FROM ME, BY ME, TO ME

Dear Me,

I’m your Number One Fan. As I write you this letter, I hope it finds you well. I hope everything is good. I hope my dreams for you are no longer dreams. I hope my dreams are your reality. 

How is mom? And how is the family? How much have you grown? I can only wonder, but I hope that when this letter reaches you, you are everything I hope for you to be – and even more.

My goal in writing you this letter is to share some thoughts that I think you will find very useful. It’s easy to get ‘caught up’ when you’re in the thick of things. What I hope to achieve with this letter is to give you a bird’s-eye view of things. Like Steve Jobs said, intelligence is the ability to ‘zoom-out’ and see the full picture, and then ‘zoom-in’ again and apply the lessons learnt. I hope this letter makes that happen for you.

1. Friendships: I don’t know if you still think the same way as I do now, but I hope you don’t have a different view on friendships. In my time at the helm of affairs, I have tried to develop a culture of taking time very seriously. I’d rather you be alone, with a book, or with your thoughts, than spend time with ‘good-enough’ friends. You must be conscious of the company you keep. Seek out great friends, friends with whom you can build a ‘peer-to-peer mentorship’. If you’re not learning or deriving value from time spent with them, if all they do is consume your time with trivial issues, let them go.

2. Friendships – again: I know I have built a culture that leans towards extremism on this ‘valuable friends only’ policy. While it’s a great policy to have and to abide by, it’s easy to take it too far. What are the signs that you’re in ‘too far’ territory? Arrogance. That’s the one thing you should look out for. One of the problems that results from working day and night to improve yourself is that it makes it easy to look down on others, because as we both know, most people are too lazy to do the work of improving themselves. This is no excuse for allowing low-value relationships, not at all! All I’m recommending is that you cut people some slack. If they’re making an effort, no matter how little, give them the benefit of doubt. A not-so-valuable relationship today could evolve into an incredibly valuable life-long relationship.

3. Work: I know I like to say – and think – that I’m eager to do more and get more done, but I know that I can be really lazy at times. And I think you will suffer from this even more than I do today, especially because I still have a lot to look forward to, but you already have wins to your name. Although I procrastinate on things from time to time, I know is that once I set aside excuses and get to work, it’s easy for me to get my engine running. Take this letter for one. I got this prompt about a week ago and I already decided to make a submission, but I pushed it up until tonight, just a day before the deadline – and I still didn’t want to do it! But the moment I sat in front of my computer and started to type, the ideas started coming. So that’s a tip for you. Just take a seat, inhale, exhale, and get it done. 

4. Self-Development: Never stop exploring. The day you stop learning, the day you stop seeking out new information and experiences, the day you start to see yourself as ‘wise and all-knowing’, is the day your mind starts to wither and die. Never stop exploring. Never stop learning. Never ignore the urgings of curiosity. Never outgrow your imagination. Stay foolish. Stay hungry.

5. Mentorship: This is something that has occurred to me on multiple occasions, and I hope you will have the capacity to do it. Many of the ideas and thoughts you will benefit from are a result of the immense value I’ve been able to extract from the mentorship of others – much of which has come in the form of transfer of experience and wisdom through books and other media – and I think it’s important for you to look to this, especially if you’re a much older version of me. What use is all the experiences you must have garnered if you take it to the grave? I recommend you use it to water younger generations.

6. Culture: I hope you will still have as much interest in travel and the exploration of new cultures as I do. While I didn’t have the finances to fly around the world and experience those cultures I find intriguing, I have leveraged the internet to explore many of them. I hope you avoid this. As the world leans further into technology, I fear that technology will become so central to man’s existence that man will live oblivious to the immediate world around him. Travel somewhere. Meet new people. Have face-to-face interactions. Experience new cultures first-hand.

7. Consumerism: Just this afternoon, I read an article that further reinforced my conviction that humanity is pushing itself over the cliffs-edge. You must avoid the ‘happiness is in your next purchase’ mindset that seems to have swallowed the world. If it’s gotten this terrible in my time, I can only imagine what it must be like in the world you live in. Buying things won’t make you happier. They may give you a temporary rush, but that rush is quickly outlived. You will find happiness in experiences, that’s the best way to invest your time and money. You will find happiness in gardening. You will find happiness in mountain-climbing or biking. You will find happiness in tending to fish and watching them grow. You will find happiness in running around in the grass with your spouse and children. You will find happiness in the shade of a tree, in the company of the wind. You will find happiness in things that don’t necessarily come with a price-tag.

8. Forgiveness: Forgiveness is never easy. Especially when it comes to people who seem bent on hurting you again and again. Sometimes it’s so bad that I actually project an inability to forgive into the future. I hope my projections fail. I hope they never reach you. I hope you find the strength of character to forgive again and again. I also hope you find the wisdom to know the difference between the people and situations you should forgive and hold on to, and the people and situations you should forgive and then forget.

9. Love: Find a woman who is the embodiment of peace. I’ve had my fair share of dating extroverted women and I have developed a distaste for them, probably because I’m the exact opposite, and as you must know, opposites don’t always attract. At times, like attracts like. I’ve come to find that I prefer the Cool, Calm, and Collected type. And I think this will suit you best. It’s easy to get caught up in smartness and intelligence and ignore the “Three-C’s”. Don’t fall into this trap. Find an intelligent, cool, calm, and collected woman, and give yourself to her with 100% loyalty.

10. Family: Some people say family is all that matters, and while I love my family deeply, I’ve never really been able to relate to the part that reads: all that matters. Maybe my experiences with family have gotten in the way of my ability to understand that part of the quote. I hope your situation is different from mine. While family does matter, perhaps, family doesn’t always have to be based off of a blood connection. Family is anyone who actively chooses to be family. Family is anyone who is willing to make the sacrifices required for the advancement of other members of the family. Family isn’t always blood. I hope you find and integrate yourself into many families. The world is too big to restrict yourself to just one family. Find yourself a place in a work family, a self-development family, a health family, a religious family, and more.

The year has been a tough one. 2020 gifted me many surprises. 2020 gave me time and space to achieve many goals and hit many milestones. 2020 brought with it many disappointments. But the good far outweigh the bad. If you get this letter, and it meets you in a better state than it left me, it means that I did my bit and I did it well. I don’t know what version you are, reading this, perhaps Version 2021, perhaps Version 2035, perhaps Version 2050. Whichever one it is you are, I hope this letter finds you in a better condition, in a better situation, and with bigger dreams than I could ever have. 

I dreamt about you all year. I worked hard to acquire the tools and resources you’d need to achieve our goals and ambitions. And most especially, I worked hard to keep you safe from the pandemic. Now it’s your turn to do your bit. Don’t ever forget, greatness is not a destination, greatness is a journey. The baton is now in your hand. Godspeed.

Yours Faithfully,

Version 2020.