Consequences

Submitted into Contest #76 in response to: Write a story told exclusively through dialogue.... view prompt

2 comments

Fiction Funny Urban Fantasy

 “Whitmores' Real Estate. Geoffrey Whitmore speaking.”

“Hello Geoff. It's Daniel.”

“Hi Danny. How are you?”

“Not brilliant I'm afraid. I've been made redundant.”

“Wow Danny. That's bad luck. What are the prospects?”

“Not very good. That's the reason I'm ringing you, Geoff. We shall have to sell the house.”

“Oh Danny I'm sorry. Of course there'll be no problem selling it. I can probably get you whatever you want for it.”

“Do you want to come and look at it?”

“Yes, better come and take some pictures and give you a valuation.”

“Can you make it tomorrow?”

“Yes I reckon. How about elevenish?”

“That'll be fine. See you tomorrow. Bye Geoffrey.”

“Bye Daniel.”

*

“Andrew Gardiner.”

“Hello Andrew. It's Geoffrey Whitmore.”

“Geoffrey! Have you got a house for me?”

“I've got just the place.”

“You estate agents! You're all the same. I suppose this one is perfect?”

“It is, really. It's absolutely ideal. Andrew, you must see it.”

“Please don't raise my hope Geoffrey. When can I come?”

“As soon as you like. I was there yesterday to value it. No one else has seen it yet.”

“Tomorrow? How about nine?”

“Great. I'll text you the address. See you tomorrow. Bye Andrew.”

“Bye Geoffrey.”

*

“Hello.”

“Julia, it's Andrew.”

“Oh hello.”

“You remember what we talked about? About getting a house in the country? You said we could try again if we could just find somewhere good to bring up the kids. Well I've found a terrific house in Surrey. I want you to see it.”

“Andrew, I'm just not sure. I've built up so much resentment towards you. It would be no good if we were bickering all the time.”

“What about the kids? Don't they miss me? Wouldn't it be worth trying for their sakes?”

“Yes, they do miss you. They're always asking about you. Oh well, alright. I'll come and see the house. I'm not promising anything though.”

“Julia, you'll love it. I know you will.”

“OK. Will you collet me later, after work?”

“I'll be round about 6.30.”

“See you then. Bye Andrew.”

“Thanks Julia. Bye.”

*

“David. It's Julia.”

“Julia, darling! This is a nice surprise. Nothing wrong is there?”

“Yes. Look David, I need to talk to you urgently.”

“Well, I've got a dealer coming round at 7.30 to see what stuff he can sell for me and what can be moved to Italy. I could come round about nine-ish.”

“David, I need to see you before that.”

“Julia, you alarm me. Is something threatening our move to Italy?”

“Oh David I'm sorry! I'm going back to Andrew. I promised if he found a suitable house in the country, I would agree to try again. He's found the most wonderful house in Surrey.”

“A house? You're leaving me for a house?”

“No David, it's for the children. Part of our problem was living in London: the noise, the stress, the constant worry about the children. It put too much pressure on us.”

“And what about you and me?”

“I don't now if it will be best for me, probably not, and I know it won't be best for you, but I have to try it.”

“Is there anything I can say?”

“No nothing. Let's leave it like this.”

“If you say so.”

“I'm so sorry. Goodbye David.”

“Goodbye Julia.”

*

“Hello Raymond. It's David.”

“Well hi David. Where are you? In Italy?”

“No. I'm afraid it didn't work out.”

“What you and Julia?”

“That's right, all over.”

“Well, I am sorry. So what are you doing?”

“Going quietly out of my mind.”

“Is there anything I can do?”

“Raymond, I need something to occupy my mind. I was thinking of starting up another business.”

“What are you thinking of? Something in the dot com department like me?”

“How's that going?”

“We did fantastically well until this bloody referendum. Everything's been in the doldrums since then. Has been all year.”

“That's the challenge I'm looking for. Some of you must be doing decently well.”

“Oh sure, we're ticking over, can't complain and it will happen again. But starting from new right now. Might be difficult to break in.”

“Yes, that's what I thought. You wouldn't consider selling your company would you? I'd give you a good price. I've been doing a bit of research and I've got some ideas. And I've got nothing but misery to occupy my mind otherwise.”

“I must say I'm interested. Listen what about a drink, say tomorrow evening and we could talk numbers.”

“Tomorrow? See you in the Swan about eight?”

“Look forward to it. Bye David.”

“Bye Raymond.”

*

“Hello. Is that Daniel?”

“Yes speaking.”

“Hi, it's Raymond here. Raymond Burgess.”

“Hello Raymond. Yes of course. Excuse me, I'm a bit distracted t the moment.”

“Not trouble I hope.”

“Yes, I'm afraid so. I've been made redundant.”

“Oh dear, that's bad. How are you going to survive? Insurance?”

“No. We're having to sell the house. There's no other way unfortunately. Anyway, that's my problem. How are things with you?”

“Things have slowed down a bit so I've decided to get out. A friend has offered to buy me out. Thinks he can make a go of it.”

“Well done. I hope he's offering you a good price.”

“That's why I'm ringing. I heard you'd had a problem and this friend, he's offered me a terrific price. I'm definitely going to accept. But I haven't forgotten, I would never have got the business going if it hadn't been for you. Certainly you were the only one willing to put money into it. Well we won and now it's time to pay you back, with interest of course.”

*

“Whitmores' Estates. Geoffrey Whitmore speaking.”

“Hello Geoffrey. It's Daniel.”

“Hi Danny. Everything going through OK?”

“Geoffrey, I'm sorry but I'm dropping the sale. I've been baled out at the last minute.”

“How's that?”

“An old school colleague is paying me back for investing in his business years ago. I'd forgotten all about it. I reckon I can survive until I get another job. May even start my own business.”

“Well, congratulations. That is good news, for you that is. Not so good for your buyer of course. I think there was a lot hanging on it.”

January 11, 2021 13:41

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2 comments

K Lewis
00:44 Jan 19, 2021

This was really creative and well-written. I loved how each conversation set off another chain, and the ending was great. The voices were well done too. I did get a little confused at the end - when David gave money at the start to Raymond, did he buy shares and subsequently sell them? Otherwise, presumably he'd share in the proceeds of a sale of the company? It sounds like he didn't just gift the money. That's a minor niggle though :)

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Crystal Lewis
12:39 Jan 18, 2021

Perfection! This is the best one I have read for this prompt yet. Loved it and so smart! Really well done ! :D

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