Tea with the Wind

“SCREECH!”

It hit us like a train, out of nowhere! I barely had any time to react. The car rips through the metal of the passenger side door. Everything went black, the last thing I remember before losing my consciousness was me and my friend being rushed into an ambulance. The paramedics told us that “everything is going to be okay!” If only what they said were true.

“That car came out of nowhere didn’t it?!” I ask, nervously chuckling under my breath.

I take a sip of my tea as I look through his translucent eyes. The wind ripples his body as it sways back and forth. However, he seems to be completely unphased by it.

“Yeah, it did! He didn’t even have his headlights on, and speeding too! That’s a disaster waiting to happen if I’ve ever seen one!”

“Amen to that man!” I exclaim as I point a finger at him.

“It’s kinda weird to think about it from time to time, knowing that those were my final moments alive.”

“Yeah”, I sigh as I look down at my tea, catching my distorted reflection in the ripples.

He sighs and asks me how his family has been.

“Your family has been good. It’s been hard for them to deal with, but they are managing. Your mother is still taking care of that cat she told you not to get! She has come to love that animal. Your dad has been pretty irritable ever since you died, he hates me. He has told me that ‘I wish you died in that accident’. I can’t help but agree with him, he isn’t wrong. Your cousins go and visit your grave every week and place a flower in front of the stone. I’m curious if you’ve noticed?!

“I have, tell them ‘he would be thankful’”. He chuckles.

“Your sister has been in a huge funk lately, despite being accepted into her dream university with the highest possible scholarship!”

“Really?!”, he sounds surprised.

“Yeah man, it’s incredible. We threw a little celebration for her and everything! She told me she wished you could have attended though. Those statements eat me up, I don’t think they realize it. Me causing your death has caused me so much distress sometimes I wish I died in the crash that night. I was the driver, why couldn’t it have been me?!”

“It isn’t your fault you know?!” 

I look up at him, my emotions start to stir. Filled with anger and shame. However, he just keeps looking at me with the same, kind, empathetic stare.

“I love that I am able to see you at will, here in this quiet place. We are able to talk and have an actual conversation, not something that happened a lot when we were constantly hanging out with larger crowds.” He says

I snap, “How is it not my fault?! If it weren’t for my tired ass, we’d still be able to do those things! Headlights or not, it was a white car, those are easy to see at night!” 

Tears start to roll down my face as I look into the eyes of my dead friend. The friend that I knew since I was a kid, the friend that irresponsibly put his life into my hands. The grief I caused to so many people. His friends and family have been nothing but supportive, except for his father, and I have no clue why because I don’t deserve that type of support. Especially not from the people who lost a loved one to me. My face at this point is filled with anger. He gets up from his seat and walks over to me.  He looks down at me.

“You know damn well that a car at twelve o’clock in the morning with no headlights and speeding down a backroad is a disaster waiting to happen. So, take a step back and realize that headlights or not, that crash wasn’t your fault! As for my father, he can’t stay mad at you forever. You cannot let him treat you like that, and I hope you stand up to him. Respectfully, that is. Don’t disrespect my dad.” He is stern in his response. 

He keeps his gaze on me, eyes filled with sympathy. An awkward pause washes over us as he hesitates to continue talking. 

“I’d give you a hug right now, but ya know…”

He looks down at his hands and gazes back up at me. We both awkwardly begin to chuckle. The red in my face flushes away as I wipe a tear from under my eye. It lands in the cold tea rippling the surface. He looks at the clock tower off in the distance.

“I think I should get going now!” He exclaims

I nod my head, “Yeah, I agree. It was nice talking to you!”

I look down at the ground as I try to keep my composure. I look back up to meet his eyes, but I am greeted with the building across the street. The chair is cold as I sit back down and look up at the sky. Dwelling on his words for a while, I think about what he said. The sky opens up as the sun shines down on the table.

“I’ve always believed everything happens for a reason, maybe that happened for a reason too, that reason may not be so clear right now, but it is there nonetheless”