It all ends

It wasn't dark like she believed it would be. Actually, it was super fucking bright. She knew she was dying, no more oxygen and it was making it hard to think. She couldn't feel it but was aware of it. You know, like when there's something you forgot to do but you know it had to be done? It's just that feeling. It's kind of like a shedding of a skin or a layer or a peel. It's weird however you want to describe it. Death is so scary because we don't know what is next. Kinda the same with life except we feign control of life. Death is like nothingness and who can deal with nothing. At least while living we have some semblance of control.

It does all flash before your eyes. Your life. Mostly it's the lessons you learned. It all becomes crystal clear. The last thing she remembered of her life was swimming and getting tangled and gasping and fighting and the struggle then peace. Fighting for that last breath was the worst. Then it was the easiest.

She'd only been in the keys for about a month. There was something about island life that pulled her in. Maybe because she was born on an island. Granted, it was in the middle of the Chesapeake Bay but an island nonetheless. It's nothing but a highway full of strip malls now, just a route to get to the beach. She loved growing up along the creek waters and playing in amongst the marsh reeds. People knew one another and looked out for each other. She'd been searching for this again most of her adult life. She thought she'd found it again but the place grew faster than her childhood island did. Too many people. Too much commotion. The keys were exactly what she was looking for. It was a different pace here and it was WARM. She had gotten her scuba certification before moving down. Always wanting it just never doing it. That dang breathing thing just scared her. But fuck it she said. "I'm almost 65, I've got shit to do!" In the month she had been here she had friended the next-door neighbors. Their trailer was on the canal while hers was one over. They had a boat and went fishing and diving quite often. They invited her to go on the next trip. They wanted to do some spearfishing and it would give her a chance to go on a dive.

The traffic was BULLSHIT. It took two hours almost to go 8 freaking miles. She had driven in LA traffic and DC traffic. Grandpa in his RV going down highway 98 was worse. Way worse. When people overtake an area it sucks. She'd found this place by accident. Drawn to the white sand beaches and emerald waters. It was the most beautiful place she had ever seen and in the last 10 years, it apparently became the most beautiful place thousands of people had ever seen! The growth was heartbreaking. People suck the beauty out of nature. They bring their bullshit with them wherever they go. They ruin paradise she thought looking at the jam-packed road full of tourists. I think it's time to move she suddenly thought. She didn't like the thought of moving again. Not knowing a soul, again. But at the same time, she kinda liked it. Life's an adventure, right? And to be honest, she was great at making friends. People just seemed to want to be near her. She had just gotten her SCUBA cert because she wanted adventure. She'd been bored too long. Got too comfortable. And frankly, it had been on her bucket list for a long time now. She wanted to feel the freedom of being under the water. To see the animals that lived right in her beach backyard. Then go to the keys and dive there where the diving was amazing.

Routine had finally gotten the best of her. She didn't want to do this anymore. The business kept growing but she was done building it. It was time to let someone else do it. Ten years was plenty of time to devote to something. Every day was the same. The people were the same. It was cold outside too. She wanted to wake up and go sit outside with her coffee and listen to the birds and the sea every day. To have a perpetual tan and a perpetual smile. As she tugged on her coat and felt properly suffocated she went outside to her car. The wind whipped through her it felt. The iciness causing her to pull inside the coat even more. Fuck it's cold today she thought as she slipped on ice and almost fell. That was it! I'm out of here. Driving to the office hoping she didn't hit any patches of black ice. She eased her convertible into the lot thinking how badly she wanted to be able to feel the warm sun on her as she rode with the top down. Once inside she immediately started to google beaches in Florida. She was done with winter. She was done with this routine. Destin and the emerald coast came up. That intrigued her. So she booked a trip.

Write your own obituary. Well, that seems kinda morbid she thought as the professor handed out their assignments. Hmm, I guess I need to first figure out how I die, she thought as she bounced the assignment around in her head. She could come up with plenty of ways she did NOT want to die. Violent or bloody was a definite no. She didn't want to suffer in any way either. She didn't want to be so old that she was crapping her pants and needing someone to take care of her. She decided that dying suddenly while doing something fun was probably the best way to go. So, no blood. No pain. I'll die while scuba diving! Seems like a good way to go. Kinda terrifying but painless.

Lacey Grey Simpson

Born 1970 Died 2034

Lacey lived an exciting life...