Gold Lamé

“Hi! This is my seat, yeah, 32B. So… let me just shove my bag up here. Okay! So what do you do? Me, well, I’m a backup singer for The Reversibles. I know, I know, it sounds like a line of anti-aging creams. It wasn’t my idea. Whatever.

You’re probably wondering ‘Why backup?’ Exactly - you’re giving me that look. The one that’s a bit of pity and a lotta confusion. The look that wants to ask, ‘Don’t you wanna be the lead singer?’

Well, no. Nope, nope, I’m just fine where I am, thank you very much. That’s what I tell you and everyone else.

Hang on, let me get my seatbelt fastened and everything. Whew! Okay. You got yours done up? Good. So anyway, they keep bugging me. They say in this cutesy voice - ‘But you sing so well! You should just try!’

Oh, I’ve tried, let me tell you. But not because I wanted to. As a kid, I sang in choirs, and in the chorus in school musicals. I never sang a solo, never sang the lead. Then junior year, the music teacher — Mr. Piotrowski was his name — begged me to audition for the lead in West Side Story. ‘Maria? Me?’ I said. No, I couldn’t possibly. He asked me to try out for Anita instead, but she has a big solo, so I said no to that too. I ended up one of the Shark Girls and that was fine with me.

Oh, they’re doing the safety demonstration. You’ve flown before, right? Everybody’s flown before, at this point, so who cares?

What was I saying? Oh yeah, I was talking about Mr. P. Well, senior year he was stricter with me. He told me I had it in me, that I was good enough to be the lead. It got harder to say no. So he says to me - Don’t you want to be a singer? Well yes, I told him, but I like to sing with the other girls. Then he says - get this - ‘So you want to be a professional backup singer?’ My jaw dropped at that, let me tell you! It was the first time I’d heard it like that, like a real profession!

Now listen to what he said next, in his dorky teacher voice - ‘Well, then you have to prove how good you are, by singing the lead.’ That’s what he said, can you believe it? It didn’t make any sense! Singing the lead and singing backup are two totally different things. He’d basically told me so when he said there was such a thing as a “professional backup singer.” But I figured he knew better. So I auditioned. That’s how I got to be Sandy in “Grease.” I sure wish I’d been one of the Pink Ladies. I’d hear them singing “Summer Nights” and wish I was doing the harmony with them instead. Anyway, apparently I did okay because Mr. P was so proud he got me a scholarship for summer stock, where they convinced me to audition for Roxie in “Chicago.” 

Hey, we’re taking off! Whoa, it’s always so cool when we take off, don’t you think? Wooo!

So, where was I? Oh yeah, I was Roxie! I did good, or so they said. But it never really felt like me. It’s like… my voice could do it. But the rest of me didn’t want to be the star. People told me I should go on those shows. Y’know, American Idol, The Voice or whatever, but I never did. I just watched them on TV. I didn’t even major in music! I went to nursing school instead. But I’m a backup singer with the Reversibles, yes I am!

You know what our lead singer’s name is? Bubba. I don’t know how she got that name. She wants to change the band’s name to Bubba and the Reversibles. What do you think? It has a ring to it, actually. Bubba sings the melody, of course. She really belts it out. That’s what divas do, and believe it or not, she does it in a gold lamé bodysuit! She was born for it. She’s the one with the biggest voice, the most makeup, and the biggest hair. And she can stand in front of that microphone with everyone watching her and belt it out. From behind her, sometimes we have to signal to the sound guy to up the volume on our microphones. We’re singing the harmony. The doo-wops to her woo-yeah-honeys.

Oh hi, yes can I get a coffee? Thanks. Yup, creamer and sugar!

What was I saying? Oh yeah! Woo-yeah-honey, ha ha. It’s not easy, you know. You have to train your ear to not sing the melody. You have to sing alongside Bubba, but sing totally different notes. Imagine that. Have you ever tried it?

As for Bubba, she knows the melody is hers and hers alone. She doesn’t pay any attention to the harmony. She doesn’t have to, she figures. Are you rolling your eyes there? I know, right? Pretty arrogant behavior. That’s the way those divas are.

Oh are you trying to get to the bathroom? Well okay then, lemme just scoot my legs over a bit. See ya later!

Oh you’re back. Scooch right in, okay? There ya go.

So anyway, guess why I’m flying to Detroit! Motown, yeah baby! Are you from there? Anyway, you probably guessed it - we’ve got a gig! The Reversibles, yep, yessirree.I just love it. We’re gonna do ‘Respect’’. It’s my favorite song. “Just a little bit… just a little bit…” That’s my part. You know how it goes. Do you like Aretha? I’m sure you do, bein’ from Detroit ‘n all!

Hey, did you know that once upon a time somebody went around impersonating Aretha? The nerve! I forget her name but she did a bunch of concerts before they caught her. It was in the 60’s, I think, so you probably didn’t hear about it. I bet you weren’t even born yet! I was just a little girl.

Ooh, we’re landing in Motown, woo-yeah honey!

It was so nice chatting with ya! Come see us, the Reversibles! Got a three-night gig. See ya!”

Opening the overhead compartment, she tugged on her hot pink duffelbag, which hit the back of the seat in front of her, nearly missing the passenger’s head and tumbled onto her seat. As she leaned over to it, her jacket fell open and a lanyard swung forward.

BARBARA RIVERS / NATIONAL NURSING CONVENTION 2025 / DETROIT

As she lifted her bag over her shoulder, a bit of fabric peeked out from the end of the zipper. Gold lamé.