Just My Imagination

(Based on a true story)

The routine morning music penetrated through the sheetrock as the wall between the adjoining bathrooms held no secrets. Andrew turned off the shower water as he bobbed his head to music that was penned years before he floated in the sea hidden inside his mother. As he erased the waters from his skin, he closed his eyes for a moment as he imagined himself back in time dancing to the sweet melodies of the Motown empire. He considered that music to be pure, and would let it penetrate his soul over any modern beat. But his fantasy film was interrupted as the melody was prematurely ended.

‘Strange,’ he thought as he picked up his toothbrush to complete his morning routine. He started to brush ferociously as he believed the occupants of the other bathroom were leaving out of their space. They were his transportation for the morning, and he didn’t want to get left behind, or threatened to be left behind. But then he heard some loud talking. It wasn’t unusual for the other occupants to talk, but not without the music playing. He paused his brushing curious on what was being discussed that was so important all tunes had to be turned off. “I’m pregnant!” 

The toothbrush dove out of Andrew's hand as he stood frozen in time over what he just heard. He had to hear that wrong. Based on the stories he had heard, he believed he was the last of his kind. As he stood frozen, his mind drifted away to dreamland as he pictured a life with a new being in the house. He had reached the age where now he was the only offspring maneuvering around the nest. So as he dreamed he imagined cries echoing through the house during the dark of night. He was always the youngest, so he didn’t have much experience with a younger person with the same parents as himself. So how would he react if there was? Would he be the older brother who turned over and ignored it, or would he be the one who gets up and helps his parents out? He smiled as he believed he would be the brother who would get up and help. Then he imagined a toddler waddling around the house. He knew exactly how he would react to that moment. He knew he would show him the world. Maybe through books, maybe through internet videos, or maybe riding outside. Whatever it was, he knew the two of them would have an awesome time. And as he started to think about the wonderful times he could have with a little one, he began to thaw and return to reality. He picked his toothbrush out of the sink and started rinsing it off with a joy on his face. But as the water ran he heard another phrase behind the stream that rocked his world again. “Well, it’s not mine.”

The toothbrush dropped again into the sink, this time under a stream of water as a stream of horrid thoughts flowed through Andrew's head. ‘What did I just hear?’ he thought to himself. He had believed his parents were complete angels, never doing wrong. How did it come to this? He started going backwards in time searching for an argument that could have led to this. He thought of a few, but none that could cause this type of magnitude. Then he started searching his memory for anyone who could have been an antagonist the entire time, but he couldn’t think of any. Then he drifted back to his imaginative moments with the baby. Would this detail affect his relationship? Would he even get to see them, or would they be living in a different house? How could he show the world to someone who he never see? Hostility started to grow inside as he thought about his flawed parents who a few minutes before were flawless in his mind. “Well, I’m still going to have this baby.”

Andrew came out of his nightmare angry. He paced back and forth in the bathroom as the water continued to flow over the toothbrush. His anger caused him to become deaf to the continuing conversation. It didn’t matter anyway, he had heard everything he needed to hear. How dare they have a conversation like this on what was considered a sacred day in their household. He put his hands on his face and let out a silent scream. What was going on in the world? What went wrong? His breath started to pace like he was following behind a speed walker. He then returned to the running water and grabbed a handful to throw on his face. After a deep breath, he tossed some more on his face. ‘Was there something I could’ve done to help?’ He pondered as he continued to search his mind for answers. Another handful of water is thrown on his face. ‘Maybe I could’ve let them have more alone time. Would that have created a better outcome?’ He stares at the reflection of the handful of water as they intermingled with the fistful of tears. 

As his eyes drift down into the sink, he sighs as he concludes that everything was out of his hands. For the first time in his life, he acknowledges that his parent are just people too. They could make mistakes, or in this case, maybe it wasn’t a mistake but a choice. They have a right to that too. He walked over to the cabinet to dry his face. Yeah, he knew he wasn’t supposed to use extra towels since he already took a shower, but since his parents had something more important to talk to him about, he figured they would ignore it this time. After one more deep breath and a quick glimpse in the mirror, he left the bathroom and walked to his room. He started to imagine how they were going to approach him with this crazy news. Should he sit on the bed and wait on them, or maybe at the desk while acting like he is reading? No, he should sit in the living room by the tree and wait. That way they have a place to sit too. As he moved toward his destination, he passed the bathroom, where he viewed a toothbrush sitting out. “Oh”, he says out loud as he walks back in. They may overlook the extra towel, but their wrath might supersede the baby discussion if they see the toothbrush too. “This child is from God.”

Anger started to surge again as Andrew paused with the toothbrush in hand. ‘How dare she!’ he thought. He knew his parents make mistakes, but the mistake of blasphemy on this sacred day was inexcusable. As he transferred the toothbrush into the cabinet, his anger began to transform into confusion. He knew people made mistakes, but that statement seemed extremely out of the norm for a Sunday school teacher. Andrew puts his toothbrush into the cabinet and starts to walk out of the bathroom so he could prepare for the discussion “All I know is the baby is not mine, Mary.” 

More confusion entered Andrew’s mind as he walked into the living room. ‘Who the heck is Mary.’ he wondered as he stepped by the gifts. He sat down not knowing what type of emotions to have. Should he be angry or should he be sensitive? At this moment, he wished he was ignorant of the entire conversation because it was too much on his emotions. He watched his dad walk into the living room first. “Are you ready yet?” he says as he ties his tie. “Umm, yeah.” Andrew searched for any signs from his father that could give a hint of his emotional state. “Well tie your shoe and come on,” his dad says as he adjusts his jacket and continues his trek to the kitchen. Andrew mentally applauds him for being so strong in this situation. No normal man could hear news like that and keep going like nothing happened. 

As he bent down to tie his shoe, his mother entered the room. “You aren’t over here messing with the presents are you?” ‘You aren’t over someone house having babies are you?’ That is what Andrew wanted to reply. But he settled for a “No ma’am.” “Ok then. Did you brush your teeth?” He wish he didn’t that morning. “Yes, I did,” he replied. “That’s good,” she said as she walked to the kitchen. Andrew watched his mother as he searched for emotions and found none. Was she really that cold-hearted? Surely not the person that would come to his room when he had nightmares. Surely not the woman who would allow him to lay his head on her lap when a scary part of a movie came on. Surely that person was not a cold-hearted human being. But how could she just walk around like nothing was wrong? 

He sat on the couch in disbelief as he viewed his parents conversate in the kitchen. The conversation seemed so cordial from his point of view. His dad looked through the newspaper on the cabinet while his mother poured herself a cup of water. His dad then pointed to something on the paper to show his mom. She chuckled and shook her head in agreement. The view of a perfect marriage only perplexed Andrew more as he watched. What kind of people have a world-changing conversation like that only to return back to normal like nothing happened? His mother then looked at Andrew from the Kitchen. ‘Ok, here goes the conversation.’ Andrew thought as he prepared his mind for what was to come. 

“Aren’t you ready? Come on because your dad and I have to get there for this play.” “Yeah, I don’t know why your mother signed me up for this,” His father chimed in. “What?” Andrew asked. “They wanted adults to do it this year, and we are definitely the best candidates for the job,” his mother says.  “I guess that’s true. Back in the day, the teacher said I was so believable with my lines that I should be an actor.” “Stop lying to your son. Nobody said that. But come on Andrew, we need to go.” Andrew then looked at the decorated tree. “Oh,” he said.

‘I should probably hide that towel.’