Just for the talent

Replaying her words in his oval shaped head is not the best option,cos their urge to lead him,control,mislead and wreck him was overwhelming. Ben trailed the edge of his windows curtain,that was already cleared off the path of the window,allowing the sunset ray into his room with his eyes,thinking,is it a crime to keep the display of my gift to the world for age 18?...can't I decide?..did she birth me because of my gift?.. He then realized these questions won't be answered if he doesn't take a step,but what kind of step?

'Why can't you be like your brother?'

Ben unwillingly replayed his mum words again,but what the f**k is that?..he asked himself,am I my brother?..are we joint beings?,even If we are joint are we destined jointly?.He aroused from his mattress and meandered in his room. Sam is different,his brother his different...he is loud spoken,buzzy..not a cuzzly Ben. 

' she's making it seem like the typist Ben is useless because I haven't displayed him to the world..at age 15' he thought as he vexingly kicked his bedside. His mum never gave him comfortable breathing space all because he is not displaying his gift to the world already..

'....you are just good for nothing' Ben replayed with pain,remembering her words is bad,awful and painful. Good for nothing?...now who says that to their child,who does that?...having an awful mom is one of the most dreadful things in the whole universe;a mum that praises one over another alongside condemning the other. Ben slammed his hand on his computer desk,though he did not produce any bang alongside avoiding damaging his computer,cos.mum is home. Good for nothing is a murderous word,it makes one think and dream of taking chilly actions.

'how am I good for nothing?' Ben asked himself,he gets good grades in school ever since grade day one,he has a good reputation in the neighborhood,and above all he has a friend that reflects his ethic..then how come. Mum words are nothing to think about as they control one who can't control his or herself and give thoughts to think about. Good for nothing,Ben is good but mum says he is good for nothing;that means his good reputation,good grades,ethical friemd, and so on and so forth are nothing to her..all she respects is the talent...

'...I may resort to relocating you to the woods,where my cousin the farmer lives'. To the woods....to do what...from the city to the woods...for what... Ben took his seat on the tiled floor of the four walls that serves as his fortress when mum starts.. Mum dislikes me,all she wants is income from me,did she birth me so she can extort or make money from me..or should I say with me. Cos all she talks to me about is making money;dad already got us covered as he provides almost or should I say all we need. Having read stories of people who committed murder out of frustration,he thought about just ending it all,but James ethical commendations and encouragements deters him from taking that awful act. 

'...you should be ashamed of yourself'. Don't want to remember her words again,this head...Ben hit his head with his left.hand,painfully and he gave himself.or his head an aching feeling..shouldn't have done that. Why should I be ashamed...cos my brother before me is displaying his talent already...he is 19 for Chrissake...what the f**k?.. 

Ben's dad minds his inability to express and utilize his undisplayed gift at a present age 15,but he doesn't condemn him for that...he portrays what a man his and willingly leaves his wife to portray what a woman is...nagging. Mum nags a lot...and the most painful path is that she nags me to destroy.me...not to carve the glorious Ben out. Dad loves his wife therefore he doesn't say anything to her on her inhuman act....he dare not though. The feeling of being condemned to destruction is destroying..mum thinks she is condemning me to fulfilment but she did not take the test of condemning to fulfilment,therefore she is deducing the act of condemning to destruction...you don't tell one he or she is useless while condemning to fulfilment without firmly or immediately backing it up with 'if you can aim high you will become useful'......saying words that drive the joy, color and light out of an individuals face is not the word suitable and ordained for the path of condemning to fulfilment.

"Ben...you in there?" Came mum's knock or should I say bang and there she goes again..Ben did not reply her,cos he already locked his door and doesn't want any visit from her whatsoever.

"Ben..I know you're in there....so will you open the damn door?" Ben replayed the two last words in his head...damn door...I've never seen a parent say that to their child... never...you don't damn me..you birthed me and I am your child,you shouldn't be cruel to me on silly things.

"Well get ready to go to the woods 10 days for now...the 10 days countdown is your last chance to display your talent" came the instruction and her foots were heard leaving his doorstep. 10 days from now..who gives a good child a countdown for displacement...you shouldn't displace your child...said a good child..that's cruel.

Ben stood up and went to his bed,unleashed his covercloth and went under it covering his head. 10 days...but dad why..why can't you do anything...is she the only woman. Since dad won't correct or cut ties with her I think the best thing I'll have to do is to cut ties with her my f**cking self. Ben has nowhere to go... definitely he can't relocate to James',cos James parent would make a correction and reconcilation and they won't be in support of a 15 year old dude taking refuge in their home individually decesional and above all it is illegal and unapprovable by US authority,to leave ones parents at age 15,his present age...but that's not what he wants,he loves his room,father's care and the feeling of being at home that oversees his feelings...think I will just cut ties with her and still continue living here

"Dad...I disown mum,as from now on I only have ties with dad and other relatives,not with you anymore" Ben rehearsed

I just hope this won't be something I will regret....