right. I'm not thinking very clearly right now.

Molly too. My Staffordshire Terrier. She was an unintended consequence as well, maybe. I guess. I felt worse about her in the end, honestly. I loved Molly so much. Those little fuckers. I hate them so much, and now I am them.

The old Toyota 4-Runner was running pretty smooth despite the degraded quality of the fuel that was left to us, and it only bogged down on me a few times during the drive but never stalled out. When I reached the parking lot, I came to a stop by the loading docks, like always. I grabbed the cut-down Remington 12-gauge and stuffed the box of pumpkin balls into my jacket pocket. Normally I would have left the driver’s side door open, but I had to keep Molly inside. I certainly wasn't bringing her in there.

The rear door to the Costco was still propped open, just like it always is, and I found the battered old orange hand truck sitting right there in the corner, just like it always is. Things looked much as they always did. I couldn’t hear anything, but I still kept the shotgun pointed directly ahead of me as I entered the store floor from the back room. I clicked on the small flashlight mounted to the barrel with some electrical tape and squinted into the darkness.

I waited fifteen seconds, then another fifteen, and then I entered. I left the hand truck right there and proceeded very slowly. It was my turn to do this today and I never argued against it when my turn came, but Kaylie was my only remaining child and I had to get back to her. I was in no big rush. I simply had to do my job and get back. I'm just so angry now. I really messed this up.

I took a can of baked beans off the closest shelf and threw it as far as I could down one of the aisles and then I shuffled back a few steps to see what would happen, listening for the sound of footsteps, ready to run if there were too many.

I heard nothing. I waited fifteen seconds, then another fifteen, and then I moved forward. A short time later I had the first load of supplies stacked up on the hand truck. I left it there and checked the back room again with the flashlight beam on my shotgun and then checked the back parking lot for a moment just to make sure everything was cool out there too. Seeing nothing of concern, I hauled the first load of supplies out and loaded them into the back of the 4-Runner as quietly as possible.

When I returned, I took all of the same precautions. I made no assumptions. But again, everything seemed clear, so I went ahead and gathered up the rest of the supplies. In the end I had canned foods, batteries, bottled water and juice, toilet paper, napkins, Tylenol, garbage bags, t-shirts, vitamins and a few other things. There wasn’t very much left at that Costco by that point, but we didn’t go much further into the more previously populated urban areas until it became truly necessary.

Again, I checked the back room and the parking lot before I hauled the hand truck out through the loading dock door and placed everything in the back of the old Toyota SUV as quietly as possible.

Then I heard the sound of something being knocked over coming through the rear door of the Costco outlet. It sounded metallic. Maybe a bucket or a garbage pail being tipped over, or something like that. I pointed my shotgun in that direction for a second and then jumped into the driver’s seat of the Toyota and drove off. I had what I came for and Molly was barking like crazy.

It would take at least five or six hours, maybe more, to get back to the base and I had already traveled at least that same amount of time just getting there earlier that day. I would definitelty have to refuel from the tanks in the back soon. I was ready to push on through but when it started raining I knew it would take much longer and it would be much more dangerous. I had to rethink my plans.

I knew a place. It was more important that I just got back to Kaylie than getting back right away. I knew she would be scared if I didn’t return that night, but that’s obviously better than not returning at all. My sister Amy would comfort her as much as possible. I wasn’t looking forward to my night either, but Amy would take care of her until I got there with the supplies.

Like I said, I knew a place. It was just past a highway exit sign for Langhorn Avenue. That sign has a red letter X spray-painted across it. Everyone knows what that means.

Just past that exit, along the side of the road just before you reach Redmond, there is a little sleep-spot we sometimes use when we have to. It has proven safe. It used to be a small electrical substation, just a little eight by twelve steel structure, about ten feet tall, that once housed some power transmission equipment. At some point someone gutted it out and you can still see the old components rusting there just outside of the door, the tall grass growing up through the cracks.

I pulled the Toyota around in front of that old substation but I kept the engine running and I stayed inside for a little while and used my binoculars to search the surrounding area for signs of movement. The sky was gray and the sun was setting but I saw nothing of concern so eventually I grabbed the shotgun and my travel bag and got out of the SUV, as cautiously and quietly as possible. I left the driver’s side door open, despite the light rain. I didn't want to make any unnecessary noise and if I needed to make a quick escape that could make the difference.

Once Molly and I were inside that old substation I quickly closed the door behind me and dropped the zip-tie bundled rebar bolts into place. Then I stood there by the door for a while holding my shotgun but I didn’t hear anything outside and eventually I relaxed a bit. They don’t like the rain, but you never really know.

The filthy old mattress was a welcome sight. I sat there as I ate a cold can of Chef Boyardee raviolis. They were so delicious and I took my time. It was a treat. I had dog food and water for Molly too. She was happy as well. Afterwards, I laid my sleeping bag out on the mattress and Molly and I fell asleep to the fading sound of rain pattering off the steel roof. It was nice.

A few hours later, I was awoken by the sound of Molly’s growling and barking. She was standing by the door and I could hear the sounds of screaming and scratching coming from the other side. I grabbed my shotgun and pulled Molly back, breathing heavily, hoping the door would hold. I checked the rebar bolts. The door seemed solid.

After a while the rain picked up, the violent sounds coming from outside faded away and then I set the shotgun down and returned to the bed. It was hard to find sleep again. I stared up into the darkness for a while.

It was just over three years ago when it all began. A facility in the woods of northern Montana where they housed and performed tests on children who had been exposed to experimental biochemical weapons in various locations around the world. Things were fine there, until they were not.

The confused and sometimes conflicting news reports at the time mostly said that there was an antivirus that was administered to those kids on a daily basis, but one day the supplies ran out. Then, by the next morning, that facility was overrun. Blood and gore. The fences went down. But what no one knew until then was that it was contagious. Most people past the age of adolescence quickly succumbed to it, but not everyone. No one really knows why. It all happened very quickly. And then it was all over, and I mean all of it. Everything.

The world is very different now. This part of the world anyway. I really don't know what it's like elsewhere. We don't receive news reports anymore.

I eventually fell asleep and woke up a few hours later with Molly cuddled up by my side. I fed her some kibble for breakfast and then I ate a granola bar and drank a bottle of water and packed up my gear. I looked out through the two small peepholes before leaving the safety of the substation with Molly by my side. The rain had stopped but it was still gray and cloudy.

I guess I made a little too much noise unbolting and opening the door. As soon as we stepped outside I heard the clattering from behind the substation and on the low rooftop overhead. They must have just waited out there all night. I didn’t know they were capable of that. I thought they just retreated back into the woods once they quit the hunt.

Molly paid the price, not me. I hate myself for that. I hate myself.

When they pounced, I fired my shotgun twice and blasted two of them in the chest and put them down. Both teenage boys, stark naked and filthy, with elongated nails and teeth, long straggly hair, moving with predatory speed. Unfortunately, there were three more who fell on Molly. Two adults and a kid. I was about to take another shot but they were all over her - and trust me, she was fighting back like a fucking monster - but I just saw no way to not hit her as well. After a few seconds I realized she would soon be dead anyway so I just unloaded my remaining four shells and killed them all, including Molly. I was so angry, but I started crying right away. I'm still enraged. They made me kill Molly. Those little fuckers.

As I was making my way to the driver side door of the Toyota with my head down and staring at the grass through my tear-blurred vision, that’s when the last one got me. He was just a little kid, maybe ten years old. Perhaps that’s why he held back when the others rushed in. I don’t know. Who can say? Who knows how they think? I guess I will know soon enough. It's already starting.

He came around from the back of the liftgate and dove at me and bit me on my forearm. There was only the one quick bite before I turned around and smashed him in the forehead with the butt of my Remington. But as soon as I got into the 4-Runner and closed the door I could see that he had drawn blood. I wiped it off with my bandana and poured some rubbing alcohol on it. I was scared but I still had some hope. I had my fingers crossed, but I still had some hope.

That hope faded quickly along the drive back to the base. I feel sick now. I feel very sick, and it's just getting worse.

My head is starting to pound and I feel like I might need to vomit. My teeth and gums and my fingernails and toenails are all starting to ache. My vision is changing and my throat is dry. I am starting to make some involuntary growling sounds and I cannot stop gripping the steering wheel with all of the strength in my hands. I want to just get out of the Toyota and run. It doesn't even matter where.

I was planning to just drop off these supplies by the front gates of the base and then leave but it’s still at least a two-hour drive and I am afraid of who, or what, I will be by the time I get there. I think I have to just turn around right now and drive in the opposite direction for as long as I possibly can. I have reloaded the Remington and I am keeping it handy.

I am sweating and drooling pretty hard now. I can't help it. My clothes are also starting to feel extremely uncomfortable. I think I might need to pull over and remove my shirt and boots soon. Maybe my jeans too. I don't think I can take this too much longer. I keep looking at the woods along the side of the road. I just want to run off into the trees. I want to scream. I want to eat something while it is still breathing. Mostly, I just want to end this before it gets worse.

I know that I will never see Kaylie again, and even more than what happened to Molly that’s what makes me feel so sick. I’m sure my sister Amy will take good care of her. But still. I just feel so sick. I keep looking at the woods, and at the Remington.

I just have to keep driving for a little bit longer now. The radio stations all went dark years ago and there's only one stupid old CD stuck inside the dashboard stereo in this Toyota for me to listen to as I drive - The Marshall Tucker Band - so I turn it up. What else am I going to do? The hum of the motor is hurting my head, and the lyrics seem right.

"I'm gonna find me a hole in the wall.

I'm gonna crawl inside and die."

But no. I don't think so. That would be too easy.

I think I'm gonna die with my boots on. And I'm definitely gonna bring some of you little bastards with me. Get ready to eat some of these 12-gauge pumpkin balls. It's not going to be pretty. I'm gonna cut some of you little demons in half while I still can. As many of you as possible, until my ammo runs out. I owe that much to Kaylie and Molly and Amy and all of the others.

I see a red letter X spray-painted on the exit sign up ahead. I'll be there soon. You'll know when I arrive, you little fuckers. Trust me. You'll know.

THE END