As I stood on line at my local coffee shop waiting to talk to the barista that I’ve been crushing on for the past year and a half my stomach had been doing somersaults. I came into this coffee shop almost every morning for my fave caramel latte and blueberry muffin. I also hoped for the chance to see Tyler. He had the bluest eyes I had ever seen. They were like small pools of water and I always found myself drowning in them.
The line was typical for a Tuesday morning and I don’t know why I expected it to be any different just because it was New Year’s Eve. But none the less here I stood, waiting. I glanced around the line to see how many people were in front of me while I convinced myself over and over that I could do this. Just be calm and ask him, the worse that could happen is he says no. Just be casual.
Ten people ahead of me. Ok I got this I thought as I rehearsed my practiced speech in my head over and over. I listened to him make small talk with the paying customers and shout out orders to the crew behind him. He was so good at his job. Sometimes I would come in here and just watch him work while I hid behind a book and sipped my latte. Of course our conversations never went passed the amount of time it would take to place my order and pay.
Nine people ahead of me. I don’t know why I let Nicole and Justin talk me into this but I was determined to get it done. I swiveled my neck to look out of the large picturesque window for my two best friends, each giving me a cheesy smile and double thumbs up. Oh gosh I needed new friends.
Eight people ahead of me. I could feel my palms begin to moisten as I inched closer to the counter. His voice a smooth velvet amongst the commotion of people moving in and out of the busy coffee shop. I couldn’t see all of him from where I stood but every so often I got a glimpse of his perfect smile and hypnotic eyes.
Seven people ahead of me. My stomach is slowly rising up into my throat and I’m beginning to feel sick. I don’t know if I can do this. I rub my hands down the front of my dark blue denims in an attempt to remove the moisture forming on them. My selected outfit, an intentional choice of course, put together with the hopes of getting and keeping his attention. My jeans fit snuggly on my toned thighs and defined bottom whereas my white silk camisole top, paired with a cute black blazer, draped loosely from my ample breasts. I could feel my nipples begin to harden through the silk fabric of my bra.
Six people ahead of me. I rehearsed my lines again in my head, the way I went over it with Nicole last night. It seemed so easy then. In the comfort of my bedroom, standing in front of my mirror, I felt as though I could do it confidently. Not I’m not so sure.
Four people ahead of me. Dammit, I hated it when people stood on line taking up space just to stand with someone who is actually ordering. My heart began to thump quickly in my chest. I felt the quick thump thump coursing through my body. I was counting on that fifth person to buy me some time, even if only a minute or two.
Three people ahead of me. The adrenaline was coursing through my body and I had no idea whether it was going to cause me to fight or flight. I turned back looking for my friends and sure enough there they stood motioning me forward. How am I going to do this? He could have a girlfriend, or he could be gay, or even worse I just might not be his type
Two people ahead of me. I was able to see him better now. His low cut dark brown hair, clear skin, beautiful smile and lets not forget the oceans he called eyes. Just then he looked out into the line and our eyes connected for the briefest of seconds and my heart skipped a beat. He smiled at me and then returned his attention to the woman trying to decide between a plain bagel or an onion bagel.
One person ahead of me. Please take your time I thought nervously. My mouth began to feel so dry, my throat tight and my head dizzy. I’ve never asked a guy out before, let alone a guy I barely knew. He’s going to reject me I thought. I’m going to be so embarrassed in front of this whole coffee shop and then I’ll never be able to come back and get my favorite latte and blueberry muffin.
It’s showtime! I step up to the counter and get lost in his eyes and smile. I barely hear the words come out of his mouth as he greets me. “Morning” I reply in a little more than a whisper. “What can I get for you this morning?” He asks smiling down at me. I open my mouth and close it, then open it again only to close it. I forgot my speech. It was supposed to be casual, no big deal and now nothing.
I turn my head looking out the window at my friends. Nicole stood there with her palms together, hands placed in front of her mouth as if she was praying I didn’t blow it. Justin just watched with wide eyes and a pained look on his face. I turn back to Tyler as he asks me if I want my usual, I nod my head. I’m blowing it. Blowing it big time! He begins to enter my order onto the touch screen register as I clear my throat. It’s now or never. He tells me my total and I hand him my twenty dollar bill. I take a deep breath and count down in my head as I attempt to calm my nerves.
Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. Four. Three. Two. One...
He reaches over the register and hands me my change. “Thanks for coming.” He says casually with a wide smile showing his sparkling white teeth. I smile back and walk to the side to wait for my order. I refuse to turn to look at my friends, afraid to see the look of disappointment that was sure to be there. I blew it.
Just as I look down at the phone in my hand I hear a smooth velvet voice calling my name. “Chelsea. Caramel mocha latte and blueberry muffin toasted with butter for Chelsea.” I look and my eyes connect with Tyler’s. They must have rotated him off the register.
I walk to the counter to grab my drink and bag holding my muffin. This is it, I’m getting a second chance. “Have a great day and a happy new year.” He says to me as he hands me my items. My fingers lightly brush against his and a wave of heat flows through my body. He looks at me as though he felt it too and we stand there with our eyes locked on one another.
“Happy new year to you as well.” I say breaking the moment. Tyler smiles and turns to walk away when I call him back to me before I have time to think about it. “Hey I know it’s pretty last minute but I was wondering if you were doing anything tonight? My friends and I are having a small gathering at our apartment to bring in the new year and if you’re not busy or don’t have any plans then maybe you could come over?” I say in a rambled rush. As the silence falls between us I’m tempted to tell him to just forget it when he smiles wide and says he’d love to come.
His reply catches me off guard and I’m not sure I heard him correctly. “Yeah?” I ask. “Yeah.” He says. I quickly take out a piece of paper from my bag and scribble down my name, number and address. “This is the address, I put my number down also in case you have questions or need to cancel just text me to let me know.” I say in a calm tone that is opposite of what I’m actually feeling. He grabs the paper, looks it over, folds it neatly and slides it into the front pocket of his black jeans.
“What time should I be there?” He asks as other people are handing out orders around him. “It starts at 9ish but anytime you get there is fine.” I smile up at him as he smiles at me. “Ok. See you at 9.” He says. I grab my things and turn to walk out, feeling excited and as though I was floating.
“Hey.” Tyler calls to me. I turn back to him, a huge smile on my face. “Is it okay if I bring someone?” He asks, and my heart dropped into my stomach and shattered. I could feel the smile fading from my face. “Umm, yeah. Sure. The more the merrier.” I say trying not to show the disappointment I felt. “Cool. See you soon.” He says before turning and walking towards the busy front counter.
I leave the coffee shop feeling defeated as I walk towards Nicole and Justin. They both stare at me with hopeful looks in their eyes. I tell them what happened as we make our way back to the apartment to prepare for this evening.
“Just because he’s bringing someone doesn’t mean it’s a girlfriend.” Nicole says as we stand in the kitchen prepping hors d’ouiveres and placing them neatly on serving plates. I shrug and continue what I’m doing. Justin walks into the apartment carrying three black bags in his hands full of bottles of alcohol. “We have wine, both red and white. White and dark liquor. And last but not least champagne for midnight toasting.” He says with giddiness in his voice.
“Are you ladies almost done? It’s already seven and people are due to start arriving soon. You know it takes you both forever to get ready.” He says with mock annoyance. “Just about done.” Nicole says as she starts placing trays of food onto the table in a neat arrangement. I wash my hands and dry them on the kitchen towel not really looking forward to the party any more.
“Well I guess I’ll go finish getting ready then.” I say as I make my way out of the kitchen into the living room where Nicole and Justin stood. “It’ll be ok love.” Justin says as he rubs my arm in a soothing manner. “If he does show up with a girl it’s not gonna matter because you still overcame your fear. Besides no one he brings is even gonna compare to you. You are beautiful and are gonna look hot as hell in that red dress tonight” he says while fanning himself. Nicole nods her head in agreement with a goofy look on her face that makes me chuckle.
“Now go get ready and bring sexy back.” Nicole says while making a shooing motion towards me. “Alright I’m going.” I say happily as I feel my mood shift. So what if he brings a girlfriend, I’m still proud that I had the courage to ask I think as I walk down the hall to my bedroom.
By the time I’m finished styling my long hair into big curls that frame my face, applying my full face of makeup and sliding into my little red dress it’s almost twenty mins after 9. I walk out of my room into the hallway where the lights are dim, the music is blaring from the speakers and a few people are standing around talking, eating and drinking. I walk over to Nicole who is wearing a sexy short sequins black dress and black stiletto heels. Her hair is blown out straight and falls in layers down her back. I grab her arm and she turns from the counter where she was reorganizing the food trays.
“Oh my gosh Chelsea you look amazing! Tyler is going to die when he sees you.” She says as she hugs me. “Thanks, you look great too.” I say, trying to fight the nerves building up in me. I look around to see if I see Tyler when Nicole turns me towards her and informs me that he’s not here yet. I see Justin on the other side of the room doing what he does best, being an awesome host. He looks at me and fans himself while mouthing the word hot. I roll my eyes and smile at him and blow him a kiss.
I fix myself a small plate to eat before making myself a drink. I need something to calm my nerves. It’s now almost 11pm, still no Tyler, no phone call or text from him either. I’m seated on one of our couches while our guests are dancing to the music, holding animated conversations, drinking and just having an all around good time. I’m currently on drink number four and I can feel the liquor tingling through my system. I see Justin and Nicole walking towards me and I look down at my phone as if that is going to stop them.
“Hey Chels, come dance with us.” Justin says. “No thanks.” I say plastering a huge fake smile onto my face. “Come hang with us, we hate you sitting over here by yourself. It’s a celebration. We made it through all of the craziness of the year, you especially.” Nicole says while rubbing my back. I nod my head and slowly stand to my feet. We make our way to the designated dance floor and start dancing along with everyone else.
Although I’m having a great time I can’t stop my mind from wandering to Tyler and why he didn’t show up or text me to let me know he wasn’t coming. I check my phone and it’s a quarter to midnight. Justin turns down the music and announces that it’s time to pass out the champagne. I take this as my opportunity to quickly use the bathroom. I walk down the hall and into my bedroom. I toss my phone onto the bed and cross the room to the attached bathroom. Carefully I hike up my dress and relieve myself with a sigh as all the alcohol I’ve consumed flows out of me.
I finish my business in the bathroom, check my makeup, and smooth out my dress before leaving the room. I walk back into the living room and grab a glass of champagne as Justin begins his speech. I check the time display on the tv where the annual NYE show is on with celebrity performers and Times Square in the background. Just under 10 minutes before the ball drops.
I take another quick glance around the room checking for Tyler with no luck. I sigh and focus my attention back on Justin who is coming to the end of his funny yet motivating speech. Nicole has her arm around my waist as I lean and rest my head on her shoulder. I’m so grateful for these two amazing people in my life.
Justin finishes his speech and we all clap and cheer before taking a drink from our glasses. I glance back at the tv to see it’s less than five minutes left. I give myself a slight shrug when I suddenly feel big warm hands on my shoulder. I turn around only to find myself staring into Tyler’s blue ocean eyes. “Hey, sorry I’m late.” He speaks into my ear, his lips brushing across my skin sending burning heat and an icy shiver through me. “My friend Nick wasn’t trying to leave the house tonight because he’s in a bit of a funk.” He continues.
I’m relieved when I realize that his plus one was actually a friend. He smiles down at me while his hand is now resting on my arm. “It’s cool. I’m just glad you could make it.” I say. Our eyes lock and my heart begins to thump out of my chest. I watch as his eyes grazes over every inch of my body, stopping for a few extra seconds on my breasts. My core begins to warm at this. “You look amazing he says as he brings himself closer to me. His 6’4 frame envelops my tiny 5’2 frame nicely.
I get lost in his deep blue eyes as they slowly transform from calm blue waters to dark pools of desire. His hands rest low on my exposed back as our bodies slowly start to mold into one another. I can feel his erection straining against his pants, pressing low against my belly. I instantly feel myself become wet as the lust in my eyes match his. I want him and there’s no doubt in my mind that he wants me.
He leans in to me more, eyes locked on mine, silently asking his question when everyone begins the countdown. “Fifteen” he smells amazing. “Fourteen” his mouth is sexy. “Thirteen” I can’t wait to taste him. “Twelve” they yell. “Eleven” he slowly lowers his lips towards my waiting mouth. I’m wrapped up in time and space with him and nothing else matters.
Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one!
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