Someone Never Fits In

To be a person who is never part of the in-crowd or is part of a cliche. One who is shunned for being different or not quite a fit for the groups that may share things in common, or all participate in things that they share.

It can keep on looked upon as a loner or an outsider. It can be the start of one's never knowing where they belong or if they will develop the skills to master them in a way only, they can use to find their individuality.

To join in on one group or another just to not be alone, is not the answer. To become something that you are not or change the way that you are presently, just to accepted in, is never the answer.

Each person, no matter what age they are, no matter whether they are identified as a male or female, whether they be rich or poor, athletic or into the arts, whether they be outgoing or kind of shy. They each have to find a way to discover who they are, without outside help, to develop an solo identity which fits them personally.

One has to remember that others influence is not a reason to bow down to the pressure placed on them by those who want them to be a part of what others are or consider themselves to be already.

We all want to belong. We all never want to be alone or by ourselves. We all want to be loved and comforted and shown things that will help us to become what we want to be. But this is by our own decisions, not by others who are possibly the worst form of influence.

It can be more seriously damaging when others influence our thinking to begin thinking as they do. When one places certain demands upon us to become that which they wish us to be, then we lose our way and lose our self-identity and self-respect. We go from being independent to co-dependent.

We feel we have to have others approval before we decide on simple choices and simple things that were easy to either say yes or no to before.

Feeling like a fish out of water, leads to much worse things that make life harder to live or may make us decide a final decision that leads to eternal consequences. Still waters running deep can make one feel stagnant or useless. They lose the creativity of their mindset. They who fall for smooth talkers of lies and deceit not truly caring about your feelings or emotions, when after they fed them the reasons (true reasons) behind convincing you to change or to convert into something that was never them.

One should follow their own gut instincts and if the reason behind the decision is more like a hostage demand or tightly lipped manipulation, then one should rather decide to be alone than become a follower of those who are out for their own selfish gain.

To be destroyed by others greed, to have your dreams and ideals killed off for others to gain from you that you have lost. To steal the very thing that belongs solely to the person being convinced to change, their own identity. To be made to feel less of a human being and to be ashamed to admit they are ruled by those who claimed to be friends.

A true friend will never ask of you that which they will never do themselves. A true friend will always support you and build you up, never tear you down or run you down. A true friend will listen to what you have to say, respect your decisions and will never make fun of you, either to your face or behind your back.

A true friend sticks closer to you like a brother and will give you a way to make the best decision that is meant to be for you. A true friend will offer you sound advice. A true friend will never lie to you. A true friend will be with you through thick and thin, through good and bad, and will have your back and will hang with you during peaceful moments and warring moments as well.

Even when you cannot ever count on anyone else, when all else has been considered and has failed, there are thin blurred lines between the moments of you and them, a true friend will be the one who runs up, stands close and defend against the ones who are out to intentionally hurt and bring harm to you.

A true friend will never criticize. A true friend will offer constructive criticism, only to make sure you are fully understanding of all that they shared with you, so that nothing will be said to not completely understood. When you feel you will slip back into depending once more on the ones whom you were rescued from in the first place, a true friend will arrive to help pull you out once more.

To know you are a better person for trying. To believe that your strength will take much preparation and work to be able to use it in the ways you want to use it. To know you are able to do much and accomplish even more everyway, anyway, always, everyday.

To be the odd man out or the odd numbered player who never gets picked for playing on the team, it can be very saddening and make you want to give up. But try to place your faith in the idea that no one runs your life, no one can be given the power to make your decisions for you. No one can be allowed to ruin your life if you never give them the power to do this.

Stand firm on your own decisions. Stand up and fight for your own rights and reasons for being the way you are, who you are, who you want to be, and never being anything less than the best you can be as a human being.