A rock and a hard place

When Amara dropped the bomb,we were in the middle of a game of mortal kombat. Our avatars stood still as our hands were frozen on the pads.

Amara was pregnant.

We'd known she and Deji had been together "like that" for a while,but we'd assumed they were being safe. Apparently,they weren't.

We asked Amara what she wanted to do,and she looked at us and laughed. I thought she'd lost it. Sola looked as confused as I felt.

She didn't want to keep the baby.

She had already consulted an abortion doctor,and had an appointment the next day.

We tried to convince her not to,but Amara could be stubborn when she put her mind to it.

So,we followed her to the clinic.

The doctor was really nice,albeit strange. He called us aside to talk to us about Amara.

He brought out bundles of Naira notes,and offered to give it to us and more;all we had to do was leave him alone with Amara for a few hours.

Sola was the first born of her family. Her father was gravely ill,and he needed a lot of money for the surgery that would save his life.

I saw Sola struggling with her conscience,so I helped her out,and collected the money from him,after all,he was just a doctor. What could he possibly do to Amara?

Sola was hesitant when we left,but I'd known her father for a while,and he was one of the nicest people I'd ever met. I wanted to save his life.

When we came back to the clinic,Amara had just woken up,and the doctor said the procedure was successful.

The baby was gone.

Fastforward 8 years,and we were still friends.

Solas father had undergone his surgery,and he was alive and kicking.

Amara had been trying to have a child with her wife for a while now,but she just wasn't conceiving.

They'd been trying out Artificial Insemination for a year,but Amara still hadn't gotten pregnant,and her wife was physically unable to carry a child,as she was trans.

She'd finally begged me to go with her to see a doctor,and I agreed.

On the way,Amara talked about how she couldn't wait to hold her baby in her arms,and that Sola and I would be it's grandparents.

When the doctor told us what was wrong,our jaws dropped.

Amara did not have a womb.

But that wasn't possible,she screamed.

She'd gotten pregnant once. There was no way she could be without a womb.

The doctor asked her if she'd done any surgery before,and she said yes,once, for the abortion.

The doctor was confused.

Then,she realised.

The doctor had taken her womb,probably for ritual purposes.

Amara could never have a child again.

When I told Sola,she begged me to tell Amara the truth about what we did.

Amara was under anaesthesia the whole time,so she never knew we'd left her with the doctor.

I didn't want to tell Amara. I didn't want to lose her.

I'd been in love with her for as long as I could remember.

I went over to Solas house to try to convince her to keep quiet about the situation.

I reminded her that I hadn't taken a dime from the money the doctor gave us,and the blame would be totally on her.

She didn't care. She felt horrible about what had happened to Amara,and she wanted to get the guilt out of her conscience.

I felt bad,too,but I couldn't even think about how Amara would feel if we told her what we did.

I looked at Sola and made up my mind.

I told her that we would go over to Amaras place and tell her everything,but she needed to calm down,first.

I went to a drugstore close to her house,and I got her a packet of calming green tea.

I got back to her house and made the tea for her,and watched her drink it.

I stood up to leave,and so did she,but she fell down instantly,mumbling something about not feeling good.

Then she stopped moving entirely.

I rushed over to her,checked her pulse,and finding nothing,I began to scream.

Sola died on her floor that day.

It was a dark day. One of the darkest days I'd ever known.

I'd lost one of my best friends.

After the funeral,I told Amara I had to be alone for a while,and I went to the bridge that we used to go to a lot as kids.

I dug my hand in my pocket and brought out the little vial I'd kept since the day Sola died.

I thought about how I'd walked into the drugstore,slipped the pharmacist a brown envelope filled with money,and asked him to give me something that could kill instantly,and wouldn't show up in an autopsy.

I'd told him that I was in an abusive marriage,and all I wanted was to get out of it.

He gave me a little vial filled with clear liquid,and when I got to her house,I'd dumped it in her drink.

I loved Amara too much to let her live the rest of her life hating me,and so I'd fixed it.

Amara and her wife got a divorce,because her wife couldn't deal with her not being able to conceive,and Amara moved in with me.

Lately,we've been getting closer,and I can tell she's beginning to develop feelings for me,so I guess you could say this worked out perfectly,except maybe for Sola.

But that was a necessary evil,to protect the love of my life.

Sometimes,when I'm feeling particularly sorry for myself,I think about Sola,and I break down in tears.

I cut her life short,because of my selfish needs.

But then I try to think about a life without Amara,and I shake myself out of my funk.

It was worth it.

It was all worth it.

Now,I ask you,dear reader. Am I a bad person?

Look into your innermost thoughts and desires,and tell me.

Would you sacrifice everything for the one thing you want the most?

Would you throw away all morals and sensibilities,If it meant your happiness?

I only did what each and every one of you would do.

Call me a monster.

Call me a demon.

I guess that's what love does to you.