The Voice

The years flew past her as quickly as the leaves change in the fall. Counting time with splashes of green and yellow into shades of red and burnt orange. The interesting thing about change is that it happens whether you choose to acknowledge it or not. Kyla Kats felt like she had been living her entire life under a rock, just recently peering out and noticing just how different everything had become. The sun cascaded down upon her tanned shoulders as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. It was the summer solstice, the longest day of the year and she decided to head to the lake to soak in the beauty of her surroundings. As the pleasant scents of jasmine and lilac danced in the air, the water in front of her glistened. Silence, other than the birds chirping. Kyla spent the better portion of her life searching for meaning but had recently discovered the answers were inside of her all along. She inhaled, slowly and controlled, oxygen filling up her lungs. After the second breath she connected to the source of her joy. The lake began to sway and turn into tv static as the colors became brighter and more pronounced. The flowers towered above her, as tall as the trees, and the sunshine hugged her body with a physical and emotional warmth. Her senses were instantly refined. The grass under her legs felt like velvet.

“You’re back,” a voice whispered in her ear. Kyla smiled. She had achieved connection again.

“I come in gratitude and love, as always. But I am in need of a favor,” Kyla said.

“What is it you ask of my dear?” The voice was calm and kind with a whimsical effect. Kyla hesitated, unsure of how to communicate her feelings properly.

“Well, you see… Ever since I found you, I am different. No one in my life understands me. I try to follow your signs, but they don’t make sense to anyone else. I am starting to feel like I am crazy.”

“Do you think you’re crazy?” The voice asked.

“Well, no… but everyone else does.”

“Yes, but that’s not what I asked you, my dear,” The voice drew out each syllable, trying to enhance the importance of the question. The voice began speaking again before she had time to reply, “Do you think you’re crazy?”

“I know I’m not, but I just need something to show them you’re real,” Kyla stated.

“Interesting,” The voice pondered, “But I’m sorry I don’t think I can provide what you think you need Kyla.”

She was saddened that there would be no tangible proof of this newfound connection she harbored. Wanting to continue the conversation but unsure how, she paused taking another deep breath.

“Look, I trust you, but must I go through so much? Can life not just be easy?”

“I am confused,” The voice began, “have I not always protected you?”

“Well, yes…”

“You must understand that I sharpen the strongest of soldiers through the toughest of battles. Consider your life a gift, instead of a curse.”

Kyla then nodded her head in agreement before offering an apology. For she had no idea just who she was connected to at that moment. Her bones screamed to her that it was light, but years of Catholicism ingrained into her brain sent about whispers of suspicion. Was it possible this was the devil appearing to her neatly gift wrapped as the meaning she so desperately sought?

“I just need some guidance,” Kyla said.

“Do you not see the signs?” The voice asked.

“I see them, and I follow them blindly but sometimes I wonder…” She hesitated, “what exactly am I following?”

“The problem here, is that you still wonder what I am, Kyla”

“Well… how could I not?” She proclaimed, frustrated.

“Look at your life. I have always been there. I have always intervened. You may have gone through struggles, but you are still here, thriving. You, my dear, are my strongest soldier.” The voice said.

“But why me?” Kyla asked.

“This is a question that has many layers, I think you might find the answers you’re looking for with deeper reflection.”

Kyla could sense the presence was getting annoyed with her questions and would soon vanish just as abruptly as it came.

“Before you go, just tell me one thing,” She stated. “I have to know- are you good or evil?”

Silence fell upon Kyla like a blanket, scared to know the truth.

“What do you think I am Kyla?” The voice asked.

“I don’t believe you’re evil…but sometimes it’s hard not to wonder.” Kyla said as her voice shook.

“Do you feel like I lead you into the light? Or into the dark?” Kyla paused as she put some thought into her answer.

“It’s confusing, because at times, you lead me into very dark places, but I always come out on the other side much better. Surely, there must be a way to avoid this all together, no?” The voice laughed,

“In a perfect world, I suppose. What you have described my dear is alchemy and it is why you are given the hardest of battles. It is because you know what to do with the pain.”

“This still doesn’t answer my question,” Kyla stated.

“You already know what I am, dear,” The voice said calmly.

“If I knew what you were I wouldn’t be asking,” Kyla proclaimed with an odd amount of sass for someone who was unaware if she was speaking with the devil. More silence as she sensed the presence slipping through her fingers.

“Please just tell me," She begged.

“If I tell you, how can I trust you will still follow?” Kyla stayed quiet for a moment.

“I give you my word, I will continue to follow you. But I need to know,” She stated. The voice laughed with a benevolent knowing.

“I suppose you do, don’t you?” The voice continued, “Ok, I will tell you- but be aware it may raise more questions than it answers.” Kyla nodded her head in agreement.

“I am you.”