Divine Intervention

Submitted into Contest #152 in response to: Write about a character whose life changes for the better.... view prompt

2 comments

Suspense Crime Thriller

This story contains themes or mentions of physical violence, gore, or abuse.

Divine intervention 

"Take a sip from the red cup Elaine." The Overseer says, walking toward her and the spectating devotees. 

The rusted cup is shaking in her hands. Elaine’s fingers feel the metal of the cup slowly heating up from its warm contents. Her gag reflex is becoming tough to control with the fumes and stench from the cup so close to her face. 

The Overseer has his embellished arms crossed, rubbing some of the paint and dirt off on his ceremonial clothing. With his dark and bushy eyebrows furrowed he turns his back against Elaine, shakes his head and sighs heavily. 

"I knew she was weak. Didn't we all know? From the instant her mother died from giving birth to her I knew she would grow up and become the parasite she’s always been." He turns to the crowd of devotees, raises his eyebrows and slams both of his hands into the wooden table in front of him in pure rage as he screams. 

"Didn't you all know?". 

Echoes of his madness are bouncing off of the cold stone walls in a continuous loop. The cellar almost seems to be vibrating, forcing it to remind its occupants of its old age. A wide array of fearful agreements as well as growling shouts of encouragement for The Overseer scatter across the big room.

He takes two deep breaths with his eyes closed and continues.

"Months have passed since we last held one of these holy ceremonies and she is not even willing to purify herself before her initiation while some of you, my beloved devotees, have prayed for this moment to finally arrive." He looks out on the crowd with pride. 

"We simply cannot let this impure young woman ruin this special time for us!”

 Hot tears are trickling down Elaine's cheeks, falling down onto her lap. The gags are cascading out of her, mostly because of disgust but also because of fear. 

The Overseer treads slowly toward her. The chamber falls thoroughly silent. He crouches down next to her, placing his head a mere inch from her left ear and in a swift movement he grabs her jet black hair tightly, yanking her head as far back as it can go. Elaine whimpers. The thick, reddish liquid quivers inside the cup, almost spilling onto her thin dress, making her gasp. 

"I will give you one more chance, out of the kindness of my heart, to drink your purifyer before this scrawny neck of yours is emptied out of its contents, becoming a part of the next debutant’s purifier. Would you like that, Elaine?" 

He looks at her with disgust and tilts his head, indicating the expectation of an answer. With The Overseer's painful grip still around the back of her head she carefully shakes it as her eyes pleads to him.

"No, thank you, my chosen one, the overseer of life." 

It’s quiet. Elaine’s on her knees with the red cup in her trembling hands. She knows she has to drink its reeking contents to have a chance of surviving The Overseer’s deranged loyalty test. She stands up, her legs are unsteady but she is determined. As the other devotees gasp or cheer she lifts the cup up to her mouth, closes her eyes and takes three big gulps of the liquid. A fourth mouthful tries to make its way down her throat but one weeks’ worth of porridge, bread and water comes up instead. Elaine’s body starts to cave in. A cloud of dust fans out from where her body slams into the cold, dirty floor. In the corner of her eyes she can see The Overseer walking closer to her. Her dazed, frightened stare moves from his feet, up his legs and coarse arms as. Her eyes are getting foggier. Her mind is ebbing out, becoming thousands of nonsensical pieces of a puzzle. The Overseer hunches down beside her. The sound keeps going in and out of Elaine's ears making his words incomprehensible but the last thing she hears before the blurriness becomes complete darkness are three words whispered into her ear.

“Sleep tight, rat.” 

A breeze glides through a  window in the small, bright room, caressing Elaine’s cheek as her consciousness awakens. Her body is delicately wrapped in a silky fabric and her head is resting on a soft pillow. She slowly begins to move her arms and legs, feeling her sore muscles engage. Her skin feels numb yet much more sensitive than before she collapsed. She unravels herself from the silky swaddle, untying two loose knots connecting the covers to the sheets. She’s naked and there’s not a single hair on her body except for the hair on her head. Amnesia is tangling up her thoughts, dancing in the parts of her mind that needs to focus. She can feel the tears burning behind her eyes but her dismayed state won’t let them out. She sits up in the bed but before her feet even touch the floor Elaine hears footsteps approaching the door. She has no time to think her actions through. Swiftly she lies back down on the bed and wraps herself up as neatly as possible and with a mere second to spare she closes her eyes. The key turns in the lock.

“Is she still asleep?” the soft voice of a young woman asks. 

“It appears so. Perhaps she is even weaker than I thought. The sedative is normally worn off by now. ” Elaine hears The Overseer say in his belittling tone. 

Elaine has the urge to jump out of the bed and run for her life. She knows something is wrong with the congregation, she always has. Since she turned twelve a few years ago, life has become progressively worse. Some parts of being a girl under the care of The Overseer are very unpleasant. Elaine, along with other girls her age, has been taught how to speak properly to their superiors, smile and bow their heads down when a man walks by or enters a room and most importantly, to be quiet except for when they’re spoken to. As soon as her first lesson ended on her twelfth birthday, getting the look from a few of the older women became a regular occurance. It’s always the same; A look of pity. The fear has built up inside of her for a long time, but so has the haunting curiosity of finding out what The Overseer and the other men of the congregation are up to. What are they always so secretive about? Elaine has the feeling that it, whatever it is, has begun. 

“Maisy, remove the covers, dear. I want to take a look at her.” The Overseer demands as he leans over to the desk on his right side, grabbing a piece of paper and dipping a pen in some ink.

Maisy treads lightly toward the bed. Elaine is trying her best to keep her breathing slow and steady and her eyes locked in one spot underneath her eyelids. Maisy reaches over her, looking for the knots only to find that they’ve already been untied. Maisy becomes utterly still and takes a fast, short breath. The breath is quiet enough for the note-taking Overseer to miss it but loud enough to startle Elaine, making her eyes flutter and open. Her terrified gaze meets Maisy’s stunned stare. Not a single movement escapes from either of their bodies until The Overseer breaks their trancelike state with the clearing of his throat. 

“What’s taking so long, woman?” he mutters. 

Maisy and Elaine shrugges in a startled manner. Maisy camly places her hand on Elaine’s chest and gives her a slight smile. 

“Someone tied these troublesome knots too tight again, Lord, I apologize.” Maisy’s gentle hand moves over Elaine’s eyes, closing them as she carries on. 

“There you go, my beloved, she’s ready for you now.” Maisy removes the cover from Elaine’s body, leaving her completely bare. 

The Overseer approaches the bed with his inked up pen and paper in his hands, prepared to examine Elaine. 

“She’s smooth, nicely done. She’s far too pale! Put some color on her face and do whatever you can with her dull facial features.” 

He runs his hands through Elaine’s coal-black hair. She's at her breaking point. The repulsive discomfort of being entirely naked in front of The Overseer in a room she has never been to before while being examined for reasons unknown to her is putting an immense pressure on Elaine. She would not be lying there, static, if the agonizing fear of being found out wasn’t big enough to fixate her.

“Brush her hair thoroughly. She looks like a scarecrow. Other than that, follow the usual routine. Don’t forget to make her smell nice. I will send my maids up with the pills and the makeup in a couple of minutes. She should be awake by then.”  The Overseer leaves his notes on the desk and leans in to give Maisy a kiss. 

“Yes, my chosen one, the overseer of life.” She says with a rigid smile and gives him a peck on his lips. 

The Overseer leaves the room, closes the door and locks it. Elaine sits up and wraps her bare body in the cover. 

“What on earth is going on?” Elaine pants with teary eyes. 

Maisy hushes her to listen for activity in the hall outside. It’s quiet. 

“Listen carefully, child, we don’t have much time. Do you understand me?” She squats down in front of Elaine, placing her hands on her knees. 

Elaine is shaken but stubborn. “Yes, I understand.” 

“In a few moments The Overseer’s maids are going to come in here with a small cup of pills. Do not take them. Put them under your tongue and spit them out as fast as you can but most importantly, you have to save them. You’ll have to comply with whatever anyone tells you to do. Act sleepy and confused, if you don’t they’ll know you haven’t taken the pills” 

“But, wha..” Elaine starts but is interrupted.

“We don’t have time for questions. You will find out more soon if you just trust me. You have to save those pills, do not swallow them.”

“What happens if I do?” she pleads.

Maisy sighs and digs her eyes deeper into Elaine’s. 

“You can’t. If you take those pills months of hard work will amount to nothing. We need you. You have to do this. You’ll understand more after the display.”

Elaine’s face is covered in complete confusion. “Display? Of what?”

Maisy raises her voice slightly, tightens her grip around Elaine’s knees. 

“Think Elaine. Why has every crevice of your body been shaved? Why does The Overseer want to feed you pills to comply, brush your hair and put makeup on your face?” 

Her face drops as the realization of what’s about to happen hits. 

“I… I’m the display?!” Just as Elaine finishes her question the familiar click clack of heels nears the door. 

Quickly, Maisy pulls her closer to her and whispers in her ear. “The feeling you had just before you passed out after the purifier, that’s how you should act. Just make it through the display and everything will be alright.” 

The door opens. Two dolled up women with their hair in tight buns, blue dresses and beige aprons enter the room with a trolley full of everything they could possibly need to fulfill The Overseer’s wishes regarding Elaine’s appearance. Maisy steps away from the bed and turns toward the maids. 

“She has just woken up. She’s confused, as to be expected, but other than that she’s healthy.” Maisy gives Elaine a serious yet encouraging look. The blonde, heavier maid leans in closer to Elaine and strokes her cheek. 

“You’re alright, dear, you just had a little black out after the purifier.” She pats her cheek and smiles. “To drink the sins of others can be very tiring but our holy overseer, blessed with powers from our savior, has worked his miracles and brought yet another debutant back from the underworld. Praise him!” The blonde maid kisses her fingers and closes her eyes as she raises her hand up toward the sky. The brunette, more petite maid follows her lead along with Maisy. Elaine has been taught to do the same but her thoughts are too occupied. She wants to know if these maids believe the words coming out of their mouths or if they’re willing participants in The Overseer’s scheme. 

“Let's get you cleaned up after that rough night yesterday. We’ll bring you a nice, hot soup and some medicine for your head. Does that sound okay, child?” The blonde maid leaves Elaine’s side, not waiting for an answer as she gestures to Maisy that she’s got everything under control. With one last comforting glance, wishing her good luck, Maisy leaves the room.

The sun is almost set, leaving only a gentle orange and red sheen as a reminder of the day that’s passed. The congregation’s many acres of land are mostly wrapped in darkness but the surrounding barns’ candlelit facades cast an eerily serene light on the main compound, almost making it look like a pleasant place to live. Elaine feels the gradually increasing itch on her face from the pink creme the maids smeared on certain parts of her face. She’s cold. Only her private parts are covered by a sheer, almost nonexistent fabric. Her neck has never been more sore. The constant hanging of her head in order to act disoriented is starting to have very unpleasant side effects. The unnatural position she’s been twisted into isn’t helping either. This is, however, nothing compared to the mind bending horror she feels at this moment. She feels like she shouldn’t be able to think about anything else than what’s undeniably going to happen in just a few moments but she can only think about how she ended up here. She’s in a barn, displayed as a perfect, half naked doll on a white bed, smelling like a field of flowers. Cold and alone. Things have gone smoother than she anticipated but the lack of knowledge about what she’s actually doing, and why, disturbs her deeply. To be quiet and unresponsive around the maids was easy because it gave her time to think. In hindsight she couldn’t be happier with how she managed to save the pills but to be honest, she wouldn’t mind being high off of some drugs right now. The process so far has been maddening. Elaine almost swallowed one of the pills when the maids insisted on her washing them down with some water. A cough and a gag Elaine blamed on the purifier triumphantly made the pill come back up again. As a diversion she accidentally bumped into the desk causing the pen and the small container of ink to fall over and spill. While the petite, brunette maid went to get supplies to clean up her mess, the big, blonde maid grabbed a cloth and wet it in the washroom to remove the dots of ink splatter that landed on Elaine’s foot. In those few seconds free from the scrutiny of anyone’s eyes, she could take the pills out of her mouth and hide them behind an ornamental statue of The Savior standing on the windowsill - and all of it has led her to this moment.

The laughter and stomping of what sounds like hundreds of men approaches the barn. The voice she unmistakably recognises as belonging to The Overseer is at the frontline. Elaine can’t help but shudder and tremble. She hears him clear his throat and the men fall silent. His words sound faint behind the wooden door but she can understand every sentence.

“Gentlemen, the time has finally come! Months have passed since the weak treasonist ran away and we can now say with some certainty that our savior has kept us safe from impostrous evils.” 

The men roar in appreciation.

The Overseer grabs the doorknob. 

“Enjoy this moment. Let the display begin!” 

The eyes of at least fifty men are burning holes in Elaine’s skin, making her insides turn and her body crawl. A circle has formed around the bed she’s lying in and the auction has begun. She sees about thirty men backing away instantly while muttering words of disappointment. Some men are asking for close ups, asking The Overseer for permission to touch her face and body. Requests which he grants. 

Clammy hands are squeezing Elaine’s thighs, fondling her arms and stroking her lips. 

Her jaws are so tightly closed that her teeth are aching. She expected to be efficiently inspected by strangers’ eyes but she never understood, until now that it’s happening, that their hands would be doing the examining. 

A deep voice coming from the back of the room ends the fondling of Elaine’s body abruptly.

“I don’t need to squeeze that skinny body to know I want it in my bed tonight. You can try to outbid me, but you’ll fail.” 

The room has cleared out. Elaine is left alone with the man who now owns her. He closes the door to the barn and locks it with the wooden clasp. Elaine is nauseous from fear as his heavy footsteps come closer. She can’t control the shaking of her body anymore than the sobbing or the hyperventilation. He tugs hard on the sheet Elaine is lying on. The horror of this day escapes from her mouth. She screams.

“Hey, Hey. Schh” He puts his finger up to his mouth and nods his head toward the door. 

Something about his eyes makes her calm down slightly. He slowly reaches his hand into his thick coat. He pulls out a small, leathery book and opens it. On the inside, next to a piece of metal, there’s a paper with writing on it. Elaine stares confusedly at the foreign object as she reads an unfamiliar word.

“FBI”. 

July 01, 2022 19:57

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2 comments

Karen McDermott
15:06 Jul 04, 2022

My god, the relief I felt when I read that last sentence! A truly gripping story

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Maja Samuelsson
16:17 Jul 04, 2022

Thank you so, so much, Karen! This is the first time I've ever posted a story of mine anywhere. Your kind words mean a lot!

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