And All That Jazz

The houses on Clemente Avenue were nothing you wouldn’t expect from an upper-middle-class neighborhood. They were sunny, picturesque, and meant to be shown off. The men of the house would go to work each day with a kiss on the cheek, and the women would meet in the cold corners of the house and gossip about the latest celebrity news. Despite the age difference, life on Clemente Avenue was like living in a perpetual high school. The cliches were never-ending, the hierarchy could not be broken, and everyone unfortunate enough to live near the bottom is yearning for the day they can reach the sun. It was a brisk November day that would change the life of Dawn Cox forever, but she didn’t know that yet, no one did. 

Beep! Beep! Beep! A pair of sleepy eyes opened and scrambled for the phone to turn the insistent alarm off. Dawn slowly sat up in her bed and just like every day waited to hear the sound of her father leaving to go to work. Her room was painted white with a pastel blue accent wall. It was large enough to fit a study corner, a reading nook, a full wall library, a walk-in closet, and her ballet bars. Everything was in its place whether inside a neat white drawer, or the neat desk directly across from her. This was the way Dawn lead her life. Predictably, indifferently, quietly. She could hear the door close from downstairs, sound traveled well through the ventilators in her rather large house. However, if Dawn wanted some quiet, or wanted to have a private conversation with Lily, her best friend, all she had to do was clog the little square near the bathroom with a towel. 

Almost as though the sound of the door closing was her morning dose of coffee, she quickly rose, picked her outfit, and walked swiftly to the shower. Most other girls at her school showered at night, after whatever party they had been invited to, but Dawn normally wasn’t invited, plus she had her curly mane to maintain. In the shower, as she did every day, she imagined the impossible outcomes of the day. The popular girls sat with her at lunch, the popular boys complimented her outfit, she achieved the highest marks of her class, and she was finally basking in the sunlight that radiated over the in crowds heads. Unfortunately, her daydreams could only last 15 minutes at most while she hurried to wash, dress, and put her makeup on for the day. Today her outfit consisted of a black pleated skirt, a pastel blue tee-shirt, and her favorite leather jacket, not that anyone was going to notice anyway. Dawn was near the bottom of the fabled Clemente High School Hierarchy and was used to going through life unnoticed and submissively. 

As she walked downstairs to greet her mother she could smell her mother’s latest attempt at being in. Today, judging from the lack of actual food in the air, and the unbearable sound of blending, it would be a fruit smoothie for breakfast. In the eyes of her mother, anything that would boost Dawn’s social status in school would help her ensure she’s a good mother. She didn’t like to see Dawn home-alone every Friday night any more than Dawn liked to know everyone else was out without her. 

“Hey, mom,” Dawn said softly to her ever-energetic mother. 

“Good morning, Dawnie!” and after a brief pause, “Dawn, you’re going to be late! Take this smoothie with you, strawberry and blueberry, it’s healthy! Do you need a ride?” 

“No, I can walk.” Dawn preferred to look at the trees changing color in the fall, she never got tired of the nature that surrounded her on her ten-minute walks. 

“Oh, alright, Dawnie.”

Five minutes into her walk to school, she passed by Lily’s house, and right on schedule, Lily came bustling out, running towards her with a huge grin on her face. 

“Sorry, I’m late! I overslept and then I was stuck watching Jason’s latest video on TimeStop!” 

TimeStop was the latest app all the students at Clemente High were downloading. All it contained was popular kids posting little videos of themselves lipsyncing to songs, showing off their relationships, stupid little pranks, or their big homes and the aesthetic lifestyle they lived. Dawn had no time for that, well no time she was willing to spend on that. Lily, however, was the polar opposite of Dawn. Not in a way that she was popular, but in a way that she wanted to live life to the fullest unlike anyone else in town. She didn’t care about what people said, she didn’t care who was watching, and she certainly didn’t care for the status quo. 

Lily and Dawn met at the start of freshman year and immediately hit it off. Both of them were in the same dance class and loved to choreograph together. Though she wouldn’t admit it, Dawn loved to dance jazz-like Lily, but never really dared to post with her on TimeStop. 

After 5 more minutes of Lily practically bursting at the seams to tell Dawn of her crazy dream last night involving Jason, the most popular guy at school, they arrived at the foot of the high school and with a big breath, stepped inside. 

The high school was bustling, as it normally was every morning. The cliches were already forming in the halls, and no one’s eyes were on Dawn or Lily as they chatted through the hall on the way to their lockers. Quickly they passed the jocks, preps, nerds, theatre kids, band kids, and made their way to their little corner of highschool and opened their lockers. After about three minutes of passing time in front of their lockers, they dispersed to their first period classes. I would tell you more about the day as it went on, but it was the same as every other Dawn had experienced since freshman year two years ago. The part where her story starts to change is after school on the walk home. 

“Did you see Jason today? He looked so cute I literally almost died.” 

I giggled and egged Lily on, “Why don’t you just ask him out if you’re so set on him?”

“I would, but I wouldn’t. You know what I mean?” 

I gave a little nod.

“Like, it’s not like I’m afraid of his great popularity, but I really don’t need awkward

confrontation right now…” and all of a sudden Dawn noticed Lily’s eyes glow up. Lily gave a little jump and started dying of laughter. Between little gasped for air she managed to spit out, “What if we posted a dance video where I ask him out?” 

I immediately thought through my options here. I could agree to this video and be in the eye of the rest of the students here at Clemente, they could like it and somehow Jason would say yes, and Lily and I would be skyrocketed into popularity. Her mother would be so proud that she’d finally have a reason to come home late rather than 10 minutes after school ended intending to study or call Lily from her room. Or, this entire video is a failure, the students all laugh at her when she gets to school, she plummets to the depths of high school, and she never lives this down. Luckily, Dawn’s conscious is very honest and realizes that no matter what, no one will care about the video enough to watch the whole thing because Lily and Dawn were never really noticed anyway. Why not play along with this idea Lily had? After all, it’s just a dance. 

Lily decided Dawn should come home with her to immediately choreograph a dance and post the video on TimeStop before she chickened out, which Dawn knew she wouldn’t do. Lily’s house was very much unlike the other houses on Clemente Avenue. Her family didn’t like to try to assimilate to what Lily’s parents called, “The Bitchiness of Adult Boredom”. Lily’s parents firmly believed that everyone in this town only lived the way they did because they were washed up and had nothing else to do, well Lily’s parents refuse to fit in. Their home is filled with green plants, modern art, art from different cultures, and a type of excitement Dawn sometimes forgot existed. Walking into their home was like being blasted into an exotic jungle where everything was as loud as possible, and impossibilities didn’t exist. 

On a neon purple beanbag in Lily’s self-proclaimed “Fun Room”, also known as the basement, Dawn awaited Lily’s latest attempt at a sexy and cool outfit. Each time Lily came out with a new outfit her smile filled the entire room, but the next second she would plunge into doubt. This was something Dawn was not used to, seeing Lily unsure. That’s when it hit Dawn that this video was really important to her best friend, and to just sit on the sidelines right now wouldn’t be enough. 

“I really love this one, but I feel like it’s too much…” Lily muttered to herself.

“Lil, stop. You look amazing in anything of course, but you look bomb in that outfit now. If you feel confident, it’s the right one.”

Lily looked into her full-length mirror surrounded by little succulents and fairy lights. She was wearing a black backless leotard, fishnets, a tiny shirt, and three-inch heels. Dawn would never feel confident enough to wear an outfit like that but Lily certainly pulled it off. Dawn always felt more alive with Lily. Between the outrageous outfits, the sarcastic nature, and the multiple ex’s, she couldn’t get enough. Dawn looked up to the confidence Lily constantly displayed. She took a long look at Lily as she fixed her hair for the thousandth time. Her red hair was messy, as always, but not wild. The stylized kind of messy. That was the way Lily lived her life. Stylized messy. 

“Ok, Dawn. I’m counting on you to film this perfectly.”

Dawn could tell that Lily was starting to get very nervous. She’s not used to seeing this side of her. “We have all night though, we can film until you feel like it’s perfect”. 

“You know that if we do that it will never be perfect.”

Dawn was shocked. Lily has never intentionally tried to make anything “perfect”. Her projects are usually bullshitted, her makeup tended to be less than, and her outfits, while usually perfect, were usually just thrown on last second. 

“What?” Lily asked smirking. “Never seen me nervous before? The video has to be good because I refuse to be rejected online!” She let out a little giggle. 

After a few minutes of adjusting the camera to the perfect angle, Lily started her little dance. Honestly, Dawn thought this whole ordeal was ridiculous. The dance was essentially what you might see at a strip club, and the idea of using StopTime seemed so impersonal, but Dawn couldn’t say no to her best friend. They spent the entire night laughing and editing the video to only get the perfect views. At around 3:30 in the morning, both girls were delirious from exhaustion and the company. 

“Ok, ok, ok. I’m going to post it!” Lily shrieked in a fit of laughter.

“If you don’t post it right now I’m going to steal your phone from you and just post it myself!”

“OK. THREE. TWO. ONE.” 

And the video was posted. 

There are somethings in the world that seem to be created by some kind of perfect storm. The right amount of pressure, perseverance, and god knows what else can lead to the impossible becoming entirely possible. It’s strange. The next few weeks seemed to pass so quickly. Dawn didn’t understand how her life could be so different, and yet so similar. As Monday arrived, the entire school had seen it. By Wednesday Jason actually said yes. By Friday Jason and Lily were the talk of the school. Soon enough Lily stopped waiting for Dawn to walk to school with her because Jason picked her up instead. Two weeks later her video had somehow caught fire. Probably some popular girls reposted it and it blew up everywhere. It became a trend and Lily was at the heart of it. Three weeks later Lily and Dawn just kind of stopped talking to each other. 

It was a cold December’s day, like any other, that Dawn rolled out of bed, took her shower, fixed her hair, got dressed, ignored her mother’s attempt at popularity, and walked to school. She was a little early this morning, maybe she meant for that to happen, maybe the universe lead her there, but she saw the car parked outside. Jason’s little black convertible. So unnecessary. Dawn thought. 

“BYE MOM!” Lily shouted gleefully as she ran out the door, her boyfriend trailing behind her. 

Dawn had the strongest urge to turn around, they haven’t acknowledged each other in a while. She reassured herself that this kind of thing happens, even to the closest of friends. She kept walking. 

Lily was talking Jason’s ear off while he pretended to listen when she thought she saw a familiar curly-haired person in the rearview mirror. Oh, Dawn. She thought. It killed her not to be able to talk to Dawn. Seeing her walk with her head down and melting into herself hurt her so much, but what was she to do? Popular girls don’t talk to people like Dawn. That’s what her new friends said to her once. 

For a split second, eye contact was made. To be honest, Dawn wasn’t even fully sure it was real. It seemed like Lily’s eyes connected with hers in that rearview mirror. It seemed like she was unhappy like she knew Jason wasn’t listening, and that she wanted to be friends again. But soon enough Jason’s car started and they drove away. The wind blew a little colder, and Dawn kept walking.