The Mysterious Vanishing Hole. That was the name the duo had given the thing when they’d begun to chase it fourteen years ago. They had followed it across the four oceans, the seven continents, and one hundred ninety-five countries. And it seemed that once they’d made the decision to cease chasing it, it decided it was time for them to find out the secret.
The duo stood around the edges of the hole, staring into the dark abyss. Over a decade of searching and this is what they find. A tiny opening that showed nothing but darkness.
“We could try and widen the hole,” Matt said with a frown at the child sized hole.
“Last time we touched it, it disappeared on us,” Kristi retorted. “You could jump in and see if that does anything.”
“Why don’t you jump in,” Matt tossed back with a glare. “It’s about your size.”
“I am not kid-sized, Matthew.”
Kristi wound up jumping into the hole. She’d been preparing to get stuck or injured, but as soon as she’d hit the small opening she’d fallen right through. Down and down and down, until she landed on a stone floor many feet below. Dust billowed around her, choking her and sending her into painful coughing fits. It smelled of stale air and rotting wood. And it was dark. So dark that even the light from the hole above -tiny as it was- made no dent.
‘Not creepy at all,’ Kristi thought with a shudder as she squinted in an attempt to see into the darkness. ‘Should have made Matt do it. Then he could be the one dealing with this. Freakin’ hate the dark.’
“Are you dead?” Matt yelled down, voice echoing around her ‘are you dead, you dead, dead, dead…’
‘Am I dead, what the hell, Matt?! Seriously? How could this ki-actually, scratch that I can see how that would be a concern,’ the woman complained in her mind before, out loud calling, “no, I’m not dead! Come down here!”
Her voice echoed just as Matt’s had with her entire sentences and then repeating until it was down to a single word ‘here…’
Thirty minutes later, Matt joined her in the hole. The arse had decided to use a rope to get down instead of just jumping, probably a good idea if they planned to leave the place.
“Halt! Identify Yourself!” a deep voice commanded. There was a sound like armor shifting and the duo could just make out an armored statue shifting in front of them.
“Matt Moglone,” the man said confidently.
“Liar! Identify Yourself!”
“My name is Matt Moglone,” the red head argued, tilting his head to listen to something Kristi muttered before he let out a sigh of annoyance. “Matthew Moglone.”
“LIAR! Identify Yourself!” the voice screamed as the armored statue pulled a sword.
‘What does it want me to say? I already gave it my name! Stupid magical bullshit! This is Kristi’s fault. If she hadn’t wanted to know about this stupid place I could be home. Playing my damned game,’ Matt's thoughts were running wild as he tried to figure out how giving his name wasn’t the correct answer. Finally, he blurted out, “Matthew Joseph Moglone.” And then he threw a hand out to his side. “And this is Kristi Leshea Irby!”
Alright, so he might have been panicking a little because of this magical bullshit. His thoughts reiterated that this was all Kristi’s fault. The duo silently panicked as the voice stayed unerringly silent for a moment. Then they could just make out the figure in front of them reheating the sword and falling into parade rest.
“Matthew Joseph Moglone, Kristi Leshea Irby, Identities Confirmed. Access Granted. Be warned! If you are not out of the Library of the Purple Dragon by nightfall you forfeit your life.”
After the warning, a glow began to spread across the vast room, illuminating an array of statues and paintings and books.
The statues lined the stone walls, while the paintings hung from wires along the stone ceiling. The thing that caught their attention the most though were the books. Wooden shelves that stretched from floor to ceiling were packed together in such a way that it left only enough room for a single person to walk. Every other shelf had a rickety old ladder leaned against it that didn’t look like it would hold a person’s weight, anymore at least.
What bothered the duo the most was the thick layer of dust coating everything, which spoke of no one having been here in a very long time.
“Well, that’s not weird at all,” Kristi muttered with a frown before setting off to investigate things only to be stopped by Matt’s call of “hold on a damned minute.”
Frowning, the woman turned around with a glare and a “we don’t have time to wait. We only have til sundown.”
“And how long until sundown?” Matt asked with a raised brow as he pulled his phone from his pocket.
‘Right. We should probably check that before we separate,’ Kristi thought in annoyance. ‘Shouldn’t have had to have it pointed out.’
Sundown was at 8:41 p.m. that day. So Matt set the alarm for 20:30. It would give them just over ten minutes to get back to the rope and climb out. A good thing because both of them sucked at climbing. They could slide down the rope all day, but climbing up it? Yeah, that was going to take time, which meant…
“We should set it for 8:00,” Kristi suddenly declared, thinking about how hard it was for them to climb. “Just in case.”
Matt shrugged, not caring one way or the other, before changing the alarm to reflect the new time. Now they would have just over forty minutes to get out. Hopefully it will be enough.
Alarm set.
The duo headed deeper into the library, stopping every now and again to admire one of the paintings or the statues. They did find it curious that all of the pieces were those of famous painters and sculptures. Pieces that were on display in museums around the world.
“I’m not the only one that finds this weird, right?” Kristi asked as they stood in front of the Greek hero Perseus holding Medusa’s head. “Isn’t this supposed to be in Italy?”
Kristi clearly recalled it being in a museum there because she’d teased Matt endlessly about never fighting off a giant sea monster for her. And Matt -as he always did- pointed out that he’d have someone else do it for him. The man wasn’t one for fighting if he could help it.
“Bet you love that one though,” the woman pointed out as they moved to the next sculpture. The base read ‘Aphrodite of Knidos.’
“Isn’t that supposed to have been destroyed?”
By this point Matt had pulled out his phone and began to do…something. Kristi wasn’t completely sure.
‘All of this history and he’s playing on his phone,’ the woman thought with a glare before striding off to investigate other pieces of work.
Deeper into the library Kristi was suddenly fairly sure she’d just found the reason for the dire warning. Standing frozen in a giant hoard were purple bananas with legs, arms, and holding all sorts of pointy weapons. A bit odd, in her humble opinion, but not as terrifying as the giant purple dragon sleeping soundly behind them.
Its scales were so dark they nearly blended into the shadows and it was obviously guarding the strange hoard of bananas.
‘We’re screwed,’ was the only thought rushing through the woman’s head as she began to stumble back multiple steps, trying to keep her eye on said dragon and creatures. ‘Are they creatures? Or are they just very real looking statues?’ Kristi’s mind couldn’t help but ask, just as a loud ringing came from somewhere in the distance.
The woman jumped and spun around, looking for the source of the ringing before remembering that Matt had set an alarm to give them time before sundown. ‘Right, just his alarm,’ she muttered in her brain as she began to run towards the sound.
The alarm kept ringing, echoing through the depths of the library. Even when she found Matt the alarm was still ringing. “Turn it off!” she shouted as she grabbed his arm and started trying to drag him after her. “And run!”
Matt fiddled with his phone as Kristi came running from deeper in the library. At first he didn’t pay her any attention because she was obviously ‘concerned about getting stuck in here,’ his mind suggested as he continued to fiddle with the stupid phone. “I am trying to turn it off,” he snapped back. “And stop yelling at me.”
When she grabbed his arm and started tugging Matt started cursing under his breath as he lost his grip on his phone. It hit the stone floor with a worrying ‘crack’ that made the red head glare over at her. “You made me break my phone. You’re buying me a new one.”
“Whatever, just run!” Kristi snarled, still trying to pull him along after her. The phone probably wasn’t in as bad a shape as he thought because the alarm was still going off, but she would happily buy him a new one if he just came on!
The man finally gave in to the pulling on his arm -it was starting to hurt!- and began following at a walk. He didn’t run except in life or death situations and they still had time. Until a loud roar echoed from deep in the library.
“What was that?”
“The reason we need to run!” Kristi shouted, completely fed up with her boyfriend’s bullshit. “There is a giant dragon and a hoard of angry bananas gaining on us and will probably kill us if we don’t run.”
Deciding to question that sentence later Matt broke into a jog. He didn’t run and a semi-fast jog was the best he could accomplish, much to Kristi’s obvious displeasure.
They were half-way back to the entrance when the first spear came flying from behind them, just missing Kristi’s left ankle.
“I thought we had until nightfall,” she grumbled as she sped up, glancing back to see Matt a bit further away than she was happy to see. “Hurry up! We still have to climb that stupid rope!”
It didn’t take them nearly as long as they would have thought to reach the place they’d entered. The rope looked a bit frayed, a bit older and less sturdy than just a bit ago, but neither was going to question it. “Give me a boost,” the woman demanded as she reached her arms up, ready to grab as high up the rope as Matt could lift her.
The red head muttered under his breath as he grabbed the woman by her waist and lifted her a good foot or so higher than she would have been able to reach. Her hands shot out and grabbed the rope, sending it swinging back and forth and nearly causing her to lose her grip.
“Give me a second to get a bit higher before you start,” she demanded as she began to try and climb the rope, leaving her legs dangling because she didn’t know what else to do with them.
She barely managed to get about a foot up the rope on her own before she heard Matt start to curse.
“You didn’t say the dragon shot acid!” Matt shouted, and when she chanced a glance down it was to see her boyfriend dodging spits of neon green acid. “Fuck it. I’m climbing now.”
When Matt grabbed the rope and started trying to pull himself up Kristi clutched tighter, terrifying that the now harshly swinging rope was going to make her fall. ‘Gotta get out,’ she whispered in her mind as she started trying to climb once more. ‘Don’t look down. Don’t think about angry bananas or acid spitting dragons.’
At some point the alarm had stopped ringing and it helped ease something in both adults as they fought to get even a small portion up the rope. It swung violently each time one of them moved and Kristi could hear a strange popping noise. And then she saw the cause of said popping noise. ‘We’re going to die,’ she thought as the rope just above her hand finally snapped.
They went falling back to the stone floor sending clouds of dust into the air and cutting off their breathing for a moment.
“That hurt,” Matt managed to get out through his coughs. “Get off me.”
Kristi found herself on the floor next to him, still staring in shock at the tiny prick of light that was their only way out. “How are we going to get out of he-”
Her question was cut off as a set of arrows came flying over their heads and bounced off the stone wall behind them. “How are we going to defeat that?!” she suddenly shrieked as the hoard of purple bananas and the acid spitting dragon finally caught up with them. “I thought it said nightfall!”
There was no answer for a moment, until the tiny pinprick of light darkened.
“Matthew Joseph Mologone, Kristi Leshea Irby, you did not escape the Library of the Purple Dragon before nightfall. Now you forfeit your lives. Forever more you will become one with the Army of Purple Bananas. You shall serve the Purple Dragon well…”
Later…
Matt and Kristi sat in a hot office with three fans blowing just as hot air onto them. The red head was busy playing a baseball game of some sort on his PS5, while Kristi scrolled through her phone and sipped from a glass of extra sweet tea. Finally, after hours of hearing Matt curse and grumble at the game a hazy vision came back to her.
“I had the strangest dream last night,” she began, gaining only a head tilt to show that Matt was paying her even the slightest bit of attention. “We chased a weird hole across the world and went into it -don’t say it!- and it was full of weird art and historic stuff. And there were so many books!”
She trailed off a moment in remembered awe of the vast library before shaking her head and continuing. “Anyway, you were busy playing on your phone most of the time and we wound up being chased by a hoard of purple bananas and a giant, acid spitting dragon.” She laughed a little as she remembered something else. “And we tried to climb an old rope to get out, but it broke under our weight.”
“That’s crazy,” Matt said, having already put more of his attention into the game than listening to her talk about her dream.
“We became bananas and joined the Army of the Purple Bananas,” she deadpanned at the obvious loss of attention. The only thing her statement got her was a glance from Matt that clearly asked if she’d smoked more than weed the night before. “And I never got to find out why the stupid library was there or hidden or how we even found that stupid hole and managed to chase it around the world.”
It was that particular part that was going to bother her until she finally forgot about the dream.
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