Mottephobia

Jed was only 6 years old, but he had the largest collection of rare insects in the continental United States.  Jed had been obsessed with insects from the time he was born.  Or perhaps it was shortly thereafter - very shortly thereafter.  Before he turned 3, he’d learned to read from watching Sesame Street.  If there had been a steady stream of insect shows on the tv, Jed probably never would have watched sesame street.  But, when flipping through the channels, he’d never found anything interesting, so he just watched the show his parents put on.  He didn’t even remember learning how to read.  But, once he’d learned, he started using his parents phones while they weren’t looking. 

He was extremely observant, and learned how to unlock his parents phones by watching them when they didn’t know he was paying attention.  It was incredibly easy, since nobody was expecting a toddler to spy on them.  They’d unlock their phones and use them in plain sight, often while they were holding him, so he had a perfect view.  He knew what all the apps did too - at least the ones they used frequently.  He also knew where they left their phones, and when they were likely not to be using them.

At first, he’d only watched videos on YouTube about insects.  Initially, he was primarily interested in watching them flutter and crawl about.  The videos inevitably contained facts, and Jed’s fascination grew stronger.  Soon he was reading online articles about insects.  First the ones geared towards kids, then ones geared towards enthusiasts, and eventually even academic articles.  One might think this process would take years.  But Jed was reading academic articles before he turned 4. 

The entire contents of Jed’s room consisted of a bed, his closet with clothes in it, and walls lined with large display cases, with glass tops - the kind they put in museums.  The first time he’d seen a rare insect in real life, he captured it and brought it home.  He put it on display out in the open on his dresser.  He wasn’t happy about that.  Real insect collections were protected behind glass and the insects were carefully preserved.  So he’d asked his parents for all the things he’d need for a proper collection.

Jed’s parents did not want to buy him insect collection tables.  As it became increasingly obvious their son was obsessed with insects they were initially concerned that he wouldn’t develop properly.  When they discovered that he was reading academic articles about insects.  And understanding them.  At 4 years old.  They were outright disturbed.  It was difficult to admit, but they were creeped out by their own son.

They wouldn’t have bought them, except for the way he begged for them.  Begged isn’t quite accurate.  He was quietly desperate for them.  He would ask, and when they said no, he would get a look of defeat, walk to his room, and sit on his bed with a pained expression on his face.  It wasn’t pouting really.  It was more like depression.  He lost all his excitement, even for insects.  With no display case, there was no point in collecting them.  The spark of joy left his eyes.  So, after weeks of watching their 4 year old son appear to sink more and more deeply into depression, they caved in.  His dad built the display cases, since they’d never be able to afford the ones they actually put in museums, and they bought him simple supplies to capture and preserve insects: nets, jars, cotton balls, rubbing alcohol, petri dishes, and pins.

From that day forward, Jed never went anywhere without his nets and jars.  He soaked cotton balls in the rubbing alcohol and put them in the jar before putting the jars in his bag, so they’d be prepared for when he caught insects.  The light returned to his eyes, and his enthusiasm when talking about insects was spectacular.  But, his parents continued to be worried about the fact that he wasn’t making friends.

Jed had thick, silky brown hair, and big brown puppy dog eyes.  His hair was cut into a bowl cut that framed his chubby cheeks perfectly.  Kids and adults both thought he was adorable.  They were drawn to him, expecting his personality to be as cute and childlike as his appearance.  When he opened his mouth and started talking about insects, most people were immediately turned off.  Adults were typically nicer about it than kids were.  Some adults even thought his enthusiasm was cute - at first.  They’d humor him and ask him questions about insects.  When he started quoting academic journals, even the kindest of adults was unsettled.  Setting aside their uneasiness, they simply didn’t know what to say in response.

Jed’s parents invited the entire class to his 7th birthday party in late October.  Jed would have been happy inviting nobody.  In fact, he would have been happy not having a party at all.  He was as uninterested in making friends as he was in celebrating his birthday.  He was singularly interested in insects.  Two boys showed up.  It was evident from their awkward demeanor that their parents made them come to the party.  Jed’s parents sent them all upstairs to Jed’s room, where they’d set out a couple of balloon arrangements as decoration.

As they entered Jed’s room, the boys saw the insect displays and nothing else.  They exchanged looks of fear.  Nervously, one of the boys - Jed wasn’t sure of either of their names, nor could he tell them apart - attempted to hand Jed the present he had brought.  It was in a plain blue gift bag.  Jed simply put his hand up in rejection.  “Keep it,” he said as he slightly grimaced, “I have no need for any toys.  I’m sure you’ll like it if you brought it.”  The derision in his voice was evident when he said the word, “toys,” as if they were beneath him.

It was supposed to be a slumber party, so the boys had eaten dinner with Jed’s family before coming up to Jed’s room.  It was already dark out, and a full moon was visible through the open window.  The creepy atmosphere was bad enough.  They were in a dimly lit bedroom, filled with insects on display, in a swampy area.  But the cold air blowing in through the open window really pushed things past Jed’s guests comfort zone.  “Why do you have the window open?” asked one of the boys angrily.  “I’m freezing!” added the other boy.

“Oh!” Jed said cheerfully, unaware of the anger in the boys’ voices.  “I always keep it open.  Especially when it's dark and chilly.  The light and warmth really attract a lot of insects for me to capture, right here in my own bedroom!”  The boys exchanged a look of horror.  They didn’t want to worry about insects while they were trying to sleep.  At that very moment a moth fluttered into the bedroom.  The boys froze in fear.  Jed froze in excitement.

Jed eagerly watched the moth flutter in, anticipating the moment when it would be close enough to identify its species and subspecies from its markings.  As the moth came into clear view, Jed was overwhelmed with excitement.  Could it be true?  It seemed as though his most thrilling dream was coming true.  There was rumor of a rare species of moth in the area that had yet to be confirmed.  It was incredibly difficult to record every single species of insect due to the vast number of them.  There were reports of sightings of an unrecorded species of moth in the area, dubbed Hemaris regina - queen of the moths.  The people who claimed to see this creature also claimed some supernatural events had occurred, to explain their inability to catch it.  This led local enthusiasts to consider it a myth.  No one had successfully caught, or even photographed this supposed species.  Based on the descriptions Jed had heard, this appeared to be the Hemaris regina.

It was breathtaking.  To Jed.  The average person would think it was a boring brown moth, and the two boys were disgusted altogether.  Jed knew he couldn’t let his excitement show in his body.  If he made one wrong move, he was sure to scare this rare beauty away.  Despite the tensing of his abdominal muscles, the ache of excitement that ran through his torso, and the buoyant energy in his brain, Jed took calm deep breaths and relaxed his muscles, preparing them for fluid movement.  It went against his instincts.  His muscles wanted to move quickly and erratically.  He felt pricks of energy running up and down every muscle in his body.  They were begging to move.

Then he remembered the boys.  They would scare the Hemaris regina away.  His eyes opened wide in fear, and an anxiety replaced the excitement that ran through his torso.  “Don’t move,” he whispered.  Despite the fact that he barely breathed the word out, his voice was clearly audible in the sickly silence.  “If you move, I will kill you,” he said urgently in a hushed voice.  The boys believed him.  In that moment, they were more afraid of Jed than they were of the moth.  They dare not move.  They didn’t even turn their heads or shift their eyes to look at one another in commiseration.

Slowly and smoothly, Jed reached for his net.  He quickly captured the moth, and was overwhelmed with a sense of triumph and elation.  He gasped, and even allowed himself to jump twice while holding the net tightly shut.  He’d never felt this much excitement in his life.  It took all his self restraint to maintain control of his body as he quickly opened a prepped jar and smoothly guided the moth into it.  He quickly and smoothly slid the lid of the jar on top, and as soon as he sealed it, he jumped up and down while pumping his small fist in the air.

Jed couldn’t believe his luck.  Jed couldn’t believe the Hemaris regina had flown into his own room, and that he, a six-year-old, of all people, had been able to capture it.  After a moment of celebration, he sat on his bed and stared at the jar, raptly waiting for the moth to take its final breath.  The moth would suffocate quickly.  The jar was closed off from the air, and the alcohol soaked cotton ball would suck the oxygen away, leaving the moth to suffocate extremely quickly.  Then, since it was a hard-bodied insect, Jed would be able to preserve it using a dry preservation method.  He loved dry preservation.  It left the insect with a much more natural look than wet preservation, which had to be used for soft-bodied insects. 

Jed knew from experience approximately how long it would take the moth to expire.  At the exact moment that Jed expected the moth to go limp with certain death, it instead perked up with a burst of energy.  It appeared to take a deep breath and let out a scream.  The moth had let out a supersonic wail.  It wasn’t audible, but it was strong enough to shake the walls.  Jed felt his skull shake, and an intense pain shot through his brain.  He collapsed, entirely immobilized.  The moth must have been able to direct its shriek directly at Jed.  The boys appeared not to be in any pain.  Their fear of the moth, however, had overcome their fear of Jed.  They both turned, sprinted from the room, leapt down the stairs, and cowered behind the couch as they pulled a throw blanket over their bodies in unison. 

The moth’s wail had attracted tens of thousands of moths to enter Jed’s room.  Several moths flew directly to the jar and, amazingly, opened the lid.  The queen moth flew out, and made a series of supersonic shrieks.  Jed couldn’t explain how, but he knew what the moth was doing - precisely what it was saying.  It made no logical sense.  He literally couldn’t hear the supersonic waves, and had no knowledge of an insect language - in fact no belief that insects could possibly have language.  But he was certain, deep within his soul that this queen moth was directing the others in this wild escapade. 

The tens of thousands of moths all surrounded Jed.  In a phenomenal feat, they grabbed his clothes and lifted him from his bed.  They flew with him out his bedroom window.  The queen moth directed them to pin him against a tree in the swamp.  Then she called out to other creatures.  Spiders - the natural enemies of insects - and yet they were beholden to the queen moth’s cries.  Jed could feel it.  The spiders were compelled to obey the queen moth.  They had no choice. 

“Destroy this human,” she instructed.  “Suffocate him as he has suffocated so many of us.”  The spiders didn’t care that Jed had been suffocating insects.  Spiders ate insects.  Jed had never had any interest in spiders and had left them alone.  He hadn’t bothered to attack them anymore than he had bothered to observe or study them.  He hadn’t intruded on their lives in any way - except perhaps by depriving them of a few insects now and again. 

Jed felt a peace wash over him.  He should be filled with fear, but he found a poetic justice about the situation that left him accepting his fate with grace.  It was true.  He had suffocated hundreds of insects.  This was a natural consequence for his actions.  As the spiders began spinning a web around him, he was surprised that he wasn’t repulsed by the sensation.  They started at his feet, and spun their webs around both his body and the tree.  As they made their way up, the moths flew away, making way for the spiders to continue on their path. 

He was firmly pinned to the tree by the webs.  They covered his neck, then his face.  They left his eyes and his mouth uncovered, and they spun the web around the rest of his head, all the way to the top.  Then, last of all they covered his mouth in webs to suffocate him, leaving his eyes free to watch the moths celebrate his demise.  Even as his mouth was covered, Jed felt no fear and no panic.  The queen of the moths was satisfied before he was fully unconscious, and she led the rest of the moths away.  

Without the imposing force of the moth queen, the spiders no longer felt compulsed to kill Jed, and they hated having been controlled - especially by an insect.  They loosened the webs around his mouth first so that he would be able to breath.  Then they loosed the rest of the webs and Jed fell from the tree, gasping and coughing. Although he had been ready to accept his fate, he was happy to be alive in the end.  “You’ll have to stop capturing insects now Jed,” one of the spiders told him,  “If you kill even one more, the queen moth will come back for you.  You must also refrain from killing spiders.  You owe us your life, and if you fail to honor our actions tonight, we will come back for you of our own accord.”  Jed lived a careful life from that day forward.  He watched every step - literally - to avoid stepping on any small creatures, lest they get their revenge.