African Road Trip

The small town, outside the big city, a city of beasts. All types of beasts, humans, and wildlife, all in one basket. But the small town only had silent beasts. Those that speak no evil, but hear all evil. Ready to prey on the ignorant and the arrogant. Teach all the newbies how to walk, eat, and most importantly, how to keep your wallet safe. Otherwise, there are numerous amounts of people ready to pick yours and keep it safe or not so safe for you.

I know this. I learned it the hard way. Everybody does. Sometimes people lie and say that they have never been tricked in their lives, but it is all a lie. This is because they will not admit the guilt and the embarrassment that comes with it. But what they don’t know is that it is life. I love it when I go through the had times. Sometimes I just sit back and watch others go through a situation. I foresee the future sometimes. I see coming danger and all I do is to avoid it coming my way.

Nairobi, a city of all beasts. I saw myself traveling to the rural, the countryside. See the trees and escape the smoke and the dust for a little while. Bills need to be paid. However, sometimes I wished I could just spend the rest of my life in the country. However, on a Saturday, a few weeks ago. I was traveling. To visit my grandmother, who just hit a century on earth. It was going to be great.

I sat on the back of the public van, and two sits were on my right. I put my phone off. I do not travel with my phone active. I like to keep my concentration fully on myself. Minutes later, as I observed the hectic bus station, a drunk man approached the van, looked inside, half awake, in a worn-out suit, brown and shiny. Loose tie and maybe heading to his late fifties. I hoped for him to sit anywhere away from the backseat I was in, but awe unto no one, he just thought of coming to the back, however, thankfully, put his stench at the end seat, I opened the window immediately and so did he. He looked so sick, I felt uneasy just sitting a few feet away from him. The air was thin.

I couldn’t stand the bad smell, so I had a handkerchief on my face. Tied it and hoped for the best. The driver came in at the window and asked him to stop drinking heavily in the van.

“Hey, man. Please, regulate the drinking. You might get mugged. This is Nairobi! And besides, it is going to be a long way there, you need to stay awake too.” The driver cautioned.

“Do you get mugged; I don’t get mugged! Is mugged even a word?!” He insults the driver and laughs. “I have lived long enough in this town to know how not to get mugged as you say, and drinking is not one of them.” He adds laughing.

The driver cannot believe it, and he leaves disappointed.

Another guy approached the van filled the last chair, and everything was ready. The guy, the last guy, well built, neat, and shaven. A good guy, I thought. He entered and sat between me and the drunk, and the air calmed. His rare perfume filled the vacuum and finally someone I appreciated to ever seat near me. His casual wear was bright and he had a calm face.

The van took off for a 200Km journey, which I guess takes about 4hrs, to a fertile land called Nyahururu. Where my grandmother lives. I was almost getting comfortable when suddenly, the drunk. In a loudmouth and phone on loudspeaker.

“You stupid woman! You think you are going to tell me what to do!!”

“Robert, come back home or I will report you to the authority!”, the voice on the phone said, seemingly a lady, crying. At least then, I knew his name, and it was totally useless to know because, I thought, there is no way this name is going to be of help to me. Ever anywhere. Well except in this writing, but anyway, Robert was a loudmouth, the annoying loud kind of mouth. The communities who live near the western region of Kenya especially near lakes, love fish. They are all loudmouths. Physically and audibly.

Back to Robert, dark and fat lips, wide lenses, and a skinny, expensive but unkempt suit. He must have been either running or got man-handled. He hangs up after a dirty exchange of words.

“Women!” Robert said. “You return back the fifty thousand you took from the Chama.”, the voice cried. He hanged up and laughed. I noticed my neighbor already interested. If you haven’t figured out why, maybe you should go back to where it reads, Ks50,000.

He was not smiling, but I have knocked off my socks when I heard him laughing in response to Robert’s. They looked at each other and they made acquaintance by just sharing a laugh.

“ Women, right!” my neighbor said.

“Yeah. Are you one of them?” Robert asked him, bursting into more laughter.

Surprisingly, in a millisecond, I saw my neighbor’s face twitch in reaction to the painstaking remark from the drunk, but he managed to control his anger and laughed in unison with Robert. At the end of the double laughter, he said,” I am Leo. And I am a gentleman”

“ I am Robert. And I am having the best time of my life”

Remember when I said, sometimes I just like to sit back and watch?

“I can see that…do you mind sharing the drink? I am a little thirsty”, Leo said, in a friendly way, you just had to give in. However.

“Listen to me, Leonardo Di Caprio, I do not entertain men. You look like you do.” Robert told him, facing him head-on, making everyone want to look back and see their faces, I was astonished by how much people do not really give a darn about anything going on in the city of Nairobi. It has always been known who is the prey and who is the predator. And when you got the answers, you keep it to yourself. Everybody is trying to eat from somebody for somebody else that matter. Everyone needs to fight for their battles, it is a bigger war.

So, more bewildering is Leo laughed at him, and snatched the bottle from him, and gave it two of the best sips I have ever witnessed in my life. The bottle, a liter of Vodka. Maybe more, since was just wrapped in an opaque paper. Robert’s eyes went wild and wide. He never remained steady. He saw Leo swallow the alcohol and looked at him after he recovered.

“ Do you feel okay?”, Robert. “I believe I am better now,” Leo said.

“You are one handsome tanker! “, Robert exclaimed grinning.

“You think so?”, Leo asked smiling and gives back the bottle.

“I know so…”, Robert says calmly, then suddenly punches his face so hard that everyone looked back.

Then Robert shouted, “My alcohol, my property! I hope the sip you took cures the pain”

Leo recovers and wipes off the blood.

He continues smiling. He looks at him, and says with confidence, “You cannot control your woman?”

Robert looks out the window, bothered, sips more. “Robert, I can help you”

At this time, I too did not know what was going on. The drunk was supposed to speak, but he was quiet. It got interesting for me, and I really hate eavesdropping. It is against my natural beliefs of morality. This day, however, I did something that surely, I am still embarrassed to say, that I actually pretended I was not listening, and I was listening. I committed a crime against the book of the law of men. Men do not do anything related to gossip. It is however a contradictive issue.

“Listen, I will be a friend. Come on.” Leo. “talk to me.” Calmly and persuasively.

“I gave her everything she wanted. But she has been lying to me” Said Robert, sobbing.

Leo listens, handles a handkerchief. He finishes sobbing.

At this time, I was not sure what was happening, maybe it was a prank for either of them, and cameramen will come out of nowhere and say that it was all a reality show. I would not like if someone pranked me.

“You actually believe that!” Said Robert, wicked smile. “You look like a really nice guy. Go home and get a job. Trying to trick me won’t work. I may be drunk, you did have a taste of my drink, and you had a taste of my wrath. So, please leave me alone.”

“Well, played,” Leo said nodding, looked at me and I pretended I was not doing anything. He looks at me, I looked away. No trouble. Hoping he would take out his anger on me. The drunk was not so kind.

“I am a good friend Gladys.”

Leo told Robert, something that made him come to his senses. “What about Gladys?”

Leo says nothing and continues to look around, his face showing that a part of his plan has been achieved.

“Please? Do you where she is?” Robert said.

They spoke in such a low voice that I almost missed out on the dialogue, and lost in the approaching site of the distant lake Naivasha. Apparently, they started speaking one language, maybe the liquor kicked in better.

“You know what, drinking and traveling is not for many!” Robert said.

“Some will vomit and some will pass out! What kind are you?” Leo.

“I especially like to drink and eat like I don’t care.”

Robert removes another bottle and he says in a lower voice.

“Do not tell a soul.” Robert teases him with the alcohol then asks, “Are you in love with my daughter?”

“Yes, she speaks so highly of you,” Leo said.

Robert’s mind goes into another world, and his mouth says what he is thinking.

“I love my daughters, and their mother, but they have thrown me out. So, what do I do?

I opened a business for her, and she is doing well, she should be buying me a drink every day. But noooo, she says, this is none of your business not profits. No nothing.” Robert mimics his wife and daughters.”

Leo tells him, “ It would be best if you go back and return what is theirs.”

“I must be out of my mind. I will not do that!” Robert affirmed.

We reached the lake, and Leo turned to Robert.

“Hey friend, I have a place I usually stop by to eat delicious fish, do you like to fish?” Leo asked.

“Yeah, I would mind!” Robert said.

“Then, where is your cash?” Leo asked.

Robert goes into his back pocket, almost have asleep. He is struggling to keep awake.

“Bring me the juicy one” His wallet, I looked and saw him removing a thousand bob from his pocket, handed it to Leo. He put back the rest in a front pocket, and I saw Leo was all attentive, however very calm.

The van came to a halt, and Leo left with his bag. He gave the driver something, I cannot say truly what it was, and left without a trace. I was confused for a second, then I kept calm. I waited for Leo, and I don’t why up to date why I looked forward to seeing him. He never came back. The driver came back. He closed the main door and started the car.

Two hours remained and in those few minutes’ past, Robert woke up from what seemed to be a bad dream. He looked around and saw me. He looked at me, I never looked at him. I used my side vision and saw him looking under the car chairs. He turned to me.

“Hey!” He shouted. I pretended to hear nothing. “Hey! You, the dude with the big ears?”

I felt insulted, looked at him. ” Where is the guy?”

I asked,” Which guy?”.

He said, “The guy that was sitting next to me!”

I said, “Oh! That guy? I saw him talking to the driver, then I never saw him again.”

“What? YOU MEAN HE IS NOT IN THIS CAR?!” Robert shouted ask me.

“Dude, I don’t want to spoil your day, so don’t talk to me. I was asleep.” I spoke.

“You just said you had seen him talking to the driver.” He asked me coming closer, looking at me.

“Yes!” He started checking his pockets when I answered, and that is when I noticed his front pocket was empty. “Before we left Nairobi.”

“ Where is my wallet, my money!” He started getting hysterical.

“He moves closer to the driver, the van still in a tight speed.

“Hey, driver.” He called.

“What, man? Can’t you see I am concentrating on the wheel!” Driver scolded.

“Just a question….the man, that was sitting next to me. Where is he?” He questioned.

“I don’t even know who you are. What are you talking about?” The driver asked, without looking behind.” The man who was seated behind with me.” He answered.

“The short muscular guy?” He asked, confused. “Yeah. That guy!”

“He must be eating fish right now at Lake Naivasha. He offboarded an hour ago man! What’s up?”

The drivers said to him,

“I got mugged forty thousand shillings,” Robert said with a faint voice.

“I am sorry but, I might have warned you earlier. I won’t be sympathetic because I said so.” The driver concluded.