Rascals: beautiful cocktails for beautiful people
Rachel started giggling as she passed the ridiculous sign on the coolest new bar in the coolest part of Oxford. She couldn’t believe she’d agreed to go there that night.
‘Seriously, how obnoxious. I could write something better than that.’
The Benny Hill theme tune started ringing on her phone.
‘Hello Benny’
‘Who? Is that the name of your latest conquest?’
She couldn’t help but giggle…it didn’t take long for her friend Chris to get on to the subject of sex with her.
‘Hello Christopher, how can I help you sir?’
‘Ooh so formal, I love it. Where are you?’
‘Just heading home with something hot to wear this evening.’
‘Stop it…I'll have to come up there to spank your lovely bottom in a bit.’
‘Chris, what do you want?’
‘Oh, I was just wondering if you were free next weekend and if you were coming to the reunion in Bristol?’
‘Yes and yes. I said to Rory I was coming. Aren’t we going paintballing and then out to some dive? Sounds great!’
‘Look gorgeous I’ve got to go. I’m going to Capoeira classes later in Fulham. Sounds awful but I’m hoping if I go, Lottie will let me go to third base later.’
‘Seriously, you are ridiculous and completely juvenile. Ciao for now.’
‘Yep, I know gorgeous, ciao for now Bella.’
Rachel always felt a bit flush and excitable after speaking to Chris. She had first met him on a punt one Saturday afternoon while drinking Pimm's and trying not to fall in the river with her ex- boyfriend, Luke. Chris and Luke had struck it off immediately at College in Oxford. Chris was incredibly smart, winning all the awards each year for best in his field, biology. It always entertained her that Chris was an expert in anatomy on the page but seemed to have had a string of completely hilarious encounters with the opposite sex. After graduating he had buggered off to Africa for a bit to be a safari guide and after two years smoking weed and sleeping with Hollywood B-listers who frequented his glamorous camp, he came back to reality, after quite a bit of pressure from his parents who kept saying ‘we haven’t sent you to Wellington and Oxford so you can bum around Africa for the rest of your days’. He thought that had been harsh at first but then agreed, came back to London, got an MA in finance and then started work in the city. Despite having a very stressful job now, Chris was always light with her but Rach felt a dark cloud seemed to move around with him wherever he went.
Chris was always complimentary, always commenting on her ‘nice arse’ and asking inappropriate questions such as:
‘Rach, if you and I were going to hook up later, what position would you like us to start with?’
She now felt completely distracted and almost had to remind herself that she was single and for now, the only chance of meeting Mr Darcy, was to get dressed up to the nines and present her lovely derrier to some suitable bachelor at Rascals.
She meandered home past the funky bars in Jericho, through the busy Saturday shoppers, past Christ Church college, all the way to the end of the Abingdon road.
She kept thinking about what her strapline for Rascals would be:
The beautiful bar for beautiful people…too cheesy…
Beautiful cocktails, from dusk till dawn…sounds like an Antonio Banderas film…
Rascals: beautiful cocktails with the right amount of naughty…sounds like a Kenny Everett sketch….
As she popped the key into the door of her rather sad looking terraced house on the Abingdon Road, she remembered the real reason she had agreed to live here. ‘It’s bloody cheap.’ She frequently told people. She wouldn’t find anything else for two hundred quid a month and cheap rent left her with plenty for shopping and cocktails. Her landlady was totally inappropriate, and, on several occasions, she had caught her walking into the house unannounced to conduct some sort of military inspection, but Rach just put up with it.
She heard what sounded like two excited puppies running to the door. If only it was something so cute. No it was just her excitable housemates, Tim and Matt.
‘Mummy’s home’ she said trying not to laugh.
Tim, who towered above her approached with a goofy expression and something red and lumpy on a spoon.
‘Guten abend Timothy’
‘Bonjour Mademoiselle. This evening, I have the Bolognese with Tim’s special ingredient’.
‘I don’t want to know that includes, do I?’
Tim was an adorable 6ft4, german architect with a passion for athletics , designing fonts and experimenting in the kitchen. His last experiment involved adding snails from the garden and god knows what else in a salad which he offered to Rachel and Matthew one evening.
‘Would you like to taste?’
‘Mmm, maybe later Tim. I better get ready as Libby will be here in a bit’.
‘Ooh the lovely Libby’ Tim was almost dribbling with excitement.
‘indeed, the lovely Libby’
‘Is she still single?’
Matt bounced into the kitchen like an excitable tigger.
‘Ooh is Libby single? She's so pretty.’
‘She is indeed. Right, I had better get ready.
‘Where are you off to? Can we come? Double date?
‘No. no double date. Ever. Right I’m heading upstairs.
Tim turned to Matt and suggested they play some violent war game on his computer, and they headed off chatting excitedly about who was going to win this time.
Upstairs, Rachel stared at herself for a moment and thought about all the times her ex, Luke had asked why she was wearing so much make up before heading out. He never complimented her and always bought her huge, frumpy items of clothing which she refused to wear. On one occasion they went out and Rachel felt obliged to wear an enormous dress which just hung off her. Their mutual friends had said ‘what the hell are you wearing Rach? We can't see your lovely bottom in that’. And there in lay the reason. Luke knew how many of their mutual male friends felt about her and he couldn’t bear it.
‘What a relief I don’t need to get his approval before heading out.’
She applied a delicate stroke of black eyeliner to her large green eyes. Sat at her ancient dressing table which belonged to her ancient landlady, she slowly pulled out a drawer completely stuffed with make up which probably should have been binned years ago, but she liked the smell and the association with certain items. When she was feeling slightly shy, she would apply a very demure Cappucino- colored lipstick but this evening she felt a bit more playful and confident so she’d go for a brighter shade. Maybe something a bit more glossy.
As she stared into the mirror, admiring her curly auburn hair, a text came through from her friend Libby.
‘I’ll be there in 30. Hope the wine is chilling 😊’
Libby couldn’t be more different to Rachel’s other friends. She was female to start with and excruciatingly shy. When they first started working together at Radcliffe publishing on an Industrial park 20 miles outside of Oxford, she had certainly noticed Libby as most people did. With the height and figure of a catwalk model and soft feline features, she seemed to attract the attention of most males in the office. When Rachel’s manager had suggested Libby shadow her to learn more about commissioning, she had seemed painfully reserved and yet as time went on, Rachel noticed she was always at the centre of any social event or after work drinks so surely she had a bit more substance?!
When Rachel had finally called it quits with Luke, she found herself offloading on Libby all the time . Their relationship went from the occasional chats and coffee at work to Libby coming over for dinner three times a week and then both of them spending most of their weekends together. She almost felt like she had gained a new sister which was of great comfort.
Libby had been on a handful of dates with friends of friends but nothing had amounted to anything. She kept saying to Rachel:
‘I just can’t be bothered if they can’t be bothered.’
‘I know what you mean but if you don’t show people what you have to offer, how will they know?’
‘you’re so sweet Rachel’
‘Knock knock’
‘Aah Libby, I didn’t hear you at the door. Sorry did Tim and Matt dribble on you?
‘Ha, no…I grabbed the wine from downstairs? Hope it was yours…’
‘Perfect. Cheers! Here’s to a fab night of music, cocktails and beautiful people.’
‘cheers! I’m actually feeling a bit nervous, I don’t know why?!’
As they pulled up outside Rascals, quite a queue had formed. It wasn’t a large space and word had got round that a DJ from LA was playing a set this evening.
When they finally got through the door, slightly blustered and with leaves at their feet, they couldn’t stop giggling which caught the attention of most people in the room who saw these two attractive ladies enjoying each other’s company. They looked as if they could be anywhere and didn’t really care as long as they were together. Rachel did notice one cheeky looking chap who was looking over at her. ‘Mmm, so the sign outside wasn’t lying.’
Moving up to the bar, Rachel pulled out a note and said to the incredibly handsome but very young looking barman:
‘I’m sure you get this a lot but please may I have two long comfortable screws please?
Libby blushed and looked at the floor.
Rachel led them to a very cosy cove in a dark corner at the back of the bar but made sure there were a couple of seats in front of them should they wish to welcome guests.
‘I love your top and your earrings are amazing’. Libby had an excellent eye for accessories and these looked like something from Dynasty or Dallas.
‘oh thank you, this cocktail is delicious. I had better pace myself as I don’t think it’ll take a lot to feel tipsy .
‘I know, look at the menu…I like the idea of a pink fizz.’
They hardly noticed a chap approach and sit down opposite them.
He reached out to shake both their hands but his eyes were firmly fixed on Rachel.
‘Hi, I’m Will. It’s a pleasure to meet you both’
‘It’s a pleasure Will. I’m Rachel and this is my friend Libby.
‘Would you mind if I invite a friend over here?
‘Of course, please do.’
As he went up to the bar to speak to another very tall handsome chap, Libby said
‘Rachel, seriously, how do you do it? You’re just so breezy about all of this stuff.’
‘I don’t know, I think being surrounded by two burly brothers who played lots of rugby, spending time at rugby clubs and spending time in male company at school and college has toughened me up. Anyway, you don’t need to worry. You look like a catwalk model, you’re always chatting to chaps at work. Lets just enjoy the entertainment.’
‘Hello ladies, this is my friend Rob. Rob this is beautiful Rachel and Libby.’
‘oh you are smooth Will. Nice to meet you Rob. Please do take a pew and relax.’
With that they ordered another round of cocktails. ‘mojitos all round’ Will requested from the waitress who was also a knock out.
Rob started chatting to Libby while Will and Rachel couldn’t contain their enjoyment of each others conversation. Will was an excellent flirt and Rachel was very impressed as he moved his chair closer to her and started to lean in in a conspiratorial way.
‘So you say you’re a doctor Will. What’s your speciality then?’
‘ I’m a gynaecologist.’
‘ so you fanny around all day?’
‘I’ve never that one before gorgeous.’
‘Sorry that was cheap. Do you enjoy what you do?’
‘Well yes I love it. It’s tough of course but also amazingly rewarding. Tell me more about you..’
Rachel was very conscious that the conversation next to her was not going as well.
‘any holidays planned then?’ Rob sounded liked he’d run out of questions.
‘No nothing. You? Libby answered with a tired expression.
With that Rachel intervened . How about Libby and I head to the bar and bring you boys something strong?’
‘What’s going on sweetie?’
‘I’m just not feeling it.’
‘but he’s absolutely gorgeous. Doctor, prospects and have you seen those biceps?’
‘Yeah I suppose.’
‘Look, why don’t we all have a chat together?’
‘Sure.’
‘Hello boys, here is Caipirinha guaranteed to knock you out.’
‘Well I hope it doesn’t completely knock me out, I’d love to have plenty of energy for later.’ Will added as Rachel felt a hand on her knee.
‘so Rob, have you travelled much? Any plans for future travel?
‘Well when I’ve finished my placement in Oxford, I’m hoping to head to Australia. Plenty of opportunities for doctors there and the conditions are better.
‘Wow that sounds interesting, doesn’t it Libby? Libby, didn’t you say you’d always wanted to go to Australia?’
‘I may have done…a long time ago.’
Rachel felt she had to keep the momentum going but luckily Rob picked up on her desperation.
‘so Libby, how long have you been working in publishing?’
‘just a couple of years.’
‘Great, is that where you met Rachel?’
Rachel felt just about ready to stick pins in her eyes. Why was Libby being so dull? Here were two hot chaps who were clearly smart. Why couldn’t they just have a bit of fun? She felt Libby was shutting any conversation down and ruining any chances she may have to connect with Will.
Rachel got up and headed to the ladies and as she looked into the mirror, she was quite surprised to see Will sneak in behind her.
‘oh hello you’ he said moving his hands to her face and kissing her for what felt like the longest time before moving his hands up her dress.
‘you better get out of here, before you get removed.
‘listen why don’t we get out of here.’
‘I would love to but I can’t. Libby is staying the night.’
‘I could come and join you after she goes to sleep. Read you a bedtime story.’
’ I would love that but what about another night?’
’oh ok gorgeous’
In the taxi back home that evening, both girls were quiet and Rachel couldn’t help but think they may have reached the end of their road together.
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