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Kids


There once was a little girl named Sophia. When she turned three out of no where her father left her and her mother and never came back. At the time Sophia was too young to understand. 


Ten years later it was Sophia’s thirteenth birthday and she had big party with about 20 of her friends. They were having a blast when suddenly they all heard a knock at the door. Sophia went to go check who was at the door. When she opened the door there stood a man with brown hair and light blue eyes just like Sophia. Sophia asked who he was and he had no response and he asked to see her mom. Sophia replied “my mother isn’t here right know.” and asked again who he is he then said i’m your father. Sophia was shocked, she couldn’t think, so many thoughts were going through her head it was like a tornado. Sophia looked at her father again and felt dizzy, and then everything went blank. 


When Sophia woke up her mother stood right by her talking to her father and they both seemed very annoying all she heard was “how could you come at this point don’t you know its her birthday its been ten years james TEN!!” Sophia never liked hearing people fight it always made her feel unsafe. When her mother looked down at her all her mother saw was tears running down her cheeks and the sacred look on her face. her mother then ran towards her and gave her a big hug and said “are you feeling okay?” “Are you cold?” ”do you need a blanked?” Sophia felt smothered and just wanted to get some air.


Sophia thought to her self what if it was a good thing that her dad came along. She knew that it was wrong of him to leave but she had always wanted a father in her life. But then again her mother always said that he was a bad person but what if he changed. Sophia got up to her feet went over to her dad and looked him in the eyes and said “You’re either here to stay or you are here to leave your choice just don’t make the same mistake twice.” And then she left but when doing so Sophia’s father grabbed her hand pulling her towards him he looked her straight in the eye and said “ Im sorry, I messed up leaving you and your mother, I just want to be apart of your life.” Sophia smiled lightly and hugged her dad tight. Sophia’s mom was not happy the look on her face was terrifying. But if there’s one thing Sophia knew is that there’s always room for a second chance no matter who the person is. 




That day Sophia and her mother went to go meet Sophia’s dad at a restaurant across the street from their house. So far everything went well they all had fun together and things were starting to get better. Sophia went home with her dad and then Sophia’s dad took a wrong turn and was trying to back out when suddenly out of no where someone from behind was speeding and hit Sophia’s dads side of the car. Sophia was okay but her dad was unconscious with blood all over his face. Sophia quickly took her phone out and called 911. When the police got here along with the ambulance they quickly got Sophia’s dad out of the car and on to a stretcher.


Sophia called her mom and she took Sophia to the hospital to see her dad but when they got there they found out he was rushed into surgery. Sophia was so upset because this was the first time that she met her dad in a time that she would remember she felt empty like all was falling apart.


Awhile later the doctor came out and explained what was wrong he said “ he has suffered head trauma and is in a deep coma, his wrists are both fractured, and he has one broken rib.” The doctor was very sorry and sincere about it but he said it’s unlikely that he is going to wake up from his coma. Sophia was so upset she felt empty.

That whole night she sat there crying on her moms shoulder. She then got up and held her dads hand and began to pray. She prayed that God would keep her dad safe and for him to eventually one day wake up. She prayed that her mom and her dad would get back together and they would live a great life. 


The next day her friends came to see Sophia in the hospital. They cam baring hugs and gifts for her and her mom. Her friends took her back home to go get a shower and a new pair of clothes. After that they went to go get some coffee and they had great time but Sophia was still sad. Even though she didn’t know her dad that well she felt like he needed a second chance and she wanted to get to know him better.


When Sophia got back to the hospital she hugged her mother and sat with her dad. Her mom went down into the lobby to go get coffee and fresh air. Sophia sat with her dad telling him stories of some of her memories as a child when suddenly he exhaled fast and shot up so fast. Sophia ran and got the nurses and Sophia ran and hugged her dad so tightly and said “ please don’t ever do that again.” Her dad laughed lightly and said “ wasn’t planning on it.” Sophia’s mom returned and her face lit up in joy.


2 years past and they were living a great life. Sophia’s mom and dad got back together and all was well. Sophia was so happy and she loved her dad and was so happy he came back in her life. This shows that in different ways god works miracles and that with the power of prayer anything can happen.

May 25, 2020 18:54

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2 comments

A. Y. R
05:51 Jun 04, 2020

Here from the critique circle. So I really liked your take on this promt, the idea that someone's life could be turned upside down by as someone as ordinary as an absent father. In terms of editing, I feel like you should use more pronouns like 'him' and 'her' instead of constantly using 'Sophia' or 'Sophia's mum. It just makes the story flow smoother.

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Mary Donahue
15:47 Jun 04, 2020

Okay will do, thanks for the feedback!

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