Tomorrow is the Greatest Trap

What the hell was Rodney doing now? Sydney opened her eyes to find Rodney dancing and talking to his Full Throttle energy drink. He was just beyond the freshly mulched palm stand where Sydney, Boz, Lorette, and Michah took their respite from the sweltering Florida sun. 

“Rodney, you look like a goddamn tweaker!” Sydney shouted, “Get your ass back over here before somebody calls the cops.”

Of course, he wasn’t tweaking. They hadn’t been able to score enough ice for that lately - just enough to get by. The little bit in her backpack and the dime of weed had to last through the end of the week. The weed would be gone by tomorrow, but the ice might last a bit longer; the family resources had been stretched since picking up Michah and Lorette. At least Lorette brought in her social security check each month, but Michah - poor kid - wasn’t good for much of anything yet. Sydney had come to think of him as a little brother.

Rodney froze mid-gyration: in one hand his soiled green tee stretched out taut from his body, in the other the energy drink. He looked the better part of forty, grungy, and with clothes already two sizes too baggy for his skeletal figure; however, Sydney knew from his ID that his thirtieth birthday had only just passed. She had skimped for a week to spring for a small cake.

“Aw, come on, now! I’m just havin’ some fun.”

“Ain’t gon’ be fun when someone calls the cops,” Sydney called back, “Besides, look at Lily out there. You’re distracting the drivers at the light.”

Lily shot daggers at Rodney from the median. The traffic light changed, and the cars began to move again. The sign she held read: “Out of work. Homeless. Anything helps.” Today was her turn to solicit handouts and bake in the sun. Rodney’s antics in the background weren’t helping.

Sydney, for one, was glad to be resting beneath the palms. She had taken more than her fair share of turns at the stoplight in recent weeks owing to the fact that she typically brought in more than anyone else; well, except for Lorette, but she was nearly seventy and couldn’t take the heat for very long. Sydney was only twenty-two with an even younger face.

Rodney still stood beyond the shade, defiant. He didn’t like being told what to do.

“Come on, Rod,” Boz said. Boz was into his early sixties and couldn’t feel his feet anymore from diabetes. He stroked the white bush that was his beard and produced a pack of 305s. He held the pack out to Rodney, “Split a cigarette with me.” He had been trying to quit smoking for the past few months, ever since Sydney joined the family. Sharing whatever he smoked was his newest strategy for cutting down.

Mollified, Rodney plopped cross-legged next to Boz and lit a cigarette.

“Why don’t you try the Publix, Rodney?” Lorette suggested. “Saturdays are usually good days down there.”

Rodney just sucked on the cigarette and bobbed to whatever song was playing in his mind.

Boz shook his head. “Marv’s staked it out for today.”

The light at the intersection turned red, and cars began backing up. Lily paced down the median, pausing every few yards to adjust her pants. A naturally heavy woman, she had been losing weight. Lily stopped again. A car had rolled down its window.

Sydney unconsciously held her breath. You could never tell what would happen next. Sometimes people gave goodie bags, other times they wanted to preach, once in a while you got someone who just wanted to yell at you. Most times, however, people handed over their spare change.

A hand extended from the car with something green in it. Lily took it, looked at it for a moment, and put her hands to her heart thanking the driver. It was a matter of course; after hours in the merciless sun it was hard to feel anything strongly except for thirst and exhaustion. Sydney knew that much from experience; however, the show was still a good sign. Collecting spare change and free advice made for a grueling grind, but all it took was one person out of the hundreds who passed by in an hour to hand you a twenty. Just like that you had made more than you would at an hourly job. It made it all worth the wait.

“Looks like Lily scored a nice one, huh?” Rodney sidled up beside Sydney and squeezed her thigh. He left his hand resting there afterward.

Sydney wished he wouldn’t do that, but she figured it was her fault for letting him sleep with her. Lily tried to warn her that he would get attached, and that the same thing happened with the last girl who came through the family. It wasn’t even that Sydney particularly wanted to sleep with him at the time, but sometimes you just needed to feel cared for. He’d been acting sweet on her ever since.

“Looks like it,” she agreed. The breeze rustled the fronds overhead and bore the scent of the intracoastal and the beaches beyond. It carried her mind somewhere else, away from the daily asphalt reality to the water she once loved. She wanted to be surfing, but Sydney sold her board almost three months ago. It was too bulky to keep with her, and besides, they had needed the money. That was when Michah turned up.

Sydney’s eyes drifted to where Michah lay dozing. He didn’t talk about home much, but she gathered from bits and pieces that he had run from some kind of abuse. He didn’t trust anybody who was drinking and shied away more than usual whenever anyone in the group had alcohol. Sydney thought he was maybe fifteen or sixteen and wanted to help him move on to a better place. She just didn’t know how. She hadn’t even figured that out for herself.

The light changed to green, the traffic began moving, and Lily crossed the walk towards their oasis. “I need a break,” Lily announced. “Imma hit the Circle K for something to drink and some AC. Any of y’all want anything?”

“Yeah,” Lorette said, fumbling in her purse to pass a dollar to Lily, “I’ll take a Gatorade or whatever they got.”

Lily took the money and put it in one pocket. Out of the other she produced a wad of bills and handed it to Boz to count and keep. “Couple of fives and tens in there,” she said, “should add up decent. That last car gave me a twenty. Anyone else want something from the gas station?”

“Pick up something for Michah,” Sydney said. “He didn’t eat anything today yet. Can I pay you back when we get back to the house tonight?”

Lily looked from Sydney to the sleeping Michah. “Sure,” she said, “No problem.” Lily tossed the cardboard sign on the ground near Sydney and strode across a dense mat of St. Augustine grass towards the Circle K.

“What’s the total?” Lorette asked.

Boz counted the cash. “Fifty four.”

It was a really good number, but it would not be enough. Sydney helped keep track of the family expenses. They would make rent and keep the utilities on for this month, but the fridge and cupboards were empty. However, she was more concerned with replacing the two small bags in her backpack. Skipping a meal wasn’t as big a deal as running out of that.

Sydney looked around at the group. Rodney had finally calmed down and laid on his back next to her. Boz sat atop the cooler, his shoes off, rubbing his feelingless feet. Lorette tried to hide it, but Sydney could see her shaking. The woman had been rationing her medication and needed the end of the month to come soon. Michah still slept, and that was fine. She heard him muttering all night long and was certain he didn’t sleep most nights. Lily would be an hour between the gas station and regaining her stamina in the AC. That was an hour of peak time lost. Sydney grabbed the sign and pushed herself up.

“What are you doin’ Syd?” Lorette asked.

“Someone’s gotta make us some money while Lily is gone. We all know I’m the most likely to pull decent bills.” What she didn’t add was no one else was particularly capable of standing out there at the moment.

“Aw, hon,” said Lorette, “You’ve been out there too much. Look at your skin. You’re all burnt up like a lobster.”

Sydney shrugged off the concern. “It’ll only be until Lily cools off. I’ll be fine.” She felt Rodney squeeze her calf.

“That’s right,” he said, “She’s a trooper. Besides, she looks cute with all those freckles.”

Sydney thought she was liable to turn into one giant freckle, but that was neither here nor there. She crossed the street into the median. Sweltering ripples rose from the asphalt around her, and she thought of the times she drove by this very intersection and looked from her air conditioned car with half-averted yet greedy eyes to ogle the panhandlers. She never thought back then that she could possibly stand where she did now. But that was back in college - before she dropped out. Come to think of it, she didn’t really have that many credits left before finishing.

The light changed, and cars drove by. 

Sydney held the sign in front of her, and she waited. She waited for a lot of things. She waited for the cars to stop and to see who would roll down their window. She waited for Lily to come back from the gas station. She waited for things to start coming together for her. It didn’t feel like that long ago that she was on the other side. Maybe she would finish her last year of college. Then she could get back in control of her life; she could move on and even get a job. She would love to start surfing again. Somewhere along the way things got out of control. She put her life on pause and then set it aside. She was waiting to return to it; she wanted to return to it. As the cars passed by, she thought maybe she would get started tomorrow.