No Day At The Beach

Note: Allergies are not contagious.

I walked along the beach on a hot summer’s day, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. The sun was beaming down on me, it was going to be a lovely day.

Little did I know it was going to be the worst day ever.

Kids ran past me, and I heard one talking about his allergies. ‘Stupid child,’ I thought. Kids with allergies shouldn’t go in public, in case the allergy is contagious. I wondered what allergy the brat had, it might be a bad one. When I got home I looked in the mirror. I swear it nearly shattered when I looked at it. My entire body was bright pink, ‘I have a rash,’ I thought. I began to sweat, I was dehydrated. Then it occurred to me… I caught the child’s allergy, what’s worse was… I think he was allergic to the sun. Don’t ask me why he was at the beach, probably contaminated with the Idiot virus. It’s a tragic virus, but I don’t have time to think of that now. My life is over!

It’s been a whole week since that stupid little boy gave me me the allergy, but I still have the rash! Just wait till I get my hands on that pig! I can only go out at night now, and I have to stay in a dark room during the day. I have become nocturnal in a way. Why, why, why, did that boy have to go to the beach? He doesn’t know the danger of his filthy allergies. My skin is on fire, I have to cure myself, I have to!

It’s still Summer, the days are supposed to be longer not shorter. I want winter to come soon, I can’t live like this much longer. Last night was the worst night of my life, I was walking to the supermarket when I saw him. He was chattering with his friends about a sleepover they were going on. I saw a man walking close and decided not to give him my pain. “Stop, run! They are all contaminated, the lot of them!” They man stared at me as if I were crazy then walked away, not from the kids but from me! The idiot virus has hit everyone hard. I just don’t get it, I am the only one that hasn’t caught it. I guess I just have a good immune system.

My rash is gone! I went to the doctors last night and told them of my allergy. The next thing I knew they were calling a carriage called ‘Loones’ to take me away. Honestly, am I the only sensible person on the planet? 

If I see that boy one more time! I saw him and his useless friends having a ‘midnight feast,’ through the window of his house. I was so angry, so I decided to give him ‘Black Mail’ as everyone calls it. I wrote: I know where you live, so be warned! If you leave your house one more time I will hunt you down.’ Sure hope it ends up in his hands.

I caught it, I caught the idiot virus. I bet it’s the boy’s fault, he’s so stupid when it comes to hygiene. I woke up in THE MORNING and went to the beach. The sun shone on my back as I skipped along the sand. I was being an idiot, (Yes, the idiot virus is that bad.) When I got home the mirror smashed. I mean it, last time it nearly did but this time it did. It must be worse this time. I looked at a shard of glass and froze, I was the colour of a lobster! My rash was unbearable. THAT BOY WILL PAY!

It’s finally winter but my mood is very frosty. I SAW HIM AGAIN! The vermain and his friends were snow sledding in my backyard. “Germs, germs, germs!” I screamed. “Get out of my backyard! Be off! I said be off!” Still the boy and his friends continued dumping their germs everywhere. Soon I felt the germs climbing up my body. I ran inside as fast as I could, this was more serious than I thought. 

First I put on my gas mask, Second I put on my gloves. This meant war, so I grabbed my gun. I have never been a killer, but someone has to keep the world safe. I walked outside and gave a warning shot. BANG! The kids froze (They weren’t cold.) I wondered what the point was in warning them they were about to die when I could have killed one already. 

Time to be a hero, bullets were spraying in all directions. Smoke was everywhere, ‘I’ve done it,’ I thought. Then the smoke cleared, where were they? I felt someone tapping me on the back… “I’m contaminated!” I shreeched. The kids laughed and jumped on me, ‘I’m going to die,’ I thought. One off them had already given me frostbite.

“Get off me! Away! Stop! I shouted, but they wouldn’t stop. Soon I began to sneeze, I had caught a cold. “They have Covid, run!” Shouted the kids, they ran. 

So that brings me looking at my sun rash, again. I wish the sun didn’t hate me so much, I would be happy like that. 

Today was the best day ever! I was walking through a pharmacy getting all the cures for my diseases: Pills, Pills, Medicanie, Sunblock- Wait SUNBLOCK? You heard me sunblock. Some person has been so clever, if I wear sunblock the sun won’t give me a rash! Best day ever! As soon as summer comes I go to the beach. 

Summer.

I went to the beach in a bright mood, sun, life giving sun. I was so happy I was practically walking on air. Sadly that didn’t last long, that stupid boy was there again. He must have had some horrible disease because a second later… I was dead on the floor.

R.I.P. Me then.