Non-Kill Nightmares

Dear Mommy (I’m close to Mommy and Mommy doesn’t always understand me, so I’ll call my diary, Mommy, the same way Anne Frank callee her diary, Kitty),

    Today was scary.  I’m back at the no kill pound. See, my daddy brought me here to meet somebody, but I . .  .No wait, I’m going too fast.   Let’s start at the beginning.  

     See, I’ve had three mommies; 4 if you include my biological mommy.  So, my first mommy was a fat white lady who wore corse sweaters, P J pants, slippers, lipstic, and ear muffs.  She got me from a breeder and I went to my first family.  I loved my first family.  My first mommy took me on walks and she’d walk slow and talk to me.   She’d say things like good dog and talk about the president of the E E U U the weather, the ICE, and tell me to go to el bano.  But, this lady, Sue, had her daughter, Francesco, and Francisco’ son, Frank, living with her.  Francisco was pregnant with Bob then, but he’d come a few months later.  

     But, when Sue was busy or tired or both, I’d sit on the coach with Frank and he’d play S N E S (Super Nintendo Entertainment Syste) and I’d sit next to him and watch the TV, while Francesco’d cook things like pork n’ beans, burgers n’ fries, fish n’ chips, or other yummy food.   They’d accidentally drop food sometimes and I’d lick it up.   I love meat, yam, milk bones, and Jewish crackers the best.  

     Francesco also potty trained me, taught me to sit, and roll over  But, they stayed around me, watched TV with me, and laugh, and laugh and life was good.  

    Then, though, Francisco had Bob, which was good.  I liked Bob, even though they played with him a bit more and played with me a bit less.   But then, Sue and Francesco got into a fight about money, yelled loud, and Sue, me, and some suitcases and boxes had to move out.  I love Sue, but miss Francesco, Frank, and Bob.  But, then, the place Sue moved to, said it was a no pets apartment complex.  Sue cried, argued, even threatened the land-lord, but then my mommy did something bad:   Sue made me live with her son, Mark.   Now, Mark was supposedly a good man, but he had a full-time job as a business manager, so he left me alone for eight hours at a time.  He’d walk me before he left and when he got home, he’d feed me, give me fresh water, but I missed my family, so I started doing mean things, so he’d stay home and play with me:   Thing like going potty in the house, digging up the carpet, whining all day, so the neighbors’d feel bad and complain.  I’d eat furniture.   My plan backfired though.  Instead of staying home and playing with me, he sent me to a no kill shelter with a lot of other dogs and bought me a strange jersey.   He told them I was 3 years old.  I barked 8 times, so they’d know I was 8.  But no one understood.  Then, during the day, certain women would play with me, but they’d leave me alone with other dogs and no humans all night.  Night is the scariest time.  I miss my humans, except Sue’s son.  

     People sometimes came in, though, and sat with me in a private room.  I liked that.  They’d pet me, play with me, and give me treats, but then they’d leave.  I hate this place.  I can’t sleep here, ‘cause I have no family anymore.  I miss my family. 

     Then, these 3 weirdos came in, but they pet me, so I showed them my tummy, to show them I was weak.  Then, though, they left too.  So I thought to myself, I’m probably going to stay in this no kill shelter til the day I die.  

     A week later, though, the weirdos came back and took me to a vet.  I hate vets.   They stick cold sticks up my butt.  But the vet said I wasn’t 3, I was 7.  I barked 8 times.  I’m 8 people:  8.  He also said I had bad teeth.   So, the vet put me under and brushed my teeth.  Two teeth fell out when he did this.  

     Then, though, I lived with my new master, Jade, in his apartment, but Jade went out too.  So I whined and dug, but then Jade had me looked at by two ladies in 3 different places.  Then, the ladies gave Jade a heart, which he put on my collar, and took me to his workplace, where old people pet me.   Is this my new family?   Maybe?   Maybe this is my new family.  Maybe. 

    So, I decided this was my family and I decided to protect my new family.  Any time anyone went past the door, I’d bark my head off, but Jack kept yelling at me and telling me I was a therapy dog, not a guard dog.  Sometimes, there’d be an old person who’d sit on the couch and watch TV with me.   That was my favorite   

      Then, though, Jade had a woman over who really wanted to care for me and love me the way Sue and Jacqueline had, so I looked at Jade with my dog eyes and asked him if was ok for this woman to love me and thankfully he said yes, it was, as long as I didn’t bite her.   She spent weeks petting me and letting me set boundaries with her, like where it’s ok to pet me and where it’s not.  I started acting normal again and was a normal dog again and for a little bit, I could sleep again, but now Jade brought me back to the no kill dog shelter and I miss my new mommy, but Jacqueline, Frank and Bob are there and pet me.   Am I going back with them or are they leaving me at the kennel too, like last time?   Then, though, Jade takes me back home and tells his girlfriend where we’d been.  The new girlfriend says Daddy shouldn’t have done that, and comforts me.  When I close my eyes, though, I still feel abandoned at the no killer shelter.  I wake up and Mommy comforts me, but I can’t sleep well for weeks.  What if this family abandons me too and I wind back at the shelter?  I think about it ever night. They’re my Non-Kill Nightmares.

Love,

Little Friar.