TREVITHICK’S REVENGE

TREVITHICK'S REVENGE

The huge figure towered over the room and his steely gaze fastened onto Mark McDuff and said “You are the one behind all this, you’re Camborne born and bred! You should ashamed of yourself!” He gazed intimidatingly around the rest of room and roared “Let’s hear no more of this, or I’ll be back!” With that he stomped out of the building, plaster fell from the ceiling with his every step and the councillors desks seemed to tremble in fear. The outer door slammed shut and everyone sighed with utter relief.

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It had all started when Benny, clerk to Camborne Town Council had received four visitors to his office. 

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Benny had gaped at the outrageous suggestion made by Mark McDuff. He’d been busy preparing the agenda for this month’s s agenda for the full council meeting when a sharp rap came on his office door. 

“Come in” he’d called.

Mark McDuff, Nigel Pencarrow and his cousin George accompanied by Colin Treswithian walked in. The were all members of Camborne Town Council. 

“Hi Benny” said McDuff “we came to put an item on this month’s agenda.”

“No problem” said Benny “what is it?”

“We’re proposing that we take The Trevithick Statue down in front of the Passmore Edwards Museum and erect one to celebrate the life of Fidel Castro” said Mark. The three others nodded in agreement.

Benny’s jaw dropped and then suppressing a giggle said “You do realise you’ll have a riot on your hands don’t you?”

“Look Benny by next year that statue will have stood there for a hundred years. It’s all very well that Trevithick built the first ever Road and Railway locomotives but they relied on coal to run and in today’s world coal has no place whatsoever. Whereas Castro is remembered for his advanced ideas on education for all and that seems to us to be more relevant to modern life.” His companions nodded energetically.

“You do realise that in 2034 Camborne will celebrate the 50th anniversary of Trevithick Day don’t you? Do you expect that the steam engine owners to toot their whistles at Fidel Castro with the same enthusiasm when they go around that corner?”

“Look Benny we’ve got a perfect right to put the item on the agenda the same as every other councillor, let the majority decide, that’s what I say.”

“All right Mark” sighed Benny “on your own head be it, and yours too” he said pointedly looking at McDuff’s threesome.

Colin Treswithian stuck out is chest and said emphatically “You’re just a bloody clerk Benny we’re the councillors, we decide!”

“Ok,ok, it’ll be on the agenda.”

All four councillors filed out.

Benny jumped up muttering “Close the door why don’t you. Bloody idiots!” He sat down again and sighed “There’ll be hell to pay when that comes up.”

Meanwhile the foursome had walked down the road together, and it being a fine day had sat down on the bench that’s in front of the aforesaid statue enjoying the warmth of the sun. 

“Well” said Nigel Pencarrow “Do you think we’ll manage getting rid of this bugger” nodding over his right shoulder.

“We’ll have to come up with some way to finance building a statue to Fidel Castro without it being strain on the ratepayer, that’s for sure.” Said Mark.

“We’d probably raise quite a bit from appeals on social media” said Colin.

“Perhaps we could have a raffle in the pub” said George.

“One thing’s certain” said Mark McDuff “Trevithick has to go. His inventions have no relevance in todays world.” 

Nigel Penncarrow said “Perhaps the Cuban Embassy might like to contribute something?”

Mark replied “I’ve been researching Cuba,and we could perhaps actually petition The Cuban National Assembly of People’s Power in Havana. But let’s not count our chickens well wait for item to come up on the agenda later this month.” With that they went their separate ways.

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Later that month on a Thursday evening at a full council meeting everything seemed quite normal, until that is they came to item thirteen. “Can I have a proposer for this item please.” said the chairman. Councillor McDuff raised his hand and said “I would like to propose that we replace the Trevithick Statue with a monument to Fidel Castro.”

There were a few hear hears but generally most members groaned.

“Why!” Despaired one.

“Well” said McDuff Castro has had more influence on our way of life than ever Trevithick did.”

“Poppycock” said someone.

“I’ll second that” said another.

“What’s it going to cost” asked another councillor.

“I’ve thought of that” said McDuff “rather than raising the rates I thought we could raise the money by public subscription. I know lots of people who would gladly put in a bob or two.”

“Like who?” someone asked disbelievingly.

Before McDuff could answer there was an almighty banging on the outer door of the council building. The chairman pointed at the nearest councillor to the door and asked him to answer it. They heard the door as it opened and they heard the frantic squeak made by the councillor. The heard the thump of heavy footsteps as they approached the room but they were completely unprepared for the appearance of Richard Trevithick’s statue as he towered over them all. He grasped his heavy engine in one hand and gestured at them all as if it was a feather. “What’s going on?” he bellowed. He gesticulated his engine at McDuff “This idiot sat below me last week with a few others I could mention” and his piercing gaze made the councillors shiver in fear “and plotted to remove me for Castro of all people! The reason I stand there day and night is not just because of my inventions but what I contributed to society and its development. This pup Castro all he did was cause mayhem, educated a few children and because of his policies most Cubans are still driving around in patched up vintage cars. I am at least three generations before this man! I’m a contemporary of the likes of The Duke Of Wellington, Beethoven, Napoleon and born years before the likes of that whippersnapper Stephenson! It was I who invented both the road and railway locomotive. If I hear any more about this I’ll be after those who seek to undermine me. I haven’t perched on that bloody piece of granite all these years, day and night to be replaced! So there!” With that he stomped out of the room and the building shook with his every step. The outside door slammed shut.

“Well” sighed the chairman “shall we move on to item fourteen.”