That’s the thing about this city

That’s the thing about this city with brown roofs,untarred roads, incomplete buildings,so dusty that you sneeze from time to time,beggars to the north,the homeless to the south,the elites to the east and the middlemen to the west,everyone moves about with no iota of care in the world. There is a passage with strange people,it feels like a path for a strange meeting and you want to run,mats by your right, beds to the left,blood stains everywhere, it looks like a work of art,cries here and there and it feels like you will go deaf.There is this pungent odour that threatens to suffocate you,dead bodies here and there with maggots oozing out of their body, “why must the dead suffer after death?”came that rhetorical question, after all they could be put to proper rest by being buried.

I remember a certain hospital in my city, that hospital that reeks of death, you believe you have received your death sentence once you are referred there.Once you are there, then all hope is lost, call those who care to prepare your final place of rest, there is no salvation,for it’s going to be your last.You drag your feet and it all feels like time is moving so fast, it feels like it is the end and yes it is the end.You have being referred there too and you have no choice.You are within the walls and there is no going back, it’s feels like a long narrow passage and there is no escape. It is too late now to go back.

You can definitely feel your heart clench, you can hear the cries of pain and agony, you can hear noises and then you see that woman rush out, she is wailing, she runs to the feet of the doctor, but she is being shoved off, you watch as she wails for her loved one who is now long gone, you try hard to hold it all in, after you are about to receive your sentence too, “maybe I would get a chance” you think, but No there is no chance , “this is the end” is all that echoes in your head, it keeps echoing you feel like you might run mad, you hold your head and you feel this tingling sensation,the world seems to be going round and round in circles and you can see it. . You are about to collapse so you find a place to sit,it’s an old tattered mat that obviously belongs to someone who is now long gone, it’s yours now after all the owner is now dead.Your heart is pounding and so is your head,every part of your body aches so does your heart.Then you remember your sweet and loving Ted, your lover of five years,you left him at home with no clue of where you have gone to, you do not want to break his heart so you chose this path,you do not want to see him hurt so you chose to bear the burden all alone. It’s the last stage of a life threatening disease that has no cure, you can feel your life ebb away little by little.You feel a sudden pain in your chest, you held on to it, it was so tight it felt like you are about to pull your heart out.Then You heard the sound of a feet moving so fast, its a doctor, “emergency,emergency” was all you could hear,but your case requires urgent attention too but you get none.You do not have the strength to beckon to the doctor, there is no energy to beg for attention.You can see doctors shout at their patients, you can see nurses who move up and down, they seem to be carefree, they seem to go about their duties with no emotion, you can see bodies, been pushed in and out, some covered, some are not, you can see fathers begging for a member of theit family to be treated, you can see children, shedding tears, for theirloved one who is on a sick bed, “the condition is critical” you hear them say, your heart beats faster and then you wonder “Is this my end?”.You think about all there is to achieve, you think about your old parents who live somewhere in the city. Then your mind gets flooded with questions “did I do enough for them?,will they cry for me?,where will be buried?, will I be left to rot?,what if nobody finds out about my death?,will Ted be worried?,will he look for me?,will I be missed when I am gone?”,you have a lot of questions that no one is ready to answer.

You lay on your back on the old mat, then you think about it’s owner, maybe just maybe the person is in a sweet sour place now or maybe just maybe they got a healing ,then you think about all the sweet old days, hand in hand you go for a walk with Ted,a smile on your face as he whispers those sweet notings,the car rides, the sweet kisses,a massage for your back with a sweet music at the background.The tete-a-tete with sweet Ted.You couldn’t stop smiling as those memories came flooding back, you remember the day he became your fiancé, Ted proposed on a beach with candles all around,it felt like the whole world was watching as he went on one knee but it was just you and him.Of course nature was in attendance has you said a Yes to the love of your life and then you sealed it with a kiss that meant “ I would be here with you till the end of time”.You couldn’t stop the smile on your face but then a sudden pain reminded you of your plight, it’s about time,for you can hear the angels sing, “Hallelujah”.You can feel life slowly leave you but you know you are going to die with a smile on your face after all you have a picture of Ted in your head. “Emergency Emergency Emergency” came the voice again, it’s the voice that you have heard before,you see the face of Ted as you finally slip slowly into a pit of total darkness. “Stay with me my love” was all you hear before you took your last breath or maybe,just maybe, it’s not your last.