Seoul

-         I got all sorts of problems with my lover, and I think I need another  boyfriend

-         Another problem ? – Kim asked me, looking deeply to all my

-         Now, Sandy , tell me : would you like to go to my country  and maybe have some fresh air?

-         To Korea, Kim?

-         Yeap.

At first I did not know what to say, as I thought that was not the solution for my lack of lu k with the opposite sex.

I started to remember the previous ones : all of them were demanding because all of them asked me things I could not give, like sex  only, or  distant relations that never meant to work.

 As a student, I was broke, and I did not want to disturb her family routine, nor  her ordinary life.

But the truth is that the idea was really awesome, and so much that made me dream about a new place to develop a new life.

However, what about my studies and my family ?

Was I supposed to leave my  friends behind?

My life ?

Was I scaping from my feelings regarding the ex ?

Should I really accept the invitation ?  - was the most disturbing question for me.

I wanted to accept, nevertheless, I wanted to rejecting order not to loose the people and things I had in here.

Unable to find a solution for that wandering thoughts, I decided to  give the responsibility  for the decision to be taken in the hands of  my parents.

-         Let them choose the best problem solving, so I will be free of any charges – I daresay, nonetheless the glorious dreams about staying up till late at night in the companionship of lights and the addictive city smell.

-         Remember my dear, that  this is a chance. You take it or not , Sandy – Kim have said that to me – and I am sure you will  repaginate your life – that was another truth, even though it could not resist a negative answer from my parents.

I did not have the power  to reach my dreams.

So, I  asked for permission from my parents, explaining all details like duration of the trip, connections.

-         How much is that ? – was the first question my dad asked me, really upset about the money he would have to spend

-         It is free – I answered with my winner voice.

-         Free? Is your friend rich ? Because I cannot afford to pay a  trip  like that – tumbling down the castle of hope I have built despite my foolish dreams

-         Don’t worry, dad, she is going to buy the tickets for her family, and there is a promotion that if you buy ten tickets, the eleventh is free, and the eleventh is mine.

-         Does her family have ten members ?

-         Yes. It is a big family, because their brothers and sisters have different mothers .

-         I see.

-         So, you better get all your baggage ready.

That was the turning point.

Two days after, I was in the airport, saying goodbye to all my folks.

The flight lasted more than  seventeen  hours. So tiring !

Besides the fact that there were no toilet paper un the bathroom.

( luckily, my mother put  a roll if it in my hand luggage, so she literally saved me and two other Kim's brothers that ate oatmeal before the departure…..).

-         And the window seat ? – asked the younger sister, a skinny girl wearing a Pikachu hat.

-         Kai bai po. – it was the Korean version for the popular even or odd game.

But I think I could not understand it very well, as it has more hand and fingers movements and more possibilities to make it.

-         Boys against girls – one of them suggested, what made  mother open her eyes and ears.

-         No! – she shouted -  you better behave kids. Or you are going to be punished for misbehaving.

No one listened to her, as they kept laughing, shouting, singing, joking and so on.

Anyway, the thing is that after the mess  all nine guyswere doing, bothered the pilot.of the plane, for sure, as it started to pirouette, speeding on and on.

-         Does the plane have some mechanical issues ? – shaking his knees, father asked the waitress, passing by.

-         No, is only the wind.

-         I see – still shaking his knee – hectic.

The boys and girls were still talking, listening to music, joking.

At dinner time, we had some delicious fish cakes and spicy cabbage, called kimchee.

-         So hot ! – I exclaimed , and Kim – who was sitting in front of me, gave me a bottle of water by stretching her arms.

-         How is it going ? – she asked me, smiling,  as she enjoyed the food.

All seventeen hours through I saw only one of the boys fall asleep,  the baby brother, eight months old.

 So, we landed, after two meals and no sleep at all.

-         At the stairs of the airplane, I could feel a different breeze ; hot and humid, it brought the sea smell to my hair.

After taking our luggage, I could see the modernity alive in television screens all over the subway station, walls, in a fight for calling the attention of every passenger and every guest.

I saw many outdoors and lighting sculptures of hands in the middle of the squares.

No garbage on the streets that were totally clean.

And authomatized transparent elevators, where you could see everything.

In hoing to the hanok, or the typical korean house where we were going to be lodged, we passed by some buildings, with modern architecture   like flying saucers

-         Beautiful ! – I exclaimed , taking pictures from every corner we passed through.

I don’t know where exactly we were at.

But I was so delighted with the city, that I think  I fell in love with   this   city.

After taking our stuff to the hanok,  kin asked ,:

Would you prefer to rest a little or go out to see the nightlife?

I did not even think about the answer :

-         Nightlife! – was the obvious answer.

So I dressed myself , and took some cash my mother gave me.

My intention was to invite some food to kim

But we went to a place that there were too many boys and girls, about my twenty something  years of

 age.

 That was the first shock: I could not understand a word of what they were saying.

-         Don’t worry, dear, j will translate for you.

-         - thank you.

-         How do you like up to this moment ?

-         I think I am completely in live with your country.

-         J am not talking about the country. I M talking about the boys I here.

-         In! The boys…yes, there are many interesting faces…

-         Go ahead. You can use all your expertise, as almost all the guys are looking at you.

You don’t look like natives.

Yes. That’s true – I answered, focusing my eyes on guy, standing by a glowing bridge near the river that crossed the city, named Han.

He was there.

Engaged or not, I will talk to him., as he is tall,   almond shaped   eyes, straight hair that drained over his forehead to mold his fleshy lips like sin. Thin legs. Proportional trunk. Open shirt button. Yes Yes Yes. Interesting-Marita said still trembling to see him so close to her, a god! In her opinion.

  On judging by his outfit, he  must be a  doctor!

 – I said to Kim, pointing him with my head.

But I do not know a single word in korean…

-         That’s not a problem.

Say, “ saranghae"

-         What does it mean ?

-         -  hi, hello - she lied to me, just for fun.

So, I repeated that word to him, who seemed to be alone

-         Right – so I  stood up and smiled at him, repeating

Saranghae.

He immediately looked at me, grabbed my hand and asked me :

-         Are you virgin ? – in english, my native language

I slapped him, because I thought he was taking me for an easy girl.

After that, he disappeared, in the middle of the night.

 I went back to the table,  seeing  Kim   already busy with a guy, speaking in korean.

-         I will not interrupt her – I decided.

So, I just fooled around , and saw the night people, always smiling, walking in pairs or groups of four people, talking, smiling, smiling, and smiling.

As a vppymachine, I started to smile too, that worked as a therapy for me, because I could smile without thinking in my ex, or the family and friends I have left behind.

That smile tought me how to erase bad feelings from my heart, by just smiling, one of the easiest but forgetful things in life..

With that mind change, I saw that I did not need excuses to be happy,

He was there, under a lamppost.

-         Fine. I am alone, and gave nothing to loose. Thar is a person I can talk with – I said, without any further expectations.

Ai, ai, ai, I'm clumsy- and  I  greeted him offering  my  hand as  a  customary practice in the West,

-         My name us Sandy, I am from America and I want to make friends .

-          Park-, to which he looked at his hand and after a second he realized that he should also shake his hand, which he did not use to do in his land.

-         It’s s pleasure

-         . Nice to meet you - I couldn't articulate the words either.

-          Do you speak my language?

-          Of course! I worked in the embassy of my country in America.

-         Oh! That is really nice !

-         How did you like America? – what ? Talking again about my roots!

-         I loved it, I lived in New York

For about six months and I think it us the most fascinating place on Earth.

-         I am from new York too, such a coincidence

-         Yeap !  Where do you live ?

-         In Manhattan. .

-         I see I visited this place , if is just awesome with all that skyscrapers, the rush hour and the happy hour that I have spent there, I will never forget.

-         J see.

-         So, what are you doing here?

-         J came with a friend, who us busy eight now and I decided to take a little stroll.

I saw you , and decided to talk.

And now  I see that you speak  English  very well, where you learned to speak Spanish- ask, without much matter to talk to a stranger but handsome, also, “so nice… ..”

-          I learn on trips.

-          I see

-          Just arrived?

-         Yes. Your parents, that is, your adoptive parents gave me your address.

-          Well- and he looked at me like someone who wanted to undress me. That made me a little nervous.

-          OKAY. How many days  are you going to stay?

-         A month maybe

-         Could I invite you a drink ?

-         Sure.

So, we went to a bar, where they were serving beer in American way.

And we spent the whole night talking about ourselves, our experiences, and our fears.

-         I can be happy anyway . I have no fears, he said 

And I think we have to live life as it comes to you.

With the hood or the bad.

So, you can live without regrets.

Easy, effortless, and ecologically correct.

We laughed.

-         That was weird, , but that observation about happiness is similar to mine, with simple things, those things that fill the soul with happiness - that kind of happiness that does you good, even if it is fleeting like its same little ones.

That, was the new life I wanted my whole life, in a place which  modern architecture simply baffled me, and   so many lime lights that filled my heart with light that dlowed through my veins and through my perception with a  replenishing  sensation  filling   my  body and soul..

I think we spent the whole fourteen days of our vacation with him – and ashamed enough to  repeat that word again.

-         I guess there is something wrong in here).

-          So, we met every single day.

-         Talked.

-         Laughed together.

-         J  was at easy beside him, and  got used to him, I confess, but the time to say goodbye was there,  

So the love I was feeling at the beginning.

First, the handsome man hugged me with a certain care, almost guilt, and then I could no longer resist the temptation, he kissed my mouth, my neck, my breasts - now discovered by his daring hands, the ones that touched all caressing every inch of her body, feeling the heat and passion take over the moment, in silence.

 When the handsome man realized what he was doing, he quickly composed himself, apologizing to me.

 The relationship, now, was sealed.

 Now I could say that it was complete, I no longer needed to sit in the square to show off wisdom or knowledge that they were the only weapons she had to hide the loneliness and abandonment of her that her life had imposed on him.

 She no longer had reasons to defend myself from others or herself,.

 It was thus that I realized that the perspective of things changed profoundly.

 Would I change? Could I change my behavior? Or had he already changed it without realizing it?

 I did not know, I did not know it.

 I didn't care either.