Jeannette, This too Shall Pass

Upon opening my eyes, I immediately noticed that I was surrounded by water. I was drowning, the water was salty and it was dark. It made me scared. I've always had a deep imagination about what lurked in the depths of any body of water, especially if it's the ocean. You can say I've always feared drowning. I have no reason why such fear occurred to me but it existed. I panicked a little until I noticed a glow above me getting farther and farther away from me as I was about to sink further into the saltwater.

And so, I swam above. I swam until I reached above, my arms and legs, tired from the swimming I've done to just reach the surface. I took deep breaths, gasping for air as I try to float myself, trying to see for any buoy I could use as a resting place, even if it is for a while, just before I could regain any stamina to paddle even further into the saltwater. I thought I was in an ocean since I couldn't see land. I can't tell where my north is from my south. I can't even tell the time. I just floated there, breathing in the salty air as I try to keep myself afloat. I found a boat that I'm pretty sure is meant for canoeing and not meant for the open seas and it looks it managed to survive the harshness of the sea storm that happened earlier. I swam towards it, as I took a deep breath before I manage to reach the seemingly untouched canoe. I climbed aboard it, coughing as I tried to get the salty seawater out of my lungs that I managed to take in while I was swimming.

I then reminiscence the time before the seastorm occurred, the family yacht was full of life as me and my family members all tried to head back into the shore, as was planned by my dad. My brothers and sister were all trying to clean up the yacht as my mom prepared for dinner. We all had fun, singing some songs to pass time, even if the storm was starting to brew from the distance. My sister was scared, but my older brother managed to calm her down. He too was worried, but panicking isn't what the rest of my siblings needed. They needed reassurance that all will go well for us. I can hear my mom calling my dad in worry from the outside as we barricaded ourselves in the bedroom. My little brother was full-on crying as he tried to calm himself down. He feared the storm will kill them all, just like all the times where the people who stayed in the open seas will die, just like in the movies. I also feared the storm. The sea where we are surrounded. I could hear my heart pounding loudly every minute as I dazed off from reality.

"-ean?"

My heart pounding even harder as I became more worried about the sea storm. About my family's lives if the storm hits our way and we don't survive.

"Jean? Jeannette?"

I looked at my siblings, my little brother's tears still spouting from his eyes as he looked at me. His eyes were full of fear and sadness.

"Jeannette? Hey, are you there?"

Then towards my little sister, who is looking at me with anxiety, her eyes and face red from her crying session earlier. Her eyes now have hints of new tears at the edges of it, looking like she is about to cry another river of tears.

"JEANNETTE?! Listen to me sweetie, okay? You're gonna be-"

And finally, to my big brother. He looked panicked, as he stared at me with eyes full of tears but he refused to let them fall free. His hands at my face as he wiped the tears off my face. Huh? Since when did I cry? I then felt him pat my head as he hugged me. He's so selfless, choosing to comfort me and the others but never himself. He whispers words of comfort and tried to assure me, us, that everything will go well.

"Jeannette, everything will be okay, alright?" I don't think so Rain. I thought at that time but chose not to say it as the rest of my siblings eyed me with concern, faces red, and eyes full of tears and fear. "Jean, right now, this will be all a nightmare and by tomorrow, we'll be out there with our friends and relatives, you'll get to watch the fashion show that you wanted so much-" I can now hear my mom and dad screaming at one another, voices muffled but distinguishable, only for a little as the storm from the outside seems to have made the voices harder to listen to. The sloshing of waves against our side of the yacht made me want to vomit but I steeled. My siblings went near to us as they both sought comfort from us. I then wrapped my arm around Rainier as he continued spouting random facts, to try and comfort us.

I then felt something wet by my shoulders as I realized that my older brother is crying. He's also scared, I realized as I then tightened my hug around him. Everything after that was a blur as adrenaline seemed to be the only thing that kept me surviving. I panicked, trying to get my siblings to survive, yet I somehow failed, as pretty sure is evident by being the only one that managed to survive the storm. I felt tears bursting into my eyes as I cried for my inability to protect them. I felt weak, weak for not trying hard enough. Weak for not doing even better. Even if only one sibling survived, I don't care. And yet I failed them all. Rainier, Ysabelle, Alexander. I'm sorry.

As I eyed the clear, dark sky full of stars from my boat, as I took a deep breath as I felt my anxiety go up. I then remembered what Rain told me before the tragedy struck,

"Jeannette, this too shall pass".

Rainier has always been a bookworm and a dork, just as I have remembered. I eyed the stars above, seemingly untouchable from the mess here on Earth. I hope that someday, I'll be forgiven by them. But someday... Just someday.