The Neighbourhood Incident

In the last few days, three windows in the neighbourhood had been broken. David sat with the head of the neighbourhood and other members of the community discussing the strange occurrence. Though no robberies were reported, the people were on edge. Every day, there was a new broken window and today, the community members gathered around and started discussing the likely perpetrators of the act.

  David said, “I’m sure it’s the Henderson kids. Look at them, with their tattoos and uncombed hair. They spell trouble.”

    Charles Gordon, the head laughed and said, “Oh David. I’m sure that it’s not them. You’ve had an eye out for them, ever since they entered the neighbourhood and so you are very biased in your opinion.”

  David said angrily, “Charles, has the perpetrator been caught in the act? This shows that he or she is quick and nimble and that immediately points out to the Henderson kids. Moreover, no sane adult would do that. I say we all go down now to their house and confront them.” He stood up, ready to leave.

   Charles looked at David, out of the corner of his eye and said, in a lazy drawl, “No one is going to confront no one. I’m not antagonizing our fellow neighbours. We will lodge a complaint with the police and then take other measures.”

  David frowned deeply and cried, “God, how come no one believes me around here? The police won’t bother about us; until there’s a robbery and do you wish for a robbery to happen?”

 “Well, if it is the Henderson children, we don’t have to worry about that.” Charles replied, smirking.

The other members giggled and David, with his temper bubbling, stormed out of the place, his teeth gritted and his hands clenched.

  He knew who the perpetrators were and if Charles Gordon was going to be so unbothered about it, he’d have to take matters into his own hands. He rang the doorbell of the Henderson house. He looked around at the untrimmed lawns and the garden gnome figures carelessly strewn about. To his side, on a small glass table were two cups. The table was splayed with coffee stains and peering over to see the contents of the cups, he saw a fly dancing over the dark liquid. He was grossed out by the unhygienic conditions and rang the bell again. He heard footsteps approach and the door opened. It was the Henderson girl.

 “What tidings do you bring us, Mr. Hammurabi?” she said, folding her hands across her chest and leaning on the door.

 “You can’t call every lawyer a Hammurabi. This shows how deficient you are in your education. Do you even think of going back to school?” David said.

 The girl laughed and said, “Do you even think of going back to your planet? You’re hilarious, Mr. Hammurabi. Oh, how I wish I had seen you in your days of glory.”

  David glowered and cried, “I know that you and your brother were the ones going around breaking the windows. Do you understand how much you’re endangering the lives of your fellow neighbours? The people are terrified and you starting this will be a prerequisite for robberies to happen. We will lose the status of being the safest neighbourhood. Do you really want to lose that award that adorns our community hall? Oh, will you stop giving me that amused look?!”

  The girl burst out laughing, with her hands on her knees. She straightened up, after a while and rubbed off the tears in her eyes. She patted David on his arm (which he roughly pushed away) and exclaimed, “Oh, look at you using those fancy, fancy words. Oh, Mr. Hammurabi, the dignity that the sixpence cup brings along with it. How could we part with that?”

 “Stop! Tell me, was it you and your brother who did that?”

“I plead the Fifth.” she said, her face in a wide smile.

   “Then, it was you! Oh my! It was you! No one at the meeting believed me.” he said, excited and pointing his finger at her.

  “Innocent until proven guilty.” she said, taking his finger in her hand, “You need to brush up on your skills, Mr. Hammurabi. Right now, they are the ones which are deficient.”

  David growled and gritted his teeth at her, like a dog. “You want a treat?” the girl said, in a singsong way.

 “Arrgghhh!” David said and turned his back and started walking down the driveway. At the gate, he hesitated and turned back. The girl was still standing at the entrance, her hands folded and an amused expression on her face.

 “Clean that table,” he said, pointing at the one with the stains, “and take the cups inside.”

“As you wish.” she said and walked over to the table.

  ‘It isn’t exactly my wish. I mean it for your good. Think of all the germs there. And dishwashers mean no shit, you have to wash it with your hands for hygiene. Do you even have a dishwasher?”

  She lifted the cups in her hands and strode towards him. Once a bit closer, she tilted the cup at him, as if attempting to pour the remaining liquid on him. David screamed and got off the pathway and rushed across the street, his finger waggling at her. She gave a hearty guffaw and went back to her house, shaking her head.

That evening, when David returned from his evening stroll, he saw Charles Gordon and the Henderson kids. The boy was up the ladder, holding a camera. He was setting it up while the other two stood below, one holding the ladder, the other silently observing. Talk about asking the cat to guard the milk! Well, Charles Gordon is becoming a senile old man.

   He stood there, watching them and the girl caught his eye. She lifted her hand up in acknowledgment and grinned at him. Fro up high in the ladder, the boy turned to look at him and shouted, “Mr. David Hammurabi, ‘sup?”

  David bellowed back, “Shut up and get to work!” Be careful, under his breath.

David wasn’t a fan of heights and seeing the boy up there, made his insides squirm. He went home but didn’t stray from his window, till he saw the boy safely down the ladder and set off home, with the others. That night, Gordon texted him saying that cameras were installed at many places across the neighbourhood and if the offender strikes again, that they may be able to catch him. David laughed at his message and thought, if its those kids doing it, they won’t do it today. He smirked at the text and went to sleep after his usual glass of milk.

The next day, the text from Gordon surprised him. He said that the offender had been caught on camera and then asked him to come over to his place at ten. David dressed up slowly. It surely wouldn’t be the Hendersons. As much as he believed them stupid, they couldn’t be as foolish as this.

 He donned his jacket and crossed the street and entered Charles’s house. When he entered the living room, sitting on the couch, were the Hendersons and Charles Gordon. The girl was holding her phone and was looking at it with a smile on her face. When they saw him, Charles welcomed him with a hug and bade him sit on the couch. The girl and the boy were trying so hard to keep straight faces. David sneered at them and they burst out laughing. How much he hated them!!

 Charles brought out some cake and coffee and handed it to him. David bit into the heavenly chocolate cake and the others sat looking at him. He kept the empty plate back on the table and rubbing his hands robustly said, “Okay, who was it?”

  Charles said gravely, “It was old lady Louisa’s house yesterday. Poor woman! Got such a fright. The guy is quite nimble, you see, and walks faster than anyone I have ever seen.”

 “Oh, so it’s a man?” David asked, defeatedly. He eyed the boy across the sofa quizzically and the boy emulated his expression and chuckled under his breath. What was so funny?! Arrogant boy!

David jerked his head back, swiftly.

  “Yes, sadly.” Charles said amusedly, “We compiled the cameras in which he was caught and Anya will show you the clip.”

  The girl came over to his side and positioning the phone against the potpourri holder, tapped her phone and a video started to play. It was ill-lit (well, considering the night) and he recognized it to be block C, two blocks from his own. For a few moments, nothing happened and then, a man entered into the frame. He was wearing pajamas and bedroom slippers (what choice of clothes! Fool!) and was walking slowly but there was something about his gait that seemed unusual. He seemed to walk with no direct aim, sometimes he halted, and other times, he walked so fast.

  Suddenly, David noticed something. Weren’t those slippers familiar? And that balding hair? He tried to remember where he had seen it, it felt like he had seen it, so recently. Oh god! I saw this in my mirror today.

   And then, he saw himself in front of old lady Louisa’s house and saw him hurl a stone at her living room window. His hand instantly flew to his mouth and he gasped. The girl paused the video and turned to him, her eyes playful and her mouth in a wide grin.

  “Is th-that me?” David managed to blurt out.

“Yes, it is you.” Charles exclaimed. 

  David was short of words and opened and closed his mouth, like that of a goldfish.

“Apparently, you sleepwalk and because of that, you’ve caused much havoc in the neighbourhood, mate.” Charles said, “Do I cut off your limbs or let the sharks devour you?”

  The Henderson kids started laughing and David said, “Is that really me? Don’t believe these kids, Charles. They have a hundred tricks up their sleeves, what with their photoshop and stuff.”

  His dramatic enunciation and expressions set the Hendersons, guffawing again. Over their laughter, Charles said, “Oh no. They haven’t done anything; you have my surety.”

  Suddenly, the girl got up, came over to him, and gave him a hug. Momentarily shocked but quickly recovering, he pushed her away. “What the hell?” he cried.

  The girl, with her usual wide grin, said, “Yesterday, after the incident, I and Kyle started tailing you to make sure that you wouldn’t get into another mischief and we heard you mumbling something. Once we got closer, we realized you were talking about us. You kept telling me to clean the table, Do you know how unhygienic that is?” She made a rough emulation of his voice at that part, “and you were bidding Kyle get down the ladder, carefully and slowly. I’m not exaggerating, it did touch me here.” She said and placed her hand on her chest. “That was what the hug was for.”

  David was stunned and spoke, not a word.

Charles said, “Looks like you care about them after all.”

   “I DON’T!” David screamed and in a furious rage, stormed out of the house. He could hear their laughter till he reached the end of the street.

                                                                         The End