DISCOURSE TM

| "Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."

| "Aya Seck's performance as the princess was...underwhelming." 

|| "Honestly I agree. The original was a masterpiece. Perfectly made film." 

|| "The costumes were so bad omg." 

|| "The original is what got me into high fantasy. Very disappointed with the remake!" 

|| "Don't worry. They'll do a better job when they inevitably remake the remake in twenty years."

|| "I don't know...the original is kind of overrated too, lol." 

|| "Shameless cash grab."

|| "The original also sucked."

|| "You're totally right but HER fans are coming for you." 

|| "They're coming for you." 

|| "Why would you say something so controversial, yet so brave?" 

|| "They're coming for your neck, lol." 

|| "They're coming for you." 

|| "I'm so tired of these comparisons to the original." 

|| "Ironic because your take is not original." 

|| "Literally nobody asked you." 

| "I'm muting this thread now."

* 

| "I liked the film, but I could have done without the unnecessary sex scenes."

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

|| "Yes! Honestly, are sex scenes ever necessary? They're always so icky ugh."

||| "Right?! Why not just cut away like did in old films?" 

|||| "Old movies are so much classier than the stuff they put out now. We need a bit of that old-fashioned repression back. Some of these writers/directors should be on a watchlist." 

||||| "I say we get the government involved! They can ensure that sex scenes are choreographed for maximum thematic relevance and lock up everybody that participates in gratuitous ones! We will do this for the children!" 

|||||| "Exactly!" 

||||||| "...I was being sarcastic." 

|||||||| "And I unironically agree with you. Now what?" 

||||||||| "What are you a hundred years old?" 

|||||||||| "I'm 14." 

||||||||||| "@#$%&!" 

* 

| "I don't care how hard they try to force Aya Seck down our throats, that girl is not her mother! Not even her father! She cannot act and can barely sing!" 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

| "Call me an ugly nobody all you want. Her mother was FLAWLESS in the original. Aya doesn't measure up!" 

|| "The cultists will slit your throat at her altar tonight, but I want you to die knowing that you are right!" 

|| "They're cooking you but you're so right." 

|| "They're cooking you omg." 

|| "The fans are absolutely pan-frying you for this stay strong." 

|| "They're coming for your jugular omg." 

|| "Nobody asked you." 

|| "Nobody asked you, Hatchet Face!" 

|| "Streets are saying your brother took a big whiff of that chlorine just to get away from you." 

||| "Could you please delete this? The Kisima Co. incident claimed several lives ( including my cousin's) and families of the deceased and injured are still fighting for damages." 

||||"Aww no :/. All's fair in love and war bestie." 

|| "You're comparing two goddesses to one another as a talentless ugly nobody with no awards..." 

|| "Delete this and then delete yourself." 

|| "True. I think she should stick to making music? She performed the song that played over the end credits and that was pretty good." 

||| "Why does she have to limit herself to one thing when she's multi-talented?" 

|||| "Are these multiple talents in the room with us now? Because they were not present on set, that's for sure." 

||||| "Yet she's the one getting invited to award shows while you work your 9 to 5." 

|||||| "Do you not also work a 9 to 5? She's been going to award shows since she was in diapers BECAUSE HER PARENTS ARE FAMOUS not because she was born a triple threat." 

|| "Why does she have to "measure up" to her mom? Why can't she just be judged as an individual performer?" 

||| "She wasn't "judged as an individual performer" during casting. Her parents' work is what opens doors for her. Comparisons are inevitable because people are looking for the resemblance and, unfortunately for her, her parents are legendary." 

|||| "So, she has to be phenomenal just because her parents were? Why can't she just be ordinary or even mediocre? Talk about a gilded cage." 

||||| "Lmfao! You cannot be serious." 

||||| "Why isn't the wealthy nepobaby allowed to be mediocre?! Switch that brain on!" 

* 

| "I struggled to fully articulate my thoughts on AToSuD right after watching it last night, but the ongoing discourse has catalyzed the crystallization of a few points in my analysis 1/276." 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

|| "So...did you like the movie or not?" 

||| "Did you read the thread or not?" 

|||| "The thread doesn't make any sense. I'm seriously confused." 

||||| "Work on your comprehension skills and then read it again." 

|||||| "I teach English Literature. I've read it twice and the second half completely contradicts the first." 

||||||| "Doesn't take away from my point." 

|||||||| "WHICH IS WHAT??? WHAT IS YOUR POINT???" 

* 

| "Kind of a dumb story. The princess should have just done what her parents were telling her to do from the start...crisis averted." 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

|| "How do you miss the point this badly?" 

|| "So you'd pay money to watch Crisis Averted: The Film?" 

|| "Girl..." 

|| "I feel like anyone this dumb should be dragged out back and shot." 

||| "Eish! Relax." 

||| "I agree with you." 

 * 

| "Eh. It was worth it for the main girl's tits." 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

|| "Petition to weed out and ban all accounts held by 14-year-olds on this site." 

||| "I'm 64." 

|||| "Ewww." 

* 

| "I cannot get behind the romanticization of unhealthy relationship dynamics. That's what ruins it for me." 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

|| "A Tale of Sturm und Drang is an iconic dark romance..." 

||| "So? Must romance always be linked to violence and mind games?" 

|||| "Of course not. But that kind of thing is a feature of the genre. The genre being DARK romance." 

||||| "Okay but don't you think it's kind of gross when explicit scenes and messed-up dynamics are included in a story just to titillate the audience? Because what other reason could there be?" 

|||||| "What's wrong with just titillating the audience?" 

* 

| "Everyone is losing their minds over this silly movie. Meanwhile, no progress has been made regarding the massive UFO that's been hovering over Kinshasa for the last 388 days. Increased rates of violent crime in various parts of the city have been correlated with the movement of the thing's shadow. There's people that are dying...but nobody wants to talk about that." 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|--

|| "Nobody wants to talk about that? Really? It's all every news outlet has focused on for over a year now! Get real." 

|| "Are you stupid? Or did you just fall off the UFO yesterday?" 

|| "The solipsism is strong with this one." 

|| "Our thoughts and prayers are always with the people of Kinshasa." 

|| "Do you seriously believe you're the only person paying attention to THE GIANT UFO?" 

|| "Please get over yourself." 

|| "Literally what are we supposed to about it..." 

|| "You need to relax. Try smoking a blunt. Maybe while watching the movie." 

|| "They're saying the energy beam that killed all those fish in the Congo River probably wasn't carcinogenic/toxic. Seems like it was just extreme heat that killed them. The effects are limited to the water." 

||| "Whew. That's a relief." 

|||| "Yeah, I was so worried." 

* 

| "The woke nazis will be the downfall of Art." 

--|"Am I the only one who didn't love the A Tale of Sturm und Drang remake? I mean, it was cute, but it didn't blow me away like the original."|-- 

|| "Without a doubt." 

|| "They cannot create. Only soil and destroy."

|| "This cannot be allowed to go on." 

||| "THEY cannot be allowed to go on." 

|| "Absolutely useless wastes of breath." 

|| "We must choose. The extermination of the woke forces or the destruction of civilization." 

|| "We all know what we are called to do." 

|| "Woke Nazis...What are you dummies ever even talking about?" 

|| "You put the moron in oxymoron."

|| "I guess this terrifying thread is my cue to log out of the hellsite for a while." 

* 

| "I'm getting so sick of seeing the A Tale of Sturm und Drang arguments on my timeline." 

|| "Agreed!" 

|| "So sick of it for real." 

|| "That conversation has dragged on for TOO LONG." 

|| "I don't even want to watch the movie anymore." 

|| "Like?? Can we move on?!" 

|| "Everybody had better wrap it up by Friday!" 

|| "Let's talk about something else, abeg." 

* 

| "Unpopular opinion: people who don't shower AT LEAST thrice a day are disgusting!" 

| "I don't care what your excuses are! You stink!" 

| "Muted <3. Argue with the wall." 

|| "Who do you people think you're fooling? Lol." 

|| "I can't imagine only showering twice a day. Gross." 

|| "Congratulations! You are today's main character!" 

|| "You're getting cooked." 

|| "They're grilling you, friend." 

|| "Will you pay my water bill so I can shower thrice a day?"

|| "Your opinion reeks of unchecked privilege." 

|| "How long have you been unemployed?" 

|| "It's crazy that I'm addicted to this app because I hate you all so much."

|| "Are the Personal Hygiene Olympics on again already?" 

||| "Right? I could've sworn we settled this debate like three weeks ago lmao." 

||| "Looks like Nairobi is hosting this time around." 

||| "In a few days we'll revisit The Birthday Dinner Bill Question and, from there, circle all the way back to Aya Seck." 

|| "An alarming number of children living along the East African coast are stepping on radioactive sea urchins and developing strange abilities...but none of you are ready to have THAT conversation." 

|| "Here we fucking go..."