Submitted to: Contest #305

LOOK BEFORE YOU mess it up!

Written in response to: "At the intersection, I could go right and head home — but turning left would take me..."

Adventure Contemporary Creative Nonfiction

This story contains sensitive content

LOOK BEFORE YOU “mess it up”!

4:-‘At the intersection, I could go right and head home—but turning left would take me….’

“into a brick wall, but why did I do it, why didn’t I look before I

turned left,

because this has been my wife’s favourite car, and she’s going

to feel so bereft,

Somebody built a wall there now, which wasn’t there ten

years ago’,

and although the car still drives- ‘it’s buckled and it’s slow”!

She might not care about the carnage, and I hope to hear her

say-

“I don’t care about the damage dear, so long as you’re okay”!

But I won’t hear that, and instead I’ll hear “you clumsy ass’,

haven’t you got a working brain….

your moronic actions are driving me insane”!

“Was something in your eyes, didn’t you see that great big wall,

and have you got any sense in your tiny brain ‘at all”?

“You’re going for an eye test tomorrow, that’ll hopefully help

you see……

that you’re a regular nuisance, and a liability”!

I bought this car for my wife, about six months ago, and she always loved the way it drove, and didn’t complain about it, until I accidentally crashed it, and then she pointed out its faults(“hopefully to make me feel better”?), and, because of her skilled driving, the car had, apparently, ‘lots of faults’!

Her gloating, about my accident , would continue, especially about temporarily depriving her of her freedom, and how I couldn’t go to the pub anymore, because she didn’t have a car, with which, to take me or bring me home, BUT she had already seen a ‘sportier replacement’, to compensate for my actions!

PLEASE ENTER THE ABOVE STORY INTO THIS WEEKS COMPETITION.

Write a story where the first and the last words are the same

It’s an open and shut.… ‘sandwich’! (“Please publish to my profile ‘for free”)

What are your ingredients?

Life, or in particular, the life and existence of a human being,

can be compared to many things, and indeed it has been! My thoughts, of which I have many, are mostly resultant from being in a comatose situation, that began on the final day of 1992, and would last until the third month of 1993, during which my life would take a very dramatic and thought provoking ‘episode’, for a few intriguing months!

The coma that I suffered was in two parts, with the first part being in a deep, desolate and ‘seemingly doomed’ darkness, that was very confusing, frustrating and eerily frightening! This darkness seemed to be endlessly deep, where it was devoid of any surroundings or light, and it was a unique experience, that I feared would be endless, and this experience had an ‘unwanted dark uniqueness’, that went beyond ‘going underneath your blanket’ on your bed, but it increased the intensity of the eerie loneliness that I felt, which gradually became quite frightening because of the frustration and uncertainty that I felt, especially because I had no physical way of directing myself through it!

This darkness, would very slowly reveal, a very familiar, and a loving and friendly face, which had not been seen in about ten years, and it was my Great Aunt, who had sadly died several years before, AND she was behaving in a way that I had never witnessed before, SO the images that I had seen could not have been images that had been ‘recorded’, and stored in my injured brain, and recalled for future reference!

My Great Aunt looked surprised, confused and emotionally upset to see me ‘there’, and as tears ran down her face, she could be seen to ask, an ‘unseen someone’, behind her to ‘help him….please help him’, and I remained in the surrounding thick black!

Her image would be briefly seen again, but this time she could be seen with a calming smile on her gentle face, and she very slowly disappeared, with the thick darkness now becoming a lighter shade of grey, and I felt much calmer now, and my Great Aunt eventually disappeared, with my surroundings becoming gradually, and positively lighter, and I was no longer contained in ‘that’ frightfully dark and dismal place anymore, where there appeared to be no ending, no hope, and no positivity towards regaining, and returning to the promising future that I once had!

Whatever this lighter blanket of grey was, it enabled me to hear people’s voices clearer, along with other confusing sounds, that would keep my mind, and its imagination regularly active, and I really thank those kind, patient and caring people whose regular attendance, by my bedside, prompted my recovery and although their voices were clearer, I still couldn’t identify from whom these voices came, and that really frustrated me!

I would later learn, that some relatives and friends had travelled far to attend my bedside, and I would like to send them my gratitude, and my sincere thanks and love, especially to those who had made the effort to regularly travel far to see me, who on arrival would disappointingly hear-“that he’s in theatre at the moment, and he won’t be back in his bed for many hours”!

“I’m also sad for not being conscious to see other visitors, “not that’ I could see them”- My vision, had sadly not returned, and so this prolonged and frustrating darkness remained, to mostly hinder my thoughts, and my hopes of a perfect recovery, but, despite this continual darkness, I was now able to feel other physical sensations, but worryingly I could only feel them on one side of my body- ‘on the right side’, and it felt like I had been sawn in half -‘lengthwise’! Nevertheless, I was very comfortable underneath my woolly blanket and cotton sheet, and I felt very relaxed, especially because the voices around me were clearer, relaxing and calming.

“To all of those people who feel that they’re just ‘wasting their time’ talking to someone who is in a comatose condition, then let me reassure you that you’re not”! If you feel frustrated and downhearted, because you’re not getting any response, could mean that they are deeper into their coma, and your persistence, and the sound of your voice will eventually reach them”!

Think about that situation being like you’re on the road beach casting’- “or fishing, with a long fishing rod, from the beach for the and you’re casting your fishing line, with your voice being the bait, and in-order to catch the fish (“restart someone’s brain”), you have to cast your line, into the right area (“for them to eventually recognise/hear your voice, and gain their attention”!!) -to then reel/bring them back, and it might take many, many, many frustrating go’s, before you reach/catch the fish or the person! However, sometimes they might very sadly be too far out, and drifting towards an unknown ‘place’, where they will find another ‘place’, that my brother saw, just before he sadly died, as being in ‘such a lovely place, which was ‘so calming and relaxing’, and he was quoted as saying that after the surgeon managed to revive him, but instead of being grateful, he was quite irritated and angry about returning, and was heard to say, “what did you do that for, I was in such a lovely place, and he very sadly died at home, many months later, and I am so convinced that he has returned to ‘that lovely place’, and believing that made his loss so much easier to bare!

Having such a convinced belief in reincarnation makes losing someone, whether it’s a human being or a pet, makes their absence bearable, and if I attend a funeral I would prefer to wear brighter clothes, than the usual ‘full stop’ black clothes! Respect is in how you felt about someone, and being there to show and share your emotions and kind stories; “To me, with regards to funerals,, that when I was growing up, funerals appeared to be all ‘doom and gloom’, with the darkness of black, the handkerchiefs and the tears, and ‘especially in our village there was’, a long procession of black cars, that would all follow a long black car that was clearly displaying a ‘long wooden box’!

Fortunately for me, I could now hear familiar voices, which made this unenviable darkness much easier to tolerate! ‘At first’, it was so depressingly dark and barren, and only, seemingly offered my life’s ending, and this blackness was my life’s ‘full stop’! (“I would, many months later, learn that I had actually died on the operating table, but was very fortunately revived, and was reliant on a ventilator to help me breathe and keep me alive”)

The ventilator would be a permanent feature underneath my bed, as a ‘just in case’, and a daily reminder, of my vulnerability, which would install ‘very little’ in the way of positivity!

I had survived this very rare type of brain haemorrhage, and I was determined to show my gratitude, and to make something positive from my existence, and not to let my disability become a hindrance! I love life, but feel really troubled when I see continual wars, especially when I see heartbreaking famines around the World, and I always think that ‘it’s a pity they don’t spend those billions of pounds/dollars that are used for war on ending those famines, improving the health care, and the lives of humanity! “I’ll say no more”!

Thankfully, and very gratefully, “even though my disability hinders what I can, and I can’t eat, I still have a choice in the ingredients, or what I eat, and when I eat it! My sandwich may not be full of excitement, with many items of ingredient, but I like to think that it’s liked by many, it’s wholesome and it’s satisfying!!!

“The pieces of bread(“life and death”!)have been provided for you, and if you’re fortunate enough, the ingredients can be chosen by you”?

WHAT ARE YOUR INGREDIENTS?

PLEASE PUBLISH THIS STORY TO PROFILE FOR FREE

Posted Jun 05, 2025
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