Unlikely but Unconditional

  ‘ Doesn’t the sky just fascinate you? The way it can depict a constant battle in nature, with no words? The way the velvety beep blue and steel grey clouds imposes upon the wispy white and light blue ones as a storm ensues; the way the golden beams of the sun can penetrate all of those dark pillowy clouds- dissolving them to nothing; the way the pinks, purples, blues, and yellows seamlessly melt together to make the perfect sunset.  All of which can bring people to tears with the surge of emotion that it induces… and all with no words.’  Icis Lewis, or Ice according to her friends, inquires as she watches the Tumultuous skies rumble in the distance.

  ‘Bitch, what the fuck are you talking about?’  Lana Isaacs laughs as she wipes the sweat from her brow, slowing her brisk walking pace so that her long-time friend could catch up.

  ‘But seriously Ice, are you high?’ Lana jokes as she elbows Icis in her ribs.

  ‘One, how are you even walking that fast? And two, I am always a little high.’  Ice counters as a smile tugs at her full lips, one of her deep dimples attempting to make an appearance.  ‘And It’s just one of those weeks.  What’s the plan for tonight?’  She asks, blatantly changing the subject.  

  ‘I don’t know, you tell me. Are We cooking or eating out? Watching reruns of Ozark or heading to Juney’s to dance some energy away?  I’m down for whatever.’  Lana nonchalantly answers- staying true to her blasé personality.  She was always the chill one in the friendship; the only person that could bring Icis out of that dark place her mind goes sometimes.  It has been like that ever since high school. Ever since Icis walked in on Lana getting bullied in the ninth-grade girl's bathroom by Marsha Reid. Marsha and her goons had told Lana they would help her with her makeup but instead had turned Lana’s beautiful fair skin into a clown face;  huge red lips, black circles around her eyes, and circular red dots on her flawless cheeks-staining the young girl's fair skin.  Lana knew exactly what was going on when she walked in.

  ‘ So, what’s going on here?’ Icis asks as she casually leans against the bathroom door frame and inspects her deep purple fingernails.

  ‘Why the fuck do you care?’ Marsha sneers as she eyes the deep white scar that marred the side of Icis’s caramel-brown face.  At five foot ten inches of lean muscle, large almond-shaped icy pale blue eyes, and long silky straight black hair that hung to her narrow waist - she wasn’t someone that people dismissed, but the seven-inch scar that ran from her temple to her jaw made people look twice.

  ‘Because I don’t take kindly to bullying.’ Icis answers with quiet menace.

  ‘Get the hell out of here scar face before we help out that hideous line with a little makeup.’  Marsha taunts as she flips her perfectly styled blonde locks- her cackling friends laugh behind her.

  ‘Oh, Marsha! Let’s not get bitchy… let’s instead discuss this because I heard some stuff.  Some stuff that you might not want me to know.’ Icis smiles as sugary poison oozes from her tone.     

  Marsha studies Icis slowly, gauging her sincerity, before responding, ‘ Well I’m waiting.’

  Icis grins cruelly knowing that Marsha took the bait.  ‘According to a very reliable source..’ She begins as she eyes one of Marsha’s clan members, Sharon, causing the teenager to shift uncomfortably, before continuing,  ‘was telling another person that you wet the bed till you were fifteen!’  Icis finishes dramatically as Marsha’s face drops in horror.  ‘She even said that you had to wear special underwear that vibrated to help you stop.  Where did they vibrate? Was it a good vibration?’  She grins as Marsha’s horror transforms into pure hatred.

  ‘Bitch I will fuck you up.’ Marsha seethes as she steps closer to Icis.

  ‘Bring it bitch. ‘ Icis murmurs dangerously as dark shadows begin to fill her icy blue eyes.

  Marsha stills as she studies Icis warily.  She must have seen that other side of Icis creeping slowly into those breathtaking eyes;  the side she keeps well hidden from the world. The side of her that had formed to protect herself when she was ten. The side of her that kicked in on that horrible March night when the side of her face was sliced open and her only options were to live or die. And all of this from someone who was supposed to love and protect her.

  ‘Let’s just agree, you leave her alone and I don’t put your little secret in the school paper.’  Icis winks as she returns to her relaxed lean against the bathroom door frame, her eyes gleaming with a clear warning.

  ‘Whatever scar face.  You and your pathetic friend deserve each other.  Two losers.’  Marsha scoffs as she and her group saunter out of the bathroom door, each one of the three friends mimicking Marsha’s look of contempt.

  ‘By pissy pants!’  Icis responded with sugar-coated venom, a predatory grin gracing her full lips as her eyes followed each girl out.

  ‘Well, they were just delightful.’  Icis smirks as she turns to leave the bathroom.

  ‘Thank you!’ Lana squeals before Icis could exit the bathroom.  ‘I’m Lana. Lana Isaacs.’

  ‘You’re welcome and I’m Icis. Icis Lewis but my friends just call me Ice.’  Icis responds as she, again, tries to exit the bathroom.

  ‘That’s funny.. your initials are I.L.  and mine are L.I.’  Lana giggles despite the ridiculous makeup on her face.  ‘I’m headed to get some lunch, you want to join? ‘ She asks before Icis could get through the door. ‘After I wipe all this off, of course.’ She jokes quietly.

  ‘That’s sweet but trust me when I tell you, we aren’t friend material.’  Icis retorts with a chuckle as she sizes up Lana.  

  ‘I might surprise you if you gave me a chance.’  Lana answers quietly without breaking eye contact.  ‘Sometimes the best friendships are with opposites.’ 

  Icis maintains eye contact as she reads the quiet strength in Lana’s eyes. The sheer determination that sat in her tightly held heart-shaped mouth;  the deep wisdom within her thoughtful brown eyes.  And still to this day, Icis doesn’t know what caused her to say ok.  She never let others in; especially not a cheerleader.  And that was Lana Isaacs; one of the picture-perfect Barbies that walked around the high schools with it all together.  Their blonde hair perfectly curled, make-up perfectly applied, clothes perfectly matched, and perfect families.  Everything Icis wasn’t.  And the scar running down her face was a daily reminder of that. 

  But something in Lana’s soft brown eyes told Icis something different.  Maybe she had jumped to conclusions and there was more to Lana.

  So she ate with Lana in the dingy school cafeteria;  square cheese pizza and orange soda were their gourmet lunch as they made fun of the other ‘Barbies’.  Lana told her about quitting cheerleading because of how mean those girls were, her struggles with depression, and how her parents were never home; how they preferred being world travelers to parents, oblivious to their daughter’s mental health issues.  How all of those factors had led to a suicide attempt in the 7th grade.    

  Icis talked to her about living in a foster home, her third foster home to be specific.  She spoke about how this was the best home she had been in but she still couldn’t wait to age out at eighteen- to have her own permanent home that no one could take from her.  She would save the juicy details of her other two fosters for a later date; three years to be exact.  

  It was the summer after their senior year and both girls had just turned 18; coincidentally sharing the same June 3rd birthday - Gemini, the sign of the twins.  So they celebrated with matching Gemini tattoos, ornate scrolling Roman numeral two- Lana’s in pink, Icis’s in purple, and three bottles of blue raspberry MD 40/40.  Lana’s parents were out of town, like always, so they barricaded themselves in the enormous theater room with a snack spread of popcorn, candy, and pepperoni pizza.  As they finished the last of the second bottle of potent liquor, Icis found herself telling Lana about her biological parents' car accident that had left her alone at nine.  About Her first foster family who had returned her after six months because they changed their mind. Then there was her mentally unstable second foster mom who had decided that a ten-year-old Icis was flirting with her husband.  No particular reason other than the boyfriend’s perverse tendency to stare at Icis constantly; like a wolf stalking a sheep.  

  But according to her foster mom, Icis was instigating and therefore needed to be brought down a notch as she sliced the side of Icis’s face from temple to jaw.  Icis could still feel the cold steel blade glide through her flesh like softened butter; hear her shrill screams echoing in her ears.  

  Lana hadn’t recoiled in shock or shown pity as Icis explained how she had reached for the knife sitting on the granite countertop and, in a panic, had stabbed her foster mom in her chest to keep her from attacking the other side of her face. The evil woman had spent two weeks recovering but had recovered and was now spending ten years in prison.  Icis was placed with her current foster family; three counties away from her second foster home.

  Lana just sat next to Icis quietly with her blonde hair lightly draped over her slim shoulders and whispered, barely audible, ‘No one will ever hurt you again, ice.  Me and you are soul sisters, and I will not hesitate to slaughter anyone who lays a finger on you.’  Malice dripped from each whispered word; a threatening tone in her normally gentle voice that Icis had never heard before.

  ‘Ditto cabbage head.’  Icis murmured affectionately, an appreciative tear tracing down her right cheek, and effectively breaking the tension with the corny phrase they had said to each other for years.

  At that moment a bond formed between the girls;  a bond of understanding and unconditional love.  And that bond carried them through the years; through college, several relationships, the start of their careers - Lana becoming a CPA and Icis a tattoo artist- and the purchase of their first home- a modest red brick three-bedroom, two-bath house- perfect for the two of them but not too big for one of them to handle if the other ever married or opted to move out.  

  And that's where they were living when Lana received her breast cancer diagnosis; Stage three triple-negative breast cancer.  The doctors started her on aggressive treatments immediately and within three months Lana was bald and frail- hospital bound for months at a time; wheelchair-bound other times.

  But through every treatment, Icis was there holding her hand, cheering her on to keep fighting, holding her hair as she threw up for hours.

  And on that horrible summer night, one year ago, when Lana was weeping because the falling out hair was making her itch incessantly but scratching would shred her fragile skin.  On that night, Icis put clippers to Lana’s head- being careful not to nick her extremely sensitive skin.  Icis watched as tears fell down her best friend’s cheeks- her gorgeous blonde locks collected in a pile on the floor.  It was at that moment that Icis chose to put the clippers to her head too.

  ‘Ice, NO!  You can’t do this! You don’t need to do it for me, I know you’re here for me! Do not shave your beautiful hair because of me.’  Lana sobs as she watches Icis.

  ‘We’re soul sisters; we are in this together. So we will be bald together and we will rock that shit, Together.’  Icis states as her eyes fill with love and that unbreakable bond; the buzzing of the clippers and Lana’s quiet sobs are the only sounds as Icis directed the clippers through her silky black hair, not stopping till her head was completely bald.

  ‘Now we are even more like twins!’  Icis grins as Lana burst into tear-filled laughter, reaching for her friend and hugging her tightly.  ‘I love you Ice.  Thank you for eating pizza with me that day at school.  I don't think you even know how you saved me.’

  ‘But that's the thing; You saved me too.  Since my parents died, no one had ever cared about me.  No one bothered to get to know me; they just assume and kept moving.  I always felt so invisible.  Till you Lana.  Till that day when you actually listened to my story and cared.  I knew that I had someone who cared about me from that day on and It made me believe that I could reach for the stars again. I could dream again because I had someone in my corner, forever.  I love you, sister.’  Icis finishes emphatically.

  And in that moment Lana found the strength she needed to fight the cancer that invaded her body.  She found herself thinking when the treatments became unbearable; I will beat this for my sister.  So she fought with every ounce of strength that their soul tie provided her.  And six months later Lana’s doctors told her, as she sat clutching Icis’s hand in the cold examination room, that the treatments had worked; she was officially in remission.  

  Her latest scan didn't detect any cancer cells, so that would be her final chemo treatment.  Not cancer free yet; it would take five years of cancer-free scans before they were comfortable giving her that title; but she would get to ring that glorious shiny brass bell today signaling yet another battle the friends conquered together.

 ‘Well, I think that since we are celebrating, we should eat out and, if you’re up to it, we could check out the new cabaret on bishop st.  According to Rian, the food is amazing and it has a dance floor.  It’d kill two birds with one stone.’ Icis suggests as she wipes the sweat from her brow, finally catching up to Lana.

  ‘Come on! We only have one more lap.  Then we can get home and get ready. We are supposed to be at St Luke’s by two for the ceremony.’ Lana laughs as she tugs on Icis’s arm playfully.  ‘And yeah I’m good with checking out Mademoiselle! It looks fun!’ She responds as they pass the last curve of their trail.  ‘Is Rian still trying to get you on that date?’  Lana teases as she wiggles her eyebrows at her friend. 

  ‘Yes he’s still trying and you are still my excuse to say it’s not a good time every time.’  Icis laughs.  ‘But I did tell him after we get through the ceremony, I would give him one date to see what I thought.  He’s been consistently badgering me for a year, I guess I can give him one date.’  Icis rolls her eyes playfully.

  ‘I don’t know why you refuse to admit how much you like him.’  Lana chides as a smile tugs at her heart-shaped mouth.  ‘He’s a great guy.’

  ‘Yeah, he is. And the fact that you say it too makes me want to give him a chance. You know how I am with trusting people.’  Icis agrees quietly as they finally reach her black Lexus parked in the side parking lot.

  Later that day as the sun shines brightly overhead, the two friends walk into St Luke cancer center hand in hand.  They cordially greet each of the nurses and the other patients that they had grown so close to over the past year- Hugging and embracing their fellow bell ringers. 

  ‘Tell me not to be afraid Ice.’  Lana whispers as they take their seats in the cozy lounge room.

  ‘What’s there to be afraid of?’  Icis inquires as she tightens her grip on Lana’s clammy hand.

  ‘What if it comes back? What if the doctors are wrong?’  Lana quietly responds, her deep brown eyes shadowing with fear as she looks at her best friend expectingly.

  ‘Then it does.  And we kick its ass together again.  You shouldn’t be afraid, cancer should be afraid of us.  Because together nothing is impossible.  We got this, Bestie.’  Icis stated reassuringly; pulling her friend closer to her side for comfort. 

  ‘I love you Ice.’  Lana murmurs as she nuzzles closer to her friend.

  ‘I love you.’  Icis accedes as she smiles softly;  listening to the musical tintinnabulation of the first bell ring.

  ‘Lana Isaacs.’ A cheerful nurse announces as the room claps unanimously.

  ‘Go ring your bell of triumph, Lana. You deserve it.’  Icis quietly encourages.

  Lana’s smile beams brightly as she makes her way to the shiny brass bell.  ‘Before I ring this I have to say thank you to all of you.  My nurses, my doctors, and my best friend, Ice.  All of you are the reason I’m here and I will forever be in debt to each and every one of you all.  Thank you for fighting with me. And to Ice- we won yet another battle together.  Here’s to many more battles together.’  She tearfully finishes as she sounds the glorious ringing of the bell;  Icis watches with pride as she mouths I love you bestie.