Perspective

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

I felt my blood pressure rise as I looked at the back of Gabriella’s dark hair, her body leaned into my closet. And not just any part of my closet, I knew exactly what she was looking at. 

She was startled by my shout and she fumbled her hands. 

“Oh! Uh…. What’s this?” She held up my old Nintendo 64 with the Princess Peach sticker on the top. It looked like a dinosaur next to the brand new iPhone sitting in her lap. 

“Who told you that you could go through my stuff?!” I quickly walked over to her and almost shoved her out of the way to get to the box. I hadn’t looked in there in ages, and with good reason. Before my family, my life had been far from happy and those were memories I preferred to keep locked away. 

“Geez, I was just curious mom and I saw some pretty cool stuff.” 

To my surprise, I looked into the falling apart cardboard and wasn’t filled with dread, but rather nostalgia. There was the copy of J-14 with Justin Timberlake on the cover, my first crush. And the Britney Spears CD that I had listened to more times than I could count, with the smudge of nail polish across her face. 

“Wow… I completely forgot what I had in here. Look!” I pulled out my hot pink Furby, eyes closed as the batteries died many moons before.

“Um.. what is that thing?”

“It’s a Furby! You put batteries in her and she opens her eyes and even makes noises when you pet her, feel!” I handed her my favorite comfort buddy and she looked at it like I had just handed her a soggy left over sandwich. “Yeah…. No thanks.” 

“Fine, suit yourself.” I gingerly put Furby back into her box with love, giving her a sweet pat on the head. 

“You didn’t answer my question, what is this??” She held up the gaming system in her hands. It still had my old Mario Kart game sticking out of the game compartment. 

“That is a Nintendo 64, only the coolest gaming system known to man.” 

She examined it, turning it over in her hands, furrowing her brows as she took in all the details. I’m sure her Gen Z brain was not impressed. 

“The coolest? I’ve seen a lot better than this old timey thing.” 

“Old timey? Young lady I’m not even 50. I think you underestimate just how with it your mom was back then.”

“Yeah, so with it that you say ‘with it’.” She chuckled. 

“Alright well if you think it’s so lame then you can just hand it back,” I went to grab it from her. 

“No, wait! Would you be down to play? Show me the ropes? I mean how hard could it be.”

I laughed. “Harder than you think. Plus I don’t know if it’ll be compatible with our TV.”

As I was finishing my sentence, Gabriella was already furiously typing into her smart phone. A few moments later she let out a triumphant ‘Ha!’

“Walmart has an adapter that’s less than 20 bucks!”

I shrugged. Maybe it would be fun, and I could spare a few dollars for an afternoon bonding with my daughter. 

We jumped in my maroon Honda CR-V and cruised down to Walmart. Before long we had found the adapter, checked out and paid for it, and were back home setting up the Nintendo. With the adapter, the whole process took less than 5 minutes. 

“I have to warn you, the whole point of the game is not to win. It’s to have fun.”

Gabriella snorted, then laughed. “What, you’re telling me I’m not supposed to try to get 1st? What kind of racing game is this?”

“A silly one, you’ll see.” 

The familiar theme music booted up.

“Oh my God, this thing is so OLD.” 

My stomach rolled. I was whisked right back to nights spent in my childhood bedroom, eyes glued to the colorful characters on the screen, theme music turned up so loud that I hoped to tune out the screaming of my parents downstairs. It never worked. 

“I think I’m gonna go with this green guy,” Gabriella selected Yoshi and I was pulled out of the past and back into the present. “Who are you going to race with?”

“Oh I ALWAYS race with Diddy Kong. I just think he’s so cute and he makes funny faces when he throws items.”

“Wait, items?”

“Yeah, you’ll see Question Mark boxes at certain points on the track, and if you run into them you’ll get a random item that will help you.”

“What kinds of items?”

“I don’t remember all of them, we’ll just have to see as we go. I do remember bananas, which you throw and leave on the track. If someone runs into them, they slip, spin out and crash. Also to play an item, make sure you hit the Z button,” I clicked the button on the bottom of the bulky grey controller. Gabriella understood and nodded. 

I picked D.K.’s Jungle Parkway to race, my favorite one. The track loaded up and we were placed at the starting line. 

“These graphics are wack.”

“They were really good for the time!”

The countdown began. 

3

2

1

And off we went! As we hit the first right turn, Gabriella took it too wide and drove into the grass. A small red figure popped up and promptly threw a coconut at her.  

“Hey!”

I chuckled. “Yeah… you have to try to stay on the track.”

Another turn and we were at the first row of Question Mark boxes, buttons clicking furiously. I received a banana, which I dropped behind me. A few moments later, Gabriella received a star. 

“Oooooh, what do I do with this?”

“Hit your Z button and see!”

She did and her character turned technicolor as she sped through the track, knocking players out as she hit them, blowing past items without stopping. 

“This is awesome!”

“Nothing can hurt you in star mode. Its fun.”

By the time we reached the 2nd lap, I was holding 3rd place, Gabriella right behind. Her ‘star mode’ rocketed her to 4th place from 8th! 

“This is awesome!!” 

But as soon as the effects wore off, a red shell crashes into her out of nowhere. 

Immediately she dropped from 4th to 6th. 

She started to drive. 

Hit with another red shell.

She took a deep breath. 

She started to drive again. 

Hit with a green shell from the side. 

“Okay… maybe not so awesome anymore.”

I laughed. “Yep, you’re stuck in what we call ‘the suck’.” 

“‘The suck’?” 

“Yeah, it’s the part of the track where the majority of players are congested, usually between 4th and 9th place. People are bumping into each other and everyone’s releasing items and it’s just chaos. ‘The suck’.”

“Well that’s just dumb.”

“I told you the point of the game was to have fun!”

“Easy for you to say, Miss First Place.” 

The race flew by and before we knew it, we cruised into the final lap. I put my focus on my drift into the upcoming turn. It propelled me forward with a fast boost, launching me into 1st and I couldn’t help but smile. I forgot how much I enjoyed this game. 

“Oh you’re smiling? I wouldn’t get too comfortable!” Gabriella launched a spiny shell, a destructive item that ran the whole track to find the person in 1st and bomb them. The shell reached me and I spun out, hitting a side wall. My 1st place slowly fell to 5th. 

“Right before the finish line!” I sighed, then laughed. “You’re a quick learner.” 

As the game finished and the end credits rolled, I thought about the power of perspective. 

I almost hadn’t gone into that old box, in fact I had almost yelled at Gabriella for it. Who knew the fun and nostalgic memories that were waiting, certainly not me. 

The sadness I felt at the insane arguments my parents would have and the heartbreak when I was stuck in the middle of their divorce years later, probably weighed just as equal as the joy that served as my escape. Hours playing Mario Kart, or giggling with delight watching the latest episode of Total Request Live on MTV. 

When I thought about childhood, I always thought about the darkness I escaped. Very rarely did I think of the happiness that saved me. 

“Even with that special shell, you still beat me.” Gabriella sat back and crossed her arms. Her hair hung in front of her face. 

“You know how many hours I spent running this? You’re playing the master!”

“Yeah, master of the world’s dumbest racing game.” She rolled her eyes. 

“For the third time, the point of the game is to HAVE. FUN.” I reached over and began tickling her. All of a sudden she wasn’t 13 anymore but the 7 year old I used to play the funniest games with. She howled with laughter and I laughed too, pushing her hands back as she tried to tickle me. We fell on the floor in a fit of giggles as Charlie walked through the door.

“Wow! What did I miss? What are you guys doing?”

Gabriella sat up, out of breath. “Ya know, just playing with the coolest kid on the block.” She pointed at me. 

“No way… is that an old school Nintendo 64?!” Charlie promptly dropped his briefcase and made a b-line for the TV. 

“Come on Gabriella, race me!”

“Mom just kicked my butt.”

“I beat you by one placement.”

“Come on, RACE ME!!” He shook his fists playfully at her.

“FINE.” 

They sat down with controllers in their hands and began to race, and the sight of a father and his daughter engaging in something so innocent and fun filled my heart. 

I thought, My life used to feel hard. But it isn’t anymore. And what a beautiful gift it is to replace those difficult memories with moments like this one. 

I sat down on the couch behind them, smiling, at peace, and grateful Gabriella had opened up my old box.