"LIFE IS MISCOMUNNICATED"

My most embarrassing moment as a young adult was my freshman year at Appalchian State University. The distance between myself and my parents was 506.8 miles. This Thanksgiving holiday it was mutually agreed that we would communicate by Skype. I had told my girlfriend that I was going into our bedroom to speak privately with my mother. When I left our living room, Aimee was on the couch, watching a chick flick, "The Notebook".

Skype is a computer program that allows you to make free voice and video calls between two computers, tablets, or smartphones that have Internet connections. Skype makes it easy to stay in touch. In this way you can have an audio call and a video call. Our conversation began, in the background there was laughter and the common commotion of about fifteen family members. In New York, the city that is always awake, and the festivities were winding down.

"Hello, son." "Hi, Mom, how is everybody?" "As you can hear everyone is relaxing and having fun". "Are you at Bryan's today?" "Yes,"I answered. Bryan had been my friend since the first day of high school. We continued to converse a few more minutes, as I watched two year old Caleb throw himself on the floor, screaming; "No, No, No, " needing a nap. Cousin Marti waved and said "Hi, Jamey," to me. She walked out of view carrying a thrashing toddler somewhere for his naptime.

Mom gushing with excitement announced, 'Jamey, guess who just came in?" Before, I could answer I saw my longtime girlfriend back home, Josie appear in front of the tablet screen. We exchanged greetings before the moments of total silence. Mom asked me again, "Jamey, are you at your friend Brian's?" "Yes, Mom, I quickly replied, "Son, don't lie to me." Mom and Josie weren't the only folks surprised, I glanced behind me. Aimee stood in full view behind me, wearing the brown timberline tee shirt, Mom had purchased for my birthday last week. From behind my chair, Aimee hugged me, leaning over for a kiss.

"So, this is why your grades are so poor," Mom responded. I was speechless, my eyes glued to my beautiful, funny, kind-hearted girlfriend of two years., Josie. The company at my parents high rise condominium began to disperse as it became apparent that our conversation was troubled. I closed my computerized tablet ending our miscommunication. Our spoken words did not match our body language and gestures. Surprises by each participant revealed the truth in visual communication.

Moving forward, I worked with a local realty company and continued college classes. This embarrassing communication prompted to stop relying on my parents for my college education. It was time to live my own life. There was nothing worthwhile in being a people pleaser. Aimee and I worked hard, completed our professional degrees. We live freely in North Carolina, owning our home and raising a family. It is a relief to be true to yourself and honest in living among others.

Maturity is a measure of using good judgment, understanding cause and effect, being able to associate what you are doing now with the results of your actions later, and other thought processes that go along with reasonable and acceptable behavior. Cognitive maturity indicates an awareness of that there may be multiple potential perspectives on any given situation, problem, proposal or issue. A person who strongly manifests cognitive maturity endeavors to take this into consideration when making important decisions. Social maturity involves learning to properly relate to acquaintances, family, neighbors, friends, and intimate relationships. It involves understanding how to honor and respect authority.

Developing new habits is hard, especially when it is possible to change your behaviors. The next time, you have an interaction with a friend, a classmate, or an adult pay attention to your words, behaviors, and actions. Notice if you're interrupting someone all the time, speaking your mind without regard to other's feelings, or placing blame on others. Once you identify the ways you want to improve, set goals, and make changes in your everyday interactions.

An uncomfortable sense of foreboding settled at the dining room table, my parents were processing the announcement. My father congratulated us while my mother rushed to the nearest bedroom slamming the door. My mother's allegiance remained with Josie from then to now. That life changing news was our marriage in a civil ceremony at the courthouse. This choice avoided my parents not attending a wedding we would have planned. My father would always submit to my mother's wishes.

When our first child was born, Aimee's parents and younger sister joined us at the hospital to welcome his birth, Alexander James. My dad smiled holding his first grandchild. My younger sister sent congratulations by my father, her loyalty unquestioned. I understood, there was no peace, my mother obstinately held on to her demanding nature. Years swiftly passed us by, we as a whole not only survived, but thrived. Anniversaries, birthdays, and holiday celebrations spent with friends and loved ones. Being there to listen, when loss and sorrow came into our lives.

Dad"s retirement made quite an impact on his life. In the supply company where Dad worked corporate directive determined that at sixty-five years of age retirement was mandatory. Dad had a passion for his job, although on his last day he dozed at his desk. His boss and long time friend Phil invited him to dinner. His wife Leslie prepared Dad's favorite dinner, lasagna with salad and a coconut cake for a birthday cake. Boss Phil thought it would take away some of the sting for the job loss to happen in this manner.

At dinner that evening, Dad laughed jokingly with Phil and Leslie playing cards and listening to jazz music. Phil knew how much Dad cared about his work especially since Mom died unexpectedly, two years earlier. Fortunately, Mom and I patched up our differences when our youngest child was three and Aimee faced extensive time in and out of the hospital battling ovarian cancer. Mom developed a relationship with Aimee, admiring her daughter- in - law's courage and strength. Together arm in arm they participated in a walk-a-thon for cancer survivors.

The following day Dad went to the office as usual, Vivian his secretary commented on from now on days would be filled with rest and relaxation. With a puzzled look on his face, Dad asked what was she talking about. She wished him a happy retirement. Anxious Dad stepped out of his office, down the hall, then out on the busy street.

Vivian apologized profusely for the miscommunication unaware Dad hadn't known about the retirement orders Phil must issue. Phil and another co-worker went to Dad's home, our home, and even drove to the cabin Dad liked to go fish on vacations. Phil and the co-worker found Dad there at the cabin, apologises given for the way the retirement news was handled. Phil called the workplace, at home, and our home to relay Dad's whereabouts. Homecoming would be tomorrow, planning for the future.

At the present time, Dad is currently living on the lake with his new wife. As a couple they enjoy hiking, going to the theatre, and most recently taking dancing lessons. The weeks for the sweethearts are filled with cooking together, discovering new places: exploring nature and spelunking in caves like Otter Creek in Kentucky. Spelunking is the exploration of caves with curiosity, especially as a hobby. On a map they placed push pins, determining where they would travel to next. Enthusiasm, a head lamp, and a good sturdy pair of shoes is all that is required. Sometimes a person must duck under water and back up and out again, best to travel in a group of people more fun too. Mammoth Cave is in Kentucky. Appalachian Caverns are in Tennessee. It is documented 45,000 caves in Tennessee alone. Luray Caverns in Virginia. Plans are in the early stages to visit Surprise Cave in Halong Bay in Vietnam. Surprise Cave was discovered in 1901. It is believed that the Viet Cong used it as a hideout location in the time of the Vietnam War. No doubt that they could find a lot of places to conceal themselves. Surprise Cave is well worth visiting became of magnificent rock formations and sparkling illumination.

Finally, my sister found her one true love. As a school teacher, she worked in close proximity to the baseball coach from the elementary school. She is an English teacher and her students are well aware of the fondness she has towards the Romantic literature

I Love You

I never really knew you.

You were just another friend

But when I got to know you.

I let my heart unbend.

I couldn't help past memories

That would only make me cry.

I had to forget my first love.

And give another try.

So I've fallen in love with you.

And I'll never let you go.

I love you more than anyone.

I just had to let you know.

My feelings for you will never change.

Just know my feelings are true.

Just remember this one thing.

I will always love you.

Two boys on his ball team, cutout a blooming rose from construction paper, using colored markers. One of the boys wrote legibly the poem by Dave Lawrie's online. My sister was in her classroom, when she read the love note on her desk. She ran outside onto the ball field, threw her arms around him and kissed him. In front of ball players and spectators the miscommunication occurred. The man who was to be my future brother-in -law began their courtship, marriage soon followed. It is not known if the baseball coach scolded the boys or not.