How to Live with an Alcoholic

Marny arrived on the steps of the library out of breath. She looked around and fixed her glasses and hair.  A casual observer would have thought she was on a date rather than escaping to a quiet, mundane place like the public library.

She took a deep breath and walked inside.  The regulars looked at her and shrugged their shoulders; they had never seen the young teen in the place before. Arlene Armstrong, one of the library assistants looked and smiled at her.

Marny returned the smile and then darted away. She floated and flirted with a few sections not really looking for anything. Her ears were ringing from the usual screaming of the battleground that was home. It wasn’t much of a home.

“I am not sure what I am in the mood to read.”

She looked around and there was nobody about.

“When you are talking to yourself, it is considered crazy person stuff.”

She giggled.

“But, when you come from a crazy household then it’s okay to be a little crazy.”

She sighed.

Marny pulled out her phone and looked for new messages. She was about to text her mother when there was a tap on the shoulder.

The young girl turned around. It was that annoying Susan Cornwall from school.

“Hi, Marny, what are you doing here?”

“Looking for underwear,” she said trying to keep a straight face.

“In the library?” Susan almost shouted.

“Shhh, or they’ll kick us out.”

Marny smiled.

“I don’t think you’ll find any underwear in the library.” Susan looked very serious.

“Thanks for the tip. I have to go now.”

“Okay,” said Susan with a worried look on her face.

Marny slipped away and hid in a dark corner laughing uncontrollably.  

“I wish I could laugh at home like this.”

She turned around and found herself in a very strange section.  The titles were about drug abuse and alcoholism.  

There were a lot of kids at school that were users and some even came to class drunk. Marny never did drugs and she had tasted from her father’s whiskey bottle once and it burned all the way down. It was horrible.  

It was her eleventh birthday and he insisted that she take a drink.

“She is only eleven years old.” Her mother was furious.

“I know how old she is.” Her father was about to explode again.

“You want her to turn into a drunk like you?”

He got up knocking the chair down.

Marny started to cry and the usual happened.

Suddenly, a book title jumped out at her. It read: ‘How to Live With An Alcoholic.’

“I live with an alcoholic.”

She grabbed the book and found an empty table and started to read.

The minutes turned into hours and then the kindly library assistant Arlene stood in front of her.

“The library is closing in five minutes.”

Marny pulled out her phone and looked at the time.

“Oh, my God, my mother is going to kill me.”

The young girl took off, stopped, grabbed the book and ran away.

“You have to sign that out. You just can’t take it with you.”

Marny stopped all in a panic.

“I don’t have a library card.”

“It will only take a couple of minutes to apply for one.”

“Could I come back tomorrow and do this?”

“Sure.”

“Can I reserve a book?”

“You need a library card for that.”

Marny looked defeated.

She looked at the title and the author studying them closely and smiled.

“You only lend books out right?”

“Yes, that is why we call it a library.”

“I will need it for more than two weeks. I’ll just buy a copy.”

She handed Arlene the book and ran off.

II

The next day, she bumped into Susan.

“Hi, Marny, did you enjoy your visit at the library?”

“It was okay. I found the cutest pair of underwear in the clothes section on the second floor.”

Marny walked away leaving poor Susan perplexed as usual.

Later that day, she went to the mall and locked up her bike. The lock was cheap, but it was all she could afford. In fact, she had traded Jason Rogers a chocolate bar for it.

“Please make sure nobody steals my bike. The last time it was stolen, my butt hurt for a week after the punishment.”

She slipped inside and headed to the bookstore.  

There were thousands of books and she looked around time pressuring her every movement.

She spotted a clerk and nearly ran him over.

“Hello, I was hoping that you could help me out.  I am looking for a book entitled ‘How to Live With An Alcoholic.’”

Stan the clerk smiled.

“We don’t have any copies left. We can order one, but it might take several weeks before it comes in.”

“Thanks.”

She darted out and made it to her bicycle as someone was standing over it.

“Hey, creep, can I help you?”

The guy looked like he was homeless. 

“That’s my bike, not yours so buzz off.”

“Sure, it is.”

She picked the lock and rode off leaving him standing there muttering to himself.

“Just when you think you have it really bad there is always someone worse than you.”

She returned to the library.

“Hello, there,” said Arlene.

“Hello, I am back for that book.”

“It should be in the same place.”

Marny couldn’t remember where she had found it in the first place.  The young girl waltzed around and finally located it. But, it was gone.

“Oh, come on, can’t I ever catch a break?”

She was despondent. Marny ran her fingers across the spines of several books but none were the one until she saw it. Whoever had put it back on the shelf had returned it in the wrong place.

She clutched it to her bosom and smiled.

She read it for a while keeping an eye on the time so she wouldn’t repeat the same scenario of last night. Hopefully, her father would be snoring asleep like he had the night before when she ran into the house in an ultimate panic.

She arrived home that night and read the book some more.

Her father was out and when he came home he was drunk. Her mother was at work.

“Where is everyone? I come home from a hard day’s work (he was unemployed) and nobody is home to greet me.”

“I hope this author knows what they are talking about.”

She popped out and threw her best smile his way.

“Hey, dad, your little princess is right here.”

He turned around and his smile melted a little bit.

“What were you doing?  Where you doing something bad? Because if you were, I’m gonna teach you a lesson you’ll never forget little girl.”

“Dad, I was doing homework. All those teachers know is how to give us homework.”

“Yeah, well, don’t do it.”  He laughed and she laughed along.

“But, daddy, if I don’t do homework, I will fail my classes. You don’t want that do you?”

He thought about it for a while, but the alcohol fog that drenched his brain was too much.  

“You’re right. That lousy cook leave something for us to eat?”

“I am not sure, dad. I’ll check.”

As usual, there was nothing in the fridge and the cupboards were bare.

“Nope, no food in the place,” Marny sighed.

“She is a lousy cook anyway.  Come on, let’s go, I guess supper is on me.”

When he was drunk, he insisted on driving.  There were countless times that she and her mother had walked or taken a cab refusing to get in the car.

“It is one thing for him to go out alone, but it is another to take one or both of us with him.”

He looked for his keys and couldn’t find them.  She had swiftly taken them and stuffed them in her pocket.

“Can’t find the keys.”

“I could go and get supper on my bike?”

“Okay.  Be careful.”

He handed her a ten spot that was not going to cover the whole meal and walked back in the house to get another drink.

She bought him supper, but didn’t eat herself. There wasn’t enough money.

There would be more tough times down the road, but she managed to live on his more gentle side.

When the book was due, Marny returned to the library and sought out Arlene.

“I’m really sorry, but I lost the book.”

“That is okay.  The book cost fifteen dollars.”

Arlene took the money out of her pocket and then proceeded to take Marny’s name off the overdue list.

“All is set. Enjoy the book.”

Marny smiled.

“Thank you.” She hugged Arlene.

The next few years crept by slowly one agonizing day at a time. But, the book had a huge impact on how to deal with her abusive, alcoholic father.  

She understood why he was an alcoholic and going to the root of the problem was a tremendous help.  

When she was seventeen, he got in a serious car accident. He was drunk. Thankfully, the man had not hurt anyone only himself.  Marny spent long hours at the hospital by his side faithfully.  He had a violent temper and was very obnoxious, but he was still her dad.

Once, he was better, she worked up the courage to ask him a question.

“Dad, why don’t you quit drinking? They offer help and-

He roared like a lion. “I am not an alcoholic and don’t you ever accuse me of being one.”

He had cornered the frightened girl and was yelling in her face. She was terrified he would hit her like he had her mother so many times. But, he didn’t. Instead, he walked away and had another beer.

Marny knew that setting up an intervention or trying to get him into AA meetings was utterly impossible.  

If anything, the book showed her how to find his soft spot and avoid the angry zone.

Marny utilized the techniques of listening and not judging. She never offered money when he asked for it. At fifteen, she started working part-time as a cashier at the local supermarket.  

One time he asked her.

“How come you don’t ever have any money when I ask for some?”

“Well, I help mom out to pay the rent and buy food.”

He looked hurt.

“I guess so.”

She always wondered where he got the money to drink in the first place. He rarely worked and when his welfare check came in it was usually gone in a couple of days.

It was not easy growing up, but Marny eventually graduated from high school. She wasn’t top of her class. It was hard juggling full-time school and a demanding job.

One day, she was off to college and away from the nightmare.

Marny graduated from college with a degree in psychology and became a renown speaker touring the country and teaching people about the importance of libraries and their contents.