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Tears rattled Sofie’s body from deep within as she staggered towards the window, after grabbing one of her four wooden chairs from around the oval table nearby in her small living room. Marching towards the living room window a few feet away, she pushed back the pink lace curtain to the left. Sliding the half side of the French window to the left, pain gripping her heart, she stared down, tears clouding her eyes. Looking down more than two hundred feet from the tenth floor, fighting the pain that was tearing her internal organs apart, rendering her helpless.
‘Maybe death is better than this?’ a voice from the depths within her wondered, sending more pain to her heart and head.
She shook her head violently, as tears flowed, staring down at what looked like ants moving below, then said aloud, “Then I need to find out if death is better than the hell I am forced to endure after watering so many dead plants.”
The beep-beep, honk-honk, vroom, whoosh, whizz of engines starting or revving, along with the flashing of lights, and tiny ant-like movement of humans, hustling and bustling to or from work or errands, paralyzed her for a moment as her life replayed.
It was rush hour.
She was flung back into the agony, hell, physical, emotional, verbal, and psychological abuse, along with the sorrow of her life. The kindness she showed and shared, despite the cruelty she was raised with and forced to endure, made her a victim. She wasn’t raised to be kind. But she loved kindness and wanted it, so she gave it. She gave it like rain feeds the earth. She gave it like the sun shines to maintain the Earth, humanity, and economies. She gave it like the moon and stars give to the night, protecting the vulnerable.
She sends kindness out into the world like the earth sends a cool breeze to lessen the heat in summer. Her many acts of kindness were like water that quenched the thirst of humans. That water allows plants to grow while feeding humanity, keeping animals alive to provide food, and maintaining life for all.
Kindness was her way of healing and helping, not adding anything harmful to the earth. Yes, she hoped to make the world a better place, using Kindness as a tool. Yet, it meant nothing to most of the humans who took it. She was watering dead plants. Being kind to some humans was like watering dead plants, hoping they would grow and give back to the earth. They never grew. Instead, they stole, cheated, used, and abused her kind actions, choices, decisions, and intentions, mistaking her generosity for stupidity. Kindness made her a victim. Standing on the chair, staring down, then putting her right foot out, she was about to lunge forward when she heard a laugh that halted her movement.
Glancing behind her, tears in her eyes, along with the pain surging in her body and mind, prevented her from seeing who was laughing, clearly. Whomever it was, laughed as if they were at one of Bob Hope, Rodney Dangerfield, and Dave Chappelle’s shows. The person clapped and laughed as if she were the show. In anger, she stepped back, eased off the chair, staring at the silhouette close to her half-closed door, still boiling in laughter.
She marched towards the shadow in anger and reached out to slap whomever it was, when someone grabbed her and hugged her tightly. They held on as she struggled.
Sofie opened her eyes, “YOU ARE KINDNESS’ written in bold letters, greeted her in a heart made of flowers, facing her on a banner hoisted between the wooden footboard of the bed she was lying on.
Glancing to the left, another sign read, ‘KINDNESS IS ALIVE IN YOU,’ between two poles planted on the wooden floor. Furrowing and unfurrowing her brows, she glanced to her right and read two signs in hearts made of flowers, ‘KINDNESS LIVES HERE,’ ‘KINDNESS MUST NEVER DIE!’
Tears streamed down, and a voice nearby said, “My name is Moses Lamarr, and you said those words at the Wallace Community Center five years ago to the survivors of the nursing home fire. I lost both of my parents, who were employed there. They died trying to save others. I wanted to end my life, and your words gave me hope and a reason to live,” the voice edged closer.
A tall, brown skinned male, with curly black hair, dressed in black jeans and a white T-shirt with many hearts on it that spelled the word ‘love’ in different fonts, eased to the left side of the bed. He smiled, showing dimples that raced her heart. He sat beside her, took her left hand, then said, “I have been searching for you since. You accidentally left your front door open.”
Moses paused as if to subdue his pain, “As I was about to knock, I heard you crying. I open the door in time to see you about to jump. Laughter was my tool to stop you because I was too far away to prevent you from jumping. And it worked. You are kind, and if you end your life, you allow cruelty to win. You give cruelty life when you try to end your life, destroying the best part of you. You really are Kindness.”
Sofie squeezed his hand, saying, “That door wasn’t accidentally left open by me; it was left open by fate and destiny.”
Giggling as if he got a joke, he shared, “That’s life telling you, kindness must never die.”
Silence played a tune as they stared into each other’s hearts through their eyes.
Then she asked, “How did you know laughter would have worked?”
“I didn’t. I was desperate; I know words wouldn’t have worked. I used the best tool I could find at that moment. But you have proven that laughter really is the best medicine. It saved your life,” he said with affection.
“I am so sorry. I got so tired of being punished and victimized for being kind, I refused to live in a cruel world,” she confessed.
“The world isn’t cruel, it’s the humans who are. Never let them and their cruelty lead you into insanity or take your life. Don’t allow them and their thoughtlessness to injure your mental health,” he encouraged.
They both laughed as he hugged her again.
Never underestimate the power of laughter.
Laughter can heal, allowing us to help ourselves and others.
Whom did you heal with laughter?
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