No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

Submitted into Contest #230 in response to: Start your story with someone uttering a very strange sentence.... view prompt

6 comments

Crime Drama Fiction


“Out of all the reasons for my imprisonment, helping one of my honor students shouldn’t have been one of them,” I muttered.

“Bob, you have ten hours and three minutes before meeting your maker!” He chuckled sadistically as he spoke.

Reflecting on my feelings, my jaw tightened at the thought of not missing this jerk.

Twelve years ago, Missy asked for my help. Suddenly, her clothing preferences drastically shifted. Her grades plummeted from A’s to C’s and D’s.

The clanging of the jailer’s cudgel rang out against the bars, waking many on the block. The memory of this sweet girl vanished as I glanced at this miserable excuse for humanity.

“I believe you,” said Steve, my sole confidant. Steve was on death row for killing his wife over using his beer-drinking money on shoes for the kids. He stood by his decision, even in court.

“I’ve accepted it. No one else knows when the bell will toll except us. Seven hours from now, my bell will ring.”

Steve nodded.

“Why do they think you’re responsible?”

“We were seen in my car. I took her to a doctor to find out why she was sick.”

Jerry hit the bars close to Steve's hand. "No talking!" he yelled.

Missy was bright, cute, funny, and full of life until drugs consumed her soul. Still, who would want to harm her? I wondered.

The lunch tray had saliva on the cobbler. The jailer smirked as he wiped drool from his chin. "Only five hours left for you. It’s unfortunate that we no longer electrocute. I want to see you fry!"

I believed he was worse than Missy’s killer. Jerry’s hatred turned our lives into a living hell. Some people deserved it, without a doubt.

Being isolated with Jerry as my tormenter makes death seem preferable.

I could taste Jerry’s chewing tobacco in my food. If I were at fault, this would also be understandable.

My parents had exhausted all their options. The governor ignored them. His daughter was about the same age as Missy. They found a nude body near my farm in the woods, identified as Missy.

Despite my passion for teaching, working the land provided solace. My parents sold my farm to pay for my legal expenses. It was pointless. The judge, who had children, perceived me as a child predator.

I spent 12 years and 45 days in this cell, cut off from books, TV, radio, and the outside world.

At 4 PM, I had an hour to myself in the yard. With only three hours remaining, I longed to feel the sun's warmth one last time.

Raindrops pelted me as Jerry reveled in my misery while opening the door.

Like a kid, I splashed in a puddle I found. I faked having fun.

From under the portico, Jerry watched and thought I had lost it. As I sat on the wet bench, lightning crackled in the distance, and the chilly rain soaked through my clothes.

Maybe I’ll be struck by lightning, fulfilling Jerry’s wish to see me burn.

“The kid you killed might have enjoyed playing in the rain, so why did you do it?”

“These are my last few minutes on this earth, and I tell you, I am innocent.” 

As I spoke, a gentle whistling escaped through my teeth, absent from a time spent in the yard before death row. They saw me as a murderer and rapist of children.

Had it not been for the pain and the blood, I might have clapped at their misguided justice against those who harm children.

He blew his whistle and handed me a diaper, leading me back to my cell. I cocked my head while looking at him.

“We can't allow you to poop on the table, can we?”

If I were guilty, I would be receiving the humiliation I deserved. 

Forty-five minutes remaining, I consoled the old preacher by reaffirming my faith in Jesus.

Keys rattled, and a door clanged, leading to a dark, foreboding hallway. Jerry punched me in the kidney, taking my breath away.

“Stop resisting,” he chuckled.

In a pea-green room, I found a table that looked like a cross ready for me.

The one-way glass to my left, I knew to separate the family. The reflection of a man dressed in blue stared back at me.

I accepted my position and allowed them to strap me in. The throbbing pain in my side distracted me from the needle’s sting.

“Any last words?”

A microphone dangled only inches from my face. I said, “I’m truly sorry for your loss, and I hope my death brings you comfort.”

The acid burned through my arm and then took control of my chest muscles. I was unable to take a breath. The goal was clearly to kill me slowly and painfully instead of quickly and mercifully.

Disregarding protocol, it appeared that Jerry was giving me a send-off. The combination of breathlessness and intense muscle spasms made me desire death.

My body’s reaction to the drugs caused the lights above me to pulsate brilliantly. As the lights slowly dimmed, I felt my limbs convulse against the restraints. Reality faded as a ringing filled my ears.

When I opened my eyes, I found myself outside the green room.

The light shining above me was not of divine origin. There were no constraints on me. I was clearly naked under a sheet.

“What...I stammered”

My crying mother held my hand as the preacher stood nearby.

The dealer/boyfriend struck once more. He confessed in a plea bargain. As the needle was pushed into my vein, the governor became aware of the deal.

He took his time examining all the facts before deciding he should intervene. The call finally connected amidst the raging storm. One minute after my death.

I would have died if Jerry had followed the humane protocol instead of torturing me.

Death Row has a new opening. There were other unsolved cases. Would Missy’s actual killer get to meet Jerry and taste his spittle?

December 22, 2023 22:57

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

6 comments

Aidan Romo
21:24 Jan 03, 2024

What a creatively morose idea for a story and with an appropriate sense of hopelessness throughout. Makes the sudden end of it all the more impactful. Well articulated tale with a solid, surprising subversion.

Reply

Scott Taylor
21:33 Jan 03, 2024

Thanks Aidan. There is a story behind the story. My job out of college took me into many different businesses. That included prisons. I jokingly tell people (for shock value) that I was on Death Row. The looks are priceless. I was an engineer and had to work on equipment wherever it was, including death row. I lead a writing group in Texas. One of the things I stress is you have got to live your life and write from your experiences. Telling stories from something you read or watched on the TV is a rehashing of someone else's life or stuff....

Reply

Aidan Romo
21:45 Jan 03, 2024

That's a good rule to follow, however if done right and with great effort, borrowing or expanding upon a concept or theme from someone else's material can prove to be effective. However, experiences are always a powerful tool that elicits the most impactful and passionate of stories. Thanks for sharing.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Trudy Jas
16:46 Jan 01, 2024

Wow! I felt his helplessness, resignation and dignity.

Reply

Scott Taylor
17:44 Jan 02, 2024

Thanks...wait till you read this week's post...

Reply

Trudy Jas
20:21 Jan 02, 2024

I did. :-) Read the novella I left you.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Reedsy | Default — Editors with Marker | 2024-05

Bring your publishing dreams to life

The world's best editors, designers, and marketers are on Reedsy. Come meet them.