Junior Year

As the bright orange and magenta hues of the sky started to darken and disappear amongst the horizon, I formed my index and thumb into a circle creating the OK symbol whilst following the sun as it went down. Its rays peeked out from between my fingers and the golden beams trickled my face. I heard Janica sigh next to me and watched as she threw her body backwards onto the soft surface of the grassy plain we were sitting on. She then proceeded to sling her right arm over her eyes as if to shield the sun from her face. Clearly, something was bothering her. To be fair, if I had found out last minute that I had to travel across the country while leaving everything behind to go live with a family member that I never even met, I’d be pressed too. The news came this morning from her mom, and I was the first person that Janica called. Talking with her on the phone, I could feel her rage.

           “It’s bullshit! Why do I have to go live with an aunt that I barely know the name of and on top of that, she lives in the country-side. What the hell am I gonna do playing in the grass all day?” Her seething frustration nearly melted the phone, I had to put her on speaker because she was so loud.

           “I get it dude, I would be pissed too. But your mom just lost her job, the least you can do is empathize with her.” I tried to sound as calm as possible, but sometimes Janica could be a real piece of work.

           She took a deep breath, “I know, I know. It just…..whatever. It sucks that I couldn’t at least have finished junior year, but at the end of the day, it’s not about me.” Janica sounded defeated, however I think she was finally starting to cool down.

           The rest of that morning was spent texting each other and having to listen to her vent about how unfair her situation was. The thing with Janica was that she grew up in a world that everything was guaranteed and taken care of for her. So when something as unexpected as having a parent being laid off happens, it’s as if the end of the world is near. Add to the fact that her dad has not spoken to her in ten years and the only family that she has ever heard of is her mom’s sister, the only thing I could do was feel bad for her. I figured the best move that I could make was to invite her to watch the sunset with me. Sort of like a going away gift and an opportunity to hang out one last time before she would leave the next morning.

           Looking at her now, laying in the field next to me, I decided to lay beside her with my hands behind my head. For a while, we did not say anything and just let the swiftness of the wind fill in the void for us. Janica then shifted her body weight on her side, facing me. I proceeded to mirror her. Instead of looking at me, she started to pick the grass as if she were searching for the words she wanted to say. The silence between us was thick enough to cut a knife through. Neither of us knew exactly what the other wanted to hear. I decided to fill the air first.

           “Do you know how long you’ll be gone?” It seemed like a dumb question, but she didn’t give off an expression of annoyance. Her answer was matter-of-fact, even.

           “A year. At least, that’s what my mom told me. Who knows, right?” her monotone voice descended into a whisper with that last sentence. She continued to diddle with the grass and avoiding eye contact. Suddenly, I got an idea.

           “Hey, it’s still light out. When was the last time we went to the lake together?” I asked enthusiastically. She matched my eyes and smirked, which was a promising sign that I was getting through to her.

           “You mean down the street? It might take a while to get there, plus you know how our moms are when it comes to being out during the dark.” She replied whilst sitting up. Then she stood up and dusted herself off. Finally, she reached her hand out to me as if to help me up. I took her hand in mine and helped myself to my feet. Looking back over the horizon, I watched as the sky now became a bluish, nearly indigo color. It wasn’t dark yet, but it was starting to get there. If we were quick enough, we could potentially knock out a few minutes before having to go home. I decided that it was worth a shot.

           “Heh, I think we can make it. It’s your last day, might as well make it special.” I said with a smile, which caused Janica to smile in return.

           “Ok, well, we just gonna talk or we gonna make our way over?” she asked, teasingly. I didn’t even notice that she had already started walking and caught up with her. Together we made our short trip over to the lake.

           The walk only took a few minutes as Janica showed me a shortcut that resulted in us tripping over a few scraggly branches and tip-toeing across a couple of spider webs. Making it to the shoreline, we sat on a conveniently placed log. The lake was beautiful at this hour with the glow of the fireflies illuminating the surface of the water. To add, no one else was around and it felt as if we were kids again, hiding in this secret spot. The lake was something that not many people knew about since it was hidden behind so many trees and it was such a pain to get to sometimes. Janica was the one who introduced me to it when we hung out for the first time. She called it her “safe space” since it was the quietest place for her to be besides the library at school. As we got older, coming to the lake was an occurrence that happened almost weekly up until we started highschool. That was when divorce made its way through the door and Janica had to help around the house more often, causing us to see each other less and less.

For some reason, a wave of melancholy brushed down from my head to my fingertips and my muscles tensed. My eyes had been so fixated on the water that I fell into a trance. It was getting dark, which indicated that our time would almost be up. The sound of Janica’s shoes crunching a dead leaf snapped me out of my gaze. Time to go, I thought.

           “Hey, we should probably get back. My mom just texted.” Janica motioned to her phone in her left hand and I nodded in agreement. As we walked back, we cut through another shortcut that went directly to our sea of houses. Since she lived closest, I decided to walk Janica home. Once we got to her front yard, she stopped in front of me and turned around. The streetlights were on and the windows of her house were also brightly illuminated. I looked at her and immediately noticed that she was tearing up. The warm orange light cascaded her face and brought out her blue, watery eyes.  

           “Hey…you ok?” I was so shocked, but I understood. She would be gone for a year and by the time she came back, we would both be seniors. We had never spent so much time apart before, it was scary for both of us.

           She rapidly nodded her head as if to reassure me that everything was in fact ok. However, the tears still flowed and the soft cries still came out. I reached out to hug her and she accepted my embrace. Underneath that glowing light, we both cried like babies. I don’t know how long we were standing on her front lawn but for the moment, it didn’t matter. I didn’t even notice Janica’s mom watching us from the living room window, wiping her cheek.

           Janica gave me a small memento to remember her by which was a tiny heart necklace with her initials on it. It was the same necklace that one of her grandparents gave to her when she was really small. She told me that I could keep it as she never wore it that much.

           “Are you sure? You know how I feel about gifts.” I asked cautiously.

           “Yes. And you better not lose it. I know how you are about jewelry, too.” She teased.

           “I vow to never take it off.” I assured whilst putting my hand over chest as if I were taking an oath.

           We both laughed and hugged one last time before she went inside. I waited for her to go in and waved goodbye to both her and her mom, who waved back from the window. Finally, I made my way back home.

           The next day was a Saturday, meaning that Janica was already on the plane about to leave home. For the next 365 days, I wouldn’t see her again. I woke up early that morning to the sound of chirping birds and the brightness of the sun peeking through my blinds. Rolling over on my side towards the window, I studied my wall that was decorated with pictures of me and Janica. Smiling to myself, I reminisced on all the fun times we had throughout the years. My trip down memory lane was thus shortened by the ding of my phone. Someone had texted me. Rolling over to the other side, I picked up my phone and looked at the screen. It was Janica. Instantly, I sat up beaming. She had sent a selfie of herself sitting in her airline seat. I texted back, wishing her a safe flight and went back to lying in bed.

           The rest of the day was spent doing barely anything. I had errands to run that consisted of getting myself prepared for the upcoming school year and not trying to think about Janica. Though we were texting each other all day, I didn’t want to feel sad thinking about her being gone. With the permission of my mom, I went out for a walk around the neighborhood to get my mind off things and to feel a bit lighter. They say that junior year is supposed to be the hardest year of high school due to college and having to “figure your life out”. Janica and I used to talk all the time about our futures and what they might have in store for us. In reality, neither of us had a clue of what we were going to do once we graduated. Everything felt big and scary, yet we were these tiny beings. I didn’t how I was going to make it through this year without her.

           Without thinking, I had made my way back to the lake. The log was still there and funny enough so were our footprints. I sat back in the same spot as last time and looked out into the water. Again, no one else was around and the atmosphere was mostly quiet. A few crickets were spread out here and there, but the only other sound present was my breath. Looking at my phone, I noticed a text from Janice letting me know that she had just landed. I sent back a thumbs up and told her to call me when she got to the house. Putting my phone away, I closed my eyes and meditated for a while. Letting the sound of the crickets guide me, I felt my body relax and cool down. For what felt like an hour, I simply sat and waited. Waited for what I don’t know, but something inside me told me to stay at the lake for a bit longer. Suddenly, the sound of footsteps caused me to flinch and I quickly looked behind me. An older woman with scraggly, red hair and slightly, dirty clothes was approaching me. For some reason, my heart started to pound. I knew that I wasn’t doing anything wrong, yet I felt that I was being caught for trespassing. However, the woman walked past me and stood right in front of the water. It was as if she was going to get in the water, still fully clothed. She didn’t say a word to me, just stared at the sky which had became an indigo hue and sprinkled with stars.

           I knew I had to get back home, so I proceeded to stand up. Before I turned around, however, the woman asked me a question that stopped me in my tracks. At first, I thought she was talking to herself but as I turned back towards her, I noticed that her full attention was on me.

           “Out alone by yourself, huh?” was the question she asked. She did not seem threatening at all. In fact, she kind of reminded me of Janica’s mom as they both had a rugged style to them. It was too dark to make out her face too well, but I knew she was unfamiliar to me. I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to respond to her or just walk away; I knew that it was rude to ignore people, but I also was aware of stranger danger. I decided to take my chances.

           “Heh, yeah. Just wanted to enjoy the view for a while.” I awkwardly replied. Since I couldn’t see her face there was no way of telling what she could’ve been thinking. “You come out here often? I don’t think I’ve seen you around.” I don’t know why I felt compelled to keep the conversation going, but my mouth just kept running.

           “No, I don’t. I was actually waiting to meet someone but then they dipped on me last minute.” Her words sounded sad and I started to regret feeling weird about her presence. “Ah, to hell with them, I guess. No use crying over spilled milk right, haha.” She chuckled to herself.

           I played along, “Ha, yep. Hate when that happens.” I slightly muttered. The woman started walking back my way, which indicated that she was leaving. I waited for her to leave first before I moved and watched as she stood next to me and look back towards the trail.

           With a deep sigh she began, “Welp, it’s getting pretty late. If you need a ride home, my truck ain’t too far.” Her friendly tone was inviting but I refused. With a final nod, she made her way back to wherever she came from and disappeared.

           Weird was the only way I could describe that encounter. My phone pinged repeatedly as messages from my mom flooded my notifications. Quickly texting back as fast as I could, I glanced back at the lake to make sure that no one else was behind me. To my surprise, I noticed the faint glow of what looked like a silver pendant. Walking over to study it, the actual shape of the object became more and more clear. It was a small, silver necklace with a heart-shaped charm on it. Picking it up, I felt the cool of the metal on my fingers and looked at the charm. What I saw written made me furrow my brow. In cursive letters was three initials, but what stood out to me was the fact that the initials matched exactly with the necklace Janica gave me. Maybe it was a coincidence and maybe that woman dropped it without noticing. I decided to keep it and suddenly sensed the vibration of my phone; mom was calling.

           “Hello?” I answered, already expecting to be chewed out

           “Where the hell are you, its almost 9pm!” she yelled, annoyed.

           “Sorry, I stopped by the lake and lost track of time.” I was still looking at the charm.

           She took a deep breath. “I’m coming to get you, don’t. move.” Her words were sharp and she immediately hung up.

           I proceeded to call Janica to tell her about my weird night. As the phone dialed, I looked out into the water and thought about who that woman could be. I wondered if I would see her again and what I was going to do with this necklace. Staring at the reflection of the moon painted in the water’s surface, I smiled thinking just how interesting junior year was going to be.