Death's Fall

With a deep sigh, Azrail walked into the room of Erin Davis. He dreaded this task more than any other that night. Her entire family had been so cruel and selfish that they had left an impression on the Angel’s mind. He didn’t expect this woman to be any different. 

Azrail’s gaze softened at the sight of once vibrant petals that littered the room. Vases covered the bedside table and the windowsill. He looked around the room. A sign hung above Erin Davis’s bed. It read “Get well soon, Ms. Davis!” in sloppy letters. 

The angel made his way to the woman’s bedside. The scene made the angel’s heart heavy with a sense of pity. Not for the woman, but for those she would leave behind. The ones that were blissfully unaware that today would be Erin Davis’s last. Even Azrail felt bad for those left behind. 

Azrail lifted a black, leather-bound book. “Paradise or Hell?” He muttered to himself as he scanned through the pages. Not that it mattered what he thought. The Creator had already decided her fate. No matter what personal feelings Azrail had about the soul, he always followed the Creator’s will. 

To Azrail, humanity had become tarnished by their selfish desires. Many of his fellow angels were convinced that humanity had always been this way. Yet Azrail knew better. He has been the guide of the souls of the dead since the First Death. 

Over the millennia, Azrail had grown to be in awe of humanity. They had developed a nearly infinite capacity to care. A quality his kind sorely lacked. Angels were often drones, set to do their task without question. As much as Azrail hated it, he knew that he was no different. He has stood before perfection, how could he disagree with the Creator?

In recent years humanity had declined. The stories of their lives had run dry and seemed like it was always the same. Their hearts have grown colder to the plight of the many, giving in to the needs of the one. The selfishness was something Azrail had become increasingly disappointed in. 

He longed for the days when he could experience a human’s life and be left with a feeling of contentment. Only disgust filled the angel’s heart now. Every soul was the same, it had made the process of death become mundane. Every life was just a slight variation of another that he had experienced. Azrail had become bored. 

 He longed for the days where he could listen to a human go on for hours about their lives, their community, and their day-to-day activities. About how they would miss their lives. In the end, they would accept their fate.

Now it seemed like every soul was the same. They feared the process of Death. Feared what they would lose. It became rare that one would care about those they would leave behind. The days when a soul would talk to Azrail about their time on Earth had passed. Now it seemed like all they could do now was beg for more time.

Azrail had no control over the process of death. Even though the angel could see a soul’s past, he didn’t get to decide their ultimate destination. He followed the Creator’s orders without question. Lately, the Creator had been letting more and more unworthy souls into Paradise.

Now, as Azrail stood over the frail form of Erin Davis, he stared at his book of souls, baffled. Her soul shone with a brilliant light. He closed the book and focused on her soul. Small black swirls swam in the brilliance, but that was nothing unusual. There were so few though.

Something is wrong. I must have made an error. Azrail checked the book again. A wrong name, location, time. Something, no, anything to make this make sense to him. After a few moments he slammed it shut with a heavy sigh. There was no mistake. The Creator was infallible.

Azrail walked closer to the woman’s bed. A look into her life would give the angel some clarity. His Creator was perfect. The scent of decay hit Azrail. It was powerful and almost spoiled the brilliance of her soul. The first clip of her life flashed through his mind.

Azrail watched an expensive-looking car pull up to a large house. Erin Davis, a young girl, got out of the car and walked toward the house with a somber air about her. It looked like she dreaded entering the home more with every step.

The scene faded and now he was standing in a dimly lit room. Azrail could see the same girl standing next to a small table with what appeared to be alcohol on it.

Glass shattered behind her. This turned the angel’s attention to the other side of the room where the glass had come from. A man sat slumped at his desk.

“Bring me another!” He commanded.

The girl winced at the sound of his voice. She shakily poured him another drink. As she was carrying it over the man jutted his hand out and hit the cup out of her hand. The contents of the drink covered his sleeve.

“How dare you? Now I have to clean this up.” The man was drunk. “Apologize, now,” He demanded.

“S-sorry, P-papa.” The girl stuttered. Her voice was full of fear.

“That’s not good enough,” Her father spat. “I know what will fix you.” The man grabbed a long wooden handle with the word “Cure” roughly burned into its side. The memory ended there. Sometimes this would be the case when the thoughts were too painful for the soul to relive.

Azrail recognized her father to be James Alder, a complete waste of the Creator’s gift of life. He only stuck out in Azrail’s mind so well because he was one of the most tarnished souls the angel had come across in the last two decades.

He died eighteen years ago, in a car accident. When Azrail came to collect his soul, the man tried to offer his own family up to buy himself more time. There was no hesitation in Azrail when he took James Alder to Hell.

That led into the second flash. It was an image this time, but he could feel the emotions radiate off it. The woman was standing in front of a classroom full of kids, none older than ten. He could feel joy and care from her as she made the kids feel at ease and taught them with great care. She loved her job and wouldn’t trade it for the world. Everyone seemed to love her too, from the children’s parents to her coworkers. No one had a negative thought towards this woman.

These were all signs of a decent person, but even humans that the angel had encountered had a taint in their souls. In the thousands of years that Azrail had done his job, he had met countless humans that believed that they were good and begged to be taken to Paradise. The last couple of decades much of humanity had become like that. They became motivated by two things: Fear and Desire. They feared losing the public eye. That they would gain the disapproval of their peers. The desires of standing above their fellow man. Worst of all, many would only do good things to get into Paradise. Treating it like something the angel owed them.

It was then that Azrail looked deeper into the woman’s past, not only the events, but the motives behind them. She had no fear or desire corrupting the things she had done. She did not even believe in the Creator or Paradise. She was doing good for the sake of doing good.

Another clip of her life burst into his mind. There was a handsome man down on one knee asking the woman to marry him. When she started to cry the man thought they were tears of joy until she shook her head. She apologized, saying she loved him, but they couldn’t be together anymore. When he asked why, she turned and ran from him. She didn’t want the man to suffer when the inevitable happened.

It was cancer. Even angels thought it was a horrific disease. It ate away at a human until there was nothing left. For this young woman, it was already far too late. The cancer had already consumed her heart and brain.

So she broke all ties with him. She knew her death would weigh on him for the rest of his life. She never wanted to be anyone’s burden, especially not the man she loved.

The whole scenario baffled Azrail. The angel couldn’t imagine a human would want to give up their desire to be loved for anything. They were always fighting for that fickle thing called love. Humans always struggle to keep their checks and balances in their lives. Yet this woman gave up even her love in her last days so that the man could be at peace. She suffered alone until she collapsed in her apartment and was brought to this hospital.

An overwhelming sense of sorrow washed over the angel. It was more than pity. Why? Why was he feeling this way? Could he actually care about a human? No, the idea caring about a human was ridiculous to the angel. The life and death of a mere human shouldn’t be having such an effect on him. The angel couldn’t understand.

These strange emotions swirled inside Azrail as he bent down to touch the woman’s head. “It… It’s time to come out, Erin.” His voice almost cracked from the weight of these feelings. He forced them away from the surface, trying to keep his calm expression. It was unbefitting an angel to show sorrow over a mere human. As he took his hand away, it looked as if he was pulling a small light from the woman’s forehead. The light shifted and formed into a ball and floated from the angel’s hand. He watched as the radiant ball took the shape of the woman. “It is time to move on to the next life.”

Erin looked around the room, startled, she opened her mouth as if to ask something until she saw her body on the bed. She fell to her knees as she took the sight in. When a soul takes shape it always forms to its happiest time. In Erin’s case, it was the day before the doctors told her about her condition. Seeing herself laying on the hospital bed was too much for her to handle.

Just as her light wavered, she saw the angel, dressed in a black robe. Azrail stood almost a head taller than Erin. Normally, humans looked at him with fear, yet as she looked up at him with tear-filled eyes, the angel only saw the awe in her gaze.

“Are... Are you Death?” Erin asked in a brittle voice.

Humanity had given him many titles over the millennia. Yama, Osiris, Hades, Pluto. He was always fascinated by the things humanity came up with, but none of them mattered. He was no God.

Yet, there was that name again. Death. Azrail had always hated that name. As if they could simplify the duty he carried out with such a meaningless term. Death may have been the title granted to him by the Creator, but he didn’t cause anyone’s end. He merely guided the souls from their mortal form as its vessel broke down, taking them to where they belonged and that was that. Carrying out his orders, never straying from his Creator’s design.

“That is what some would believe.” The angel said, still trying to bury his emotions.

A sense of terror filled Erin’s eyes.

“So… That’s me?” Erin asked. Her voice sounded like she would shatter at the slightest touch. Azrail could see her sense of reality had become distorted with his answer. The inevitable realization that if he was an angel, then there was a Heaven and a Hell. A true God. Azrail usually, smirked when a soul realized the truth, but not this time.

“Yes.” Azrail responded. His icy voice faltered.

It looked as if the woman couldn’t hold back the tears much longer. “I know why you are here.” A single tear ran down her face. “It’s just my time.”

The acceptance of her fate almost shocked the angel. Yet again this human had surprised him. The more injustice they face in life, the more they fought death.

“Soon your body will give out and I will take you on to the next world.” The angel’s voice cracked at the last word.

“Why is this so difficult? Just carry out your orders.” He thought to himself.

“I just have one question for you.” Erin said in a small voice.

“Oh?” Azrail raised his eyebrows and locked eyes with her. “What would you like to know?”

Her brilliant soul dimmed slightly as she opened her mouth. “My father, did he… Did he go to hell?” She sounded almost hopeful.

“Most definitely.” Azrail said with a soft smile. “Dragged him kicking and screaming the entire way down.”

Erin nodded and looked almost relieved. That made this harder for Azrail.

“Where would I be going?” She asked with more confidence.

Another unusual reaction. Most people assume they will go to Paradise, and only a few know they were going straight to Hell.

“Hell.” He choked out. After the life the woman had lived, the good that she had done, the Creator rewarded her with eternal suffering. Saying it out loud made the angel feel sick.

Shock covered the woman’s face, as it should. No one who had lived a life like hers should be destined for the same place as a monster like James Alder. Even the angel didn’t understand it. Why did this woman deserve the ultimate punishment for living a good life?

Erin fell to the floor and wept. None of this made sense to Azrail. There had to be a mistake. He took out his book yet again, hoping that something had changed. Nothing. He slammed the book shut and threw it at the wall.

Erin jumped at the sound and looked up at the angel. In that moment she stood up and took a deep breath. Her panic seemed to be pushed down beneath the surface.

Azrail couldn’t believe what was happening. This woman couldn’t accept this. She should kick and fight the angel the whole way. Not roll over and accept it. It was too much for him.

“Why? Why are you so okay with this? We aren’t talking about a brief trip to Hell, you will suffer there forever. Until the end of time.” Azrail had lost his composure. Erin gave him a weak smile. “This isn’t a joke, Erin. This is-”

“It’s just… it is just nice to know that Death has a heart.” The angel stood there baffled.

What is it about this girl? Why does she affect me this way? Why am I so upset over the fate of a mortal?

That was when the machines made their flatline song. Alarms went off, and the room became total chaos. Doctors ran around, trying to save her. There was an older woman screaming and crying at the door.

Erin walked over to the woman and reached out to touch her face but hesitated at the last second.

“Goodbye, momma…” Erin looked over at the angel who held his hand outstretched toward her. She walked over and took his hand. “Shall we go?”

The angel couldn’t accept this.

“This is too much,” Azrail thought to himself. He gripped the old book again. “This isn’t right.” This woman felt more pity towards her mother’s suffering than her own, even in these last moments. It was unacceptable. Anyone else he would have had to drag all the way to the gates of Hell. Yet, here she was. Ready to go to a judgement that she didn’t deserve.

This had to be a test of faith.

 The angel knew what he had to do.

He took Erin’s hand and wrapped his pitch-black wings around her body. In an instant they appeared in a world of light. “Where-” Erin began.

“This is your stop.” Azrail said with a soft smile.

“But this doesn’t look like-” Erin again stopped because she saw the feathers on the angel’s wings shed.

“Someone like you couldn’t be meant for Hell.” Azrail said as he took a few steps back. “If my Creator was testing me, then it is a test I have gladly failed.”

It felt good to have finally made a choice after all these millennia. The right choice. The last thing the angel saw was Erin opening her mouth in protest, but the angel couldn’t hear her. It was too late; he had made his choice. The last thing he could feel was a wonderful sensation of falling.