Maybe

           Vroom, vroom. Yeah, I'm getting to go along this time. I hate it when they leave me in the house alone, but this time I'm getting to go on the trip.  Yeah!!! Wonder where we're going. I know it's not the vet, because every time we go to the vet, they bring a bag of my poop. I don't know why they do that. Anyway, maybe this time I'll get a treat, like vanilla ice cream. Yum. Or maybe they'll take me to the store with all the other dogs, where there are dog toys, dog treats, and other fun things. Or maybe we'll go to the dog park where I can meet and mate with other dogs. We go on the highway. That's normal, going on the highway. But, I wonder where we're going. Maybe we're going to the zoo where there are interesting smells. Or maybe we're going to a playground where all the kids will pet me. Maybe. Or maybe we're going to go to a grocery store where they'll put me in the kid's seat and push me around while they shop. Or maybe they'll reinvent Smellivision (all rights reserved) where we can smell what's happening in the movie or tv shows. Like when they're at the gas station or in the forest. See, us dogs have strong olfactory nerves.  See, us dogs dream in smells. We sniff trees to see what other animals marked this territory or if we've marked the territory before. That's important to us dogs. And we never like it when our owners have petted another person's pet, like a cat or a gerbal. We know what you humans are up to. We may look dumb, but we love you and always want to know where you've been. We observe the TV shows and movies you watch, we see what kinds of foods you like and don't like, hell, we even see what you humans do at night when no one's around, which is the same thing we do when everyone's watching. We hate when you launder our blankets or toys, because it takes that beautiful scent away. Do you know why us dogs roll in our own feces? Hell, I do. And it's only partially because of the smell. 

           You humans also think us dogs are color blind, but we're not. We can see color, just not all the colors, but we don't see in black and white like on the old TV shows.  Us dogs also know when you're having a good day and when you're having a bad day, because we're all psychic. It's in our genes. Also, we can smell and sense when a catastrophe is about to happen, like an earthquake, a panic attack, or a seizure. We also can sniff out drugs, bombs, people, or any other scent, but we have to be trained for that. Some humans don't think us dogs can feel emotions, but that's a bunch of bullshit. We feel happy, sad, lonely, love, etc., just like the rest of the animal kingdom. And we care about our pack. See, there's an alpha in the pack and we want to be that alpha so we can get the liver of an animal after the kill. Mmm. Liver. Then, the rest of you can get something like the legs. We want meat though. Don't be giving us a plate with fruits or vegetables. 

           We're still on this road. Weird. It feels like we've been on this road for a few hours. That's unusual. What if they're taking me somewhere to shoot me, or worse yet, selling me to another owner? What if they're going to abandon me in the middle of nowhere like that dog, Charlie, in the cartoon? White line, white line, green sign. Wonder when we're going to stop so I can go potty like a good boy, outside? We seem to be driving a long ways. Why we driving a long way? Nothing I know is this far away. Then, we stop at our new home. They go in and talk to some person and they get out their wallet and swipe a card through a machine. I've seen that happen a billion times.  Then, we go outside so I can go potty. It has the smell of other dogs. Maybe this is a dog park afterall. Then, we go in our new home and I sniff around and they go potty in a toilet. Humans are so strange. Then, they brush their teeth and go to bed and I get to be in the bed with them. They snore, but it's a cute snore, and I curl up into a ball and fall asleep, too.

           Next morning, they wake me up. Why? I was sleeping so well and having a wonderful dream. Then, they go back to where they got the key for our new home and then we go back in the car after they put some other things in the car, and start driving. Where the hell are we going? Do we need to get more things for our new home? But, we seem to be going a long way again. Oh, well, at least I'm going with them. There are all these different kind of trees and bushes. Interesting. Where are we going and what are we getting for our new home? But, it's a long drive again. Maybe they're moving multiple times. I don't care, as long as we're not going to the vet and I get to come along. 

           But, then, something weird happens. I hear this loud, round, sound and see lights and they pull over and say some swear words. What's going on? The people in blue uniforms forces them out of this car and they seem upset, so I growl and bark at them, but one of the men in the blue shirts puts this electric thing by me, which hurts and I'm scared and they're crying and they're going in the other car with the loud noise, but then the noise stops and their hands are behind their back and there's nothing I can do. Then, one of their cars drives off with them in the back. Are they moving to another new home? Am I going to the new home with them? The other man in the blue suit gives me a treat and puts me in the back of their car. Maybe we're both going to the same new home? But, then, I'm taken to a place that looks like a kennel and dogs are barking and cats are meowing and they aren't here. So, I put my tail between my legs, look down, and hope they'll be back to pick me up from the kennel and go to a new new home. Maybe that'll be our permanent home. Maybe.