After rain comes a rainbow

Meow…

Lili purred softly while rubbed her tiny head against my scarf. Lili didn’t like these wet, rainy days. And so did I. Rain in Charlottetown came in a sudden with dark grey clouds, covering completely the whole sky, left us nothing but an unpleasant smell - petrichor. Rain brought the steaminess, the darkness, the frightening noise to this peaceful town. Horrifying.

I remembered the day Dad left for his last-minute business trip was also on a rainy day. That was the last day I met him, the last carefree day of my family. A house which was full of delightful laugh, of joyful smiles, of unstoppable giggles now then turned into a quiet, exhausted cage without the existence of Dad. Empty.

It happened three weeks ago, actually. Dad received a phone call from Dr. Thunder early in the morning, telling him to attend an emergency meeting immediately. My dad was a doctor, by the way. He risked his life, to save the others’. “My patient’s life is my life, sweetheart” he whispered to me right before he left, “I have to do my best to save them”. So the last message I received from my dad was not even about how much he loved me, or how sorry he felt, but about his patients. How ridiculous?

The meeting was about the novel virus outbreak in New Brunswick. My dad and his team were sent to Fredericton to help support medical services while preventing the disease to spread quickly. He departed instantly in the afternoon without even saying goodbye to me. Like a flash.

Dad, being infected by Covid-19, died three days after that. I didn’t even have a chance to meet him for the last time. I just couldn’t believe my incredible superhero, my best of best mood booster who never seemed to run out of dad jokes, passed away. My dad was gone. Forever.  

Mom was like a zombie after being informed of the news. Just like me. We lost track of time, didn’t bother to eat or talk. We lived for nothing. Our shelter was twisted into a muted, inaudible atmosphere, and the only sound that could be recognized was definitely from Lili. Lili was confused as well, I believed. She looked at both of us with her innocent eyes just like she was trying to ask the specific explanation for all of the mess that was occurring. No one could give her the answer. Neither my mom nor me. Speechless. 

Three days went by, I thought the worst was finally gone. We could just go back to our normal life then. But I was wrong. The worst was yet to come. It was mom’s high-pitch scream from her room that signalled me something was wrong. I sprinted upstairs, stormed to the room and everything I saw was mom lying there on the velvet rug. She committed suicide, the police announced. Nightmare. 

Three weeks and both of my parents were gone, unpredictably, unacceptably, unbelievably. They always told me I was the most precious gift that they’d been blessed with, that they would never ever let me down, that they would be by my side all the time. Lies. Big lies. Now they both left me behind, in this depressing world. I would have to fight alone to survive from now on. Could I actually do that? I didn’t know. Even if I daydreamed, I would never expect my life could involve these dramatic circumstances. What did I do to deserve such pathetic karmas like these? Unknown. 

Rain always brought me these kinds of depressing thoughts. They haunted me day by day, night by night. Ghosts. Depressions were ghosts. They tightened my throat, shouted to my ears, tore my heart to pieces. They remained nowhere but inside me. They pushed me toward the enormous dark hole that they’d already dug. The closer I was to the hole, the worse I felt. I’d better give up. 

“Knock! Knock!”

No one had come to visit me for days. Who could possibly knock my door during this terrible weather then? I could just ignore it and go back to my plan for escaping. 

But Lili didn’t let me do so. She jumped down the ground, rushed to the entrance then scratched her nails on it. I hadn’t seen her so energetic like that since the day Dad took happiness with him to the other world. I followed Lili, opened the door. I didn’t know, until years later, that was the best decision I’ve ever made.

There was a blonde hair guy standing in front of my sight. His boots were all wet. He was standing there, holding a navy blue umbrella in his left hand, and staring at me in a shocking way.

“It’s you! I finally found you!” He cried. 

“Who are you?” I suspiciously asked. I was pretty sure I haven’t met this guy before.

“I’m Ben.”

It turned out that Ben’s dad was one of my dad’s patients who had already recovered from the deadly virus. And he came all the way from nowhere to my house to say thank you. How sweet?

Ben told me how amazing my dad was. My dad brought light to his family. He and his family couldn’t explain how thankful they were so he came here to talk to me in person. I didn’t know why but that evening I told him everything about what I’d been through for the past few weeks. Every single thing.

My life then changed completely when Ben came. He was like the rainbow that comes after the rain. He coloured my black and white world, pulled me away from the dark hole and made me know that I couldn’t give up. Life was not over. It was a beginning.

Rain could be extremely lachrymose but after the rain was a glowing day. Rain washed away the tears, erased the obnoxious memories and left us a refreshing start. What following the rain was a new journey. Wake up. Stand up. Move forward. You can do it! Thank you, rain.