The mistake

It had been two weeks, yet Nicolas Baxter hadn’t come out of his house yet. He was still sitting in the living room, curled up in a ball, crying. He didn’t know how to face everyone. They all knew about his mistake, that terrible, unforgivable, unfathomable mistake, and yet, he still could not bring himself to see them at all.

It had all started three weeks ago. His friend Tess saw him at a self-defense class and thought he was pretty good, so she asked him to join her as a spy in an Organization protecting the government. Of course, Nicholas was very eager, so he quickly progressed through his training and got on a mission.

The mission started out well. Nicholas walked into the facility, pretending to be friends with the boss, and was able to quickly get the information he needed. But something went wrong. Really wrong. He was discovered. A man got the drop on him. So Nicolas...well, Nicolas killed him.

He was very shaken after the incident. But he was fine. Mostly disgusted at what he had done. And the blood. Until he started hallucinating . A lot. The man also appeared in his nightmares. Haunting him, scaring him, reminding him of that dreadful thing he did. It was then that he had stopped going outside, seeing friends, going to work, or anything sociable, for that matter, and his friends started being really worried.

Someone knocked on his door. ’Nicky?’ You ok?’ It was his cousin, Dawn. She, like everyone else, had been trying to get him out of the house. She was also coincidentally a spy, and had killed before, so she knew what Nicolas was feeling.

’I’m fine, Dawn. Go away,’ snarled Nicolas. He had no idea why he said that. He wanted her to come in, to reassure him, to talk to him, to tell him that everything would be okay. He really, really did. But every time he thought about that, he saw the man’s face, and how the life drained out of his eyes. Because of Nicolas, a mother had lost her son, a sibling their brother, a man their friend. The man didn’t deserve to die, and the people close to him didn’t deserve to feel pain, so Nicholas didn’t deserve to live.

But the door opened anyway. Dawn came in, her eyebrows furrowed. ’Hey, Nicky,’ said she, with her gentlest voice. ‘are you fine?’

Nicolas did not answer. So Dawn sat down, next to him, and said , ‘Nicky, the man did deserve to die. He tried to kill you! If you didn’t kill him, I would be the one here, sobbing. But that doesn’t matter, If you think you still have to make amends, that’s fine. But Sitting here, crying, is not how you make amends. You need to make amends by helping people, saving people, not sitting in here crying, ok?’

Nicolas stood up. Dawn’s speech, however rough and unprofessional, got to him. He was going to make amends by helping people, and by saving lives, because only then could he really be free from that mistake.

It had been four weeks since he killed the man. Two weeks since he picked himself up, and continued to live his life.

He had been making amends. A lot of them. Both in his normal life and spy life. How?

Well, he had been voluteering at a lot of missions. A lot. The information he got foiled an assasination, stopped an ongoing war, and saved a country. He was very proud of those accomplishments, especially the last one.

But what was more interesting was how he saved people in his day job as a bank accountant. Well, he helped pay off a lot of loans. Anonymously. And by that I mean a lot. One hundred and twelve, to be exact. The people he helped were very happy, and although Nicolas nearly went broke, and although he didn’t get recognition, Nicolas was very happy too.

There was one event that stayed in his mind. A very amazing event involving an old man and his son.

One day, he was working, as usual, when an old man with white hair and black eyes walked in. He went over to where Nicolas was.

‘Hello, Mr Baxter,’ said he, looking at the name tag. ‘Can I get a loan?’

‘Of course, sir,’ said Nicolas, smiling. ‘If I may ask, sir, why? Do you need to buy a new house or something?’

‘No, actually,’ said the man. ‘My son, he’s hurt. In an accident, when he was on his motorbike. Can you lend me some money?’

‘Yes, of course,’ said Nicolas. ‘What’s your name, sir?’

‘Harold. Harold Jones.’ Replied the man.

Later that day, Nicolas went to the nearest hospital and asked if there was someone with the surname Jones there. There was. A Thomas Jones. Who was related to Harold Jones, and was hurt in a horrible accident. So Nicolas went to see him. Jones was hurt, badly. He leg was in a cast and he was unconsious. The doctors said he would die if he did not have surgery immediately. But Jones was still in College, and did not have a part time job, so his father, a retired Construction worker, had to find a way to pay the bills.

So what do you think Nicolas did? He helped by paying the bills. The man, Harold Jones, literally ran into the bank the next day and barely containing his excitement, told the bank manager that he would not be needing the loan anymore, thank you very much. Nicolas smiled to himself, happy to help, but at the same time felt sad, as he had took away a man’s son.

‘Baxter! Wake up! That customer needs you!’ Nicky woke up from his little daydream. He was at work, helping out another customer, and had started thinking about how much he had changed since he killed that man. He had changed, a lot. Everyone could see that as he was happier than ever before. He still knew he shouldn’t have killed the man, but he has progressed from that incident the best possible way, and he would continue to do so.