Pleading In Darkness

The silence was deafening. Usually I preferred quiet, but this was unbearable. My eyes wouldn’t focus in the darkness. This caused a slight panic when I started to make out a faint noise in the background, completely drowned out in the fog. Someone whimpered. The noise someone makes when desperately trying to hold back from sobbing.

“Riley …”

I strained. My name was barely audible, but someone was trying to get my attention. My heart was racing, and I could start to make out an outline of a figure, sitting down with their head in their hands.

I stretched out my arms to reach the figure when it abruptly stood up and walked away. The sudden movement caused my body to jolt awake.

I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling above me. An immediate wave of pain crashed against my skull. I slammed my eyes shut again, trying to ease the pain and regain complete consciousness. The dream left me distraught and disoriented. I laid in bed for a while longer until I started to feel normal again. Just as any dream, however, it started to slip away from memory as I opened my eyes once again and tried to remember where I was and what I needed to do for the day.

I sat up in bed but was greeted with a spinning room and blurred vision. I groaned and reached for the glass of water I usually kept by my bed, only to realize that there was nothing there. I let myself rest for a few more minutes until my eyes readjusted and I felt more stabilized. I looked at the clock and my stomach dropped. School had started an hour ago.

I got up as quickly as my body would allow and rushed to get ready. As I walked out the front door, I reached for my keys I usually kept on a hook, but they weren’t there.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I was beginning to get frustrated. I walked outside to notice that my car wasn’t even in the driveway.

“I swear I’m gonna kill her,” I said to myself, thinking that my sister had taken my car to school, something she would commonly do if I stayed home sick. Without any other choice, I started trudging the two miles to school.

It was nearing the end of November and the cold air stung my face as I tried to walk as quickly as I could, with only the crunch of the dead leaves trailing behind me. I made my way up the steps of the school, through the front doors, and finally into my first class of the day. I braced myself for the glare I’d receive from my teacher for getting to class ten minutes before it ended, but when I walked in, the teacher’s back was towards the class and not a single soul looked in my direction. I took this as a good thing and quickly made my way to my seat.

I noticed the work on the board was something new and material we had not been introduced to yet. I flipped through my notebook, but had nothing related to what the teacher was talking about. With no energy from this morning, I figured this class was a lost cause and decided to rest for the remainder of lesson.

I was soon making my way to my second class, anticipating telling my friend, Aubree, about the morning I had. Contrary to the previous class, I was one of the first few people who arrived and taken a seat. One after one, students filed into the class, but Aubree never showed.

“I guess she’s sick today,” I thought to myself, disappointed.

My teacher started taking attendance and I noticed that she didn’t say my name. I raised my hand and was about to tell her when I was interrupted.

“Aubree texted me to tell you that she won’t be here because she’s taking the card we made yesterday to the hospital. She said she’s hoping to bring back good news,” One of the girls in the front row said.

The teacher merely nodded and continued calling names.

Hospital? A card? What were they talking about? I started to become worried. Was Aubree okay?

I turned to the person next to me and tried to get their attention, but was unsuccessful. I noticed a boy turn and look in my direction. He had a sorrowful look on his face as he just stared at me.

What was going on?

I tried to brush off the weird feeling that was creeping up inside of me. The class eventually finished and instead of going to my next one, I made my way to the bathroom. I had started to feel worse and lightheaded. My body was heavy and my feet dragged against the ground.

Upon entering the bathroom, there were three other girls surrounding the paper towel dispenser. I walked towards the far end of the bathroom and looked into the mirror. To my horror I was extremely pale, and my face was slightly sunken in. I almost couldn’t recognize myself. I splashed water against my face, hoping my eyes were playing tricks on me.

“Do you think she’ll ever wake up?” I heard one of the girls say.

“I don’t know. I heard the crash was really bad. Her car was completely totaled.” The other said, running her hand through her hair.

“How do you think Aubree is doing? Her and Riley were always together.”

My stomach dropped at the sound of my name. I was right here. Why were they talking about me as if I weren’t.

I could hear my heart pounding in my ears and my breathing was becoming heavier. My chest felt like it was getting tighter.

“Um…,” I stuttered. “Could you explain what’s happening?” I said to the girls, walking up to them.

Not a single one turned their head.

I could feel myself start to panic.

“Can… can you hear me?”

No response.

“Well, no matter what happens, I hope Riley is okay.” The third girl said. They walked out.

My vision started to blur and the room was spinning. I clutched my chest as a sharp pain spread through my body. My other hand gripped the wall as I tried to balance myself. The last thing I remember was feeling the cold tile of the bathroom floor as I slipped into darkness.

***

“Riley… please… can you hear me?”

There was a weak, pleading voice that emerged from the fog I had entered once again. This time I could make out the figure of my mom. She was standing above me, tears running down her face. She looked like she hadn’t slept in days.

“Mom,” I tried to speak, but nothing came out. I could feel a lump in my throat.

The fog was becoming thicker and I watched as my mom became distant, disappearing into the unknown.

I wanted to cry and I felt my body begin to shake again. The shaking became uncontrollable until my eyes shot open.

I sucked in as much air as I could, my lungs on fire from not breathing. I sat up and realized I was still on the bathroom floor where I had passed out. The room was much darker and I couldn’t hear anyone out in the hallway. I got up and walked out, instantly making eye contact with the clock on the wall.

It was 8pm. I had been unconscious for the entire day. 

My body began trembling and I backed up into a locker, slowly falling to my knees as I covered my mouth with my hand, hopelessly trying to silence my sobs. I felt so weak. Confused. Terrified.

What was happening to me?

I looked around through tear blurred eyes. The school was empty. I couldn’t stay here.

My mind returned to the conversation I had overheard in the classroom. The hospital. I needed to go there.

I found the strength to get up and start walking. It was about an hour later when I finally reached the hospital. I went to approach the front desk when I remembered no one could see me. I stumbled around the floors of the hospital, desperately trying to find my family.

It wasn’t until I was on the third floor when I opened a door to my mom and dad, completely broken, sitting over the edge of the bed that someone was in. I hesitated and called out to them.

No response.

I found the courage to walk over to the bed and look down. Tucked under the covers, strapped to several different tubes and wires, was my own body, lying there, nearly lifeless.

I turned my body, unable to even process what was happening.

Silence filled the room. The only noise that could be heard was the sound of my own heart monitor, beeping at a steady, but slow, pace.

I turned back around and walked up to the bed again. With a trembling hand, I touched my arm. I pulled back quickly, shocked at how cold it was. I swallowed the lump in my throat and returned my touch. I stared at my body for a while, time stopping in that moment. My eyes traveled down my own body, when I suddenly saw my finger twitch.

My heart started racing.

“Riley…” I spoke to my body. “Riley… please… wake up…” My voice was weak and shaky.

I watched as my other fingers start to twitch as well.

“Honey! Oh my god. Look! Her fingers are moving,” The scream of my mom caused me to fall back and drop my own arm. She was immediately out of the room, yelling for a nurse.

I noticed that the movement stopped as soon as I let go. Realizing what I had to do, I quickly touched my body once again, watching as more movement began to occur. 

“Please…” I pleaded.

As I watched my own body move, the space around me was becoming smaller and fading away.

I watched my own eyes flicker open and nurses flooded into the room, rolling away my bed without hesitation.

That was the last thing I saw before I collapsed, all of my energy completely drained from my body.

***

The sun peaked through my curtains, painting lines across my floor. I blinked a few times, regaining my vision. I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I was in my room again.

“Hey sleepyhead,” I heard a voice come from the corner of my room.

I looked over to see Aubree get up from a chair and sit on the edge of my bed. Memories from the previous day flooded into my mind.

“You… you can see me,” My voice was hoarse, my throat dry.

Aubree smiled. “Um, of course I can?” She chuckled slightly.

I quickly embraced her and felt tears stream down my face.

“Whoa, hey, are you okay?” She rubbed my back.

I wanted to explain… I really did, but I just didn’t know how to.

“I’ve… just been through a lot,” I said.

“You can say that again. You were in a coma for a while. You had us all scared.”

I felt sick. “A coma?”

Aubree looked confused. “Yeah, the nurse explained this to you?”

I had no recollection of this.

“Shouldn’t I still be in the hospital if I was in a coma?” I asked.

“What do you mean?” Aubree asked.

“I woke up yesterday. Shouldn’t they have kept me longer?”

Aubree’s mouth faded into a thin line. She looked at me, face contorted, confused.

“Riley… you woke up five days ago.”

My body went numb, nearly paralyzed with fear. My mind was running frantic, trying to make sense of the situation. I… I watched my body wake up yesterday? I touched my arm… I watched the nurses rush me out… I –

My eyes grew wide as realization set in. I had been living in the past, a lost soul watching how life continued on while my physical body was trapped in pure, utter darkness.