10 reasons my sisters were surprised by my rejection of Sewing Machines

Okay, so here's the thing, I don't know if I have any routines that would be considered in any fashion reasonable not to assume of me given my tendencies, especially from people who know me personally. 

I'm moody, I'm easily upset, and frankly mechanisms of most forms make me angry very easily. I've also never owned a sewing machine that didn't crave death upon my touch. Other women "turn men gay", I murder sewing machines.(I know that my serger would still work but that girl is idiot-proof & I like to work so much dumber than that) 

If it's any surprise, this is the only habit of mine that seemed to truly surprise anyone in my close circle. My mom just pointed at every time I macramed all over her dining chairs and pointed out that I'm a wrathful bitch when my machines bust my fabric anyway.(she didn't put it that way, but I know who I am)

I just pointed out the previous usually and denounce machines like some kinda half-luddite. Anyway, these kinds of things are usually an experiment in understanding the "why?" Of people's misunderstanding and I guess I can go down the list on the "why's" that makes sense.

10. Comfort - Is the most common argument for most of the machines I don't use, a Mr.Coffee like mom had set up to turn on at 10 o'clock every morning makes up the difference for a working person's day. And it's fundamentally familiar in its make and function for most people, yes it's convenient, but it's also comfortable in the way most things are if you're habituated from childhood in the use of them. Even things like upkeep, and failures become second nature which is fair. It's not comfy to get sore fingers 'cause you're bad at using thimbles, or from pricking your fingers, those are actual bad habits of mine. It's also terrifying to bruise your thumb 'cause your needle wanted to punch straight through it, this is unlikely to happen by hand even if your using a 6 inch tapestry needle, which I'd argue is rather comforting for a hobbyist. 

But in my case, before all that is the fact that it was the first form of sewing I was introduced to. My aunt taught me two stitches, the blanket and running stitches, later my sister would try to teach me the herringbone or hemstitch, but my personal traction as you'll see is backstitch and whipstitch. 

9. Convenience - Is by far the least of the arguments my sister's or anyone would make in regards to things like pour-through coffee-pots or getting completely handsy with the darts in a shirt. Like, it's clear, sound and personal, and I don't begrudge anyone their perception of convenience, I'm sure it's very convenient to keep an entire other person in your life just to whack your weeds, but convenience is absolutely dependent on the person and saying otherwise is neglecting what a feed-dog can do to lace. 

As someone who's lived in more than one nowhere I'd like to point out that the necessary implements of a sewing kit can be narrowed down to a needle you haven't broken yet, thread, nail clippers & spit. This was actually my sewing kit for most of my life if I were honest, and it ought not be a dismissed factor in all the arguments going forwards. 

8. The Learning curve - This is something that might surprise some, but I'm kinda bad at machines, I don't actually like futzing with non-static "idiot-proof" objects. Certainly I had control, and there were some things that were partial to instinct even by machine, but there was always a gap in rather important features. For one, the allowances were never "perfect"; this is one of those things that's regularly dismissed when sewing big Ad-squares 'cause stretch is enough to account for most issues, but on the smaller scale with anxiety and such, it made everything harder to do. 

In my sister's view, in their own homes with much more to do, the regular issues I had working with my machine didn't quite matter. That might seem harsh, but they really couldn't care more about that and get anything else done given how much of an open nerve it was for me. 

And in their view, none of it was particularly interesting or important to do well. I'm a hobbyist, I shouldn't be having a fit whenever things like this didn't work. Which fine, but it still wasn't working.

7. Quick - This is also a solid argument given certain priorities, and it is the primary reason most people who choose to sew at all go in by machine. The fact is that a machine is rarely slower than a person going at a tailors pace, but I have experienced that "rarely", my main issue with machines was that mechanism failure rarely got fixed on any reasonable kind of timescale. I'd get through one seam on one project and my machine would crap out only to go unusable for up to a month 'cause I wasn't of a mind to bother without falling into a rage, and my sister would come over to "fix it" only for the tension to fall out in less than a week if I actually used the dang thing. 

This is just "a normal part of keeping a machine" but my hands don't have this problem, me upkeeping my body and space is more than enough to make my projects go by quickly immediately after I make up my mind about it. 

I'd say something similar about coffee but that brings me to the larger issue, that being, My first machine died. 

6. Income or Hobby - Is probably not what you'd place as this number, but it is actually primary in my case, as Lemons are easier bought at Joanns or Walmart than at industrial warehouses. There are really common tension issues in modern home machines that are not only rarer in industrial machines, but are more easily handled in them. 

Being as I've only ever been quite squarely in the hobbyist category, and not a lot of these machine issues aren't underpinned by this gap, I had basically only issues. 

My sisters work in their day to day life with industrial one-stitch Juki's, which means their troubleshooting skills, a toad in the hole for in their field, were completely untranslatable by the time I was using a machine. 

While they've needed and primarily used their sewing for labor, as a market skill which only really has value modernly if it can be done quickly, they've had real presure to make use of machines, but also machines that could be used that way with little trouble.

The same could be said of other mechanical conveniences in their lives, coffee isn't something they make money from but its feature as a stimulant, and not simply or always a leisure makes a machine much more convenient even in failure than a Drip funnel, even if the upkeep asides from cloggable pipes is identical in that case, a machine with a timer feature that can start chugging before you get up makes much more sense for their lives. 

But it doesn't change the inherent sense of judgment in me saying so, especially when my sisters and I have such very different ideas about money and hobbyism. I got a new machine(a drop bobbin!), but it didn't live long.

5. Quality and Qualities - This one is actually a point of praise I get a lot from my sisters, even before getting particularly into the grit about why. It's also a point that people assume always goes to machines(which it does for pleather/vinyl, though it's still second place to the right glue), but ultimately under perfect circumstances is a split ticket. A machine in good condition that isn't being manned by me, serves a perfectly serviceable stitch, even straight on stretch is a perfectly fine option. 

But the thing about handwork is that it is more work, and it's something easily argued against when time is money. But it's also an easier fallback when the alternative is falling into a depressive state or watching materials you're limited to get torn up and wasted by feed-dogs, and missed stitches or just all together fall apart 'cause the tension fell out again. 

4 My machines kept dying, and my sister's kept buying - And you're probably asking "Why Not Just Learn? Idiot." or Correction, why don't you just learn upkeep? If you're trying not to be a heinous bitch, but here's the thing, I'd learned everything there was to know about fixing every problem in a machine except the problem I had.

3. The Pleasure Gap - Is something that you probably don't think matters in the decision to do a specific craft, but there's a reason it's number 3 for me. When it became obvious that I didn't possess the skills to upkeep the low quality machines available to me, and that my stop gap routine of handwork was directing my skills more and more often, I started actually being able to prioritize what made me happy about the craft overall.

I could've made it work for a time, I kinda did sometimes, but that didn't leave me with the qualities I wanted. I wanted garments that were pretty on the inside, I wanted stitches that didn't feel terrifying in thin materials, or haphazard in thick. 

It's also the thing that makes the least amount of sense on the hobby level with my sisters, and while I could assign developmental or childhood differences, which I'd argue are considerable, the basic gap in pleasure goals is probably the larger portion of it.

My sisters have a different subset of sewing skills, and a different set of ideals when it comes to their work. Finished is together, it's usable, it's well-salable. And honestly, it leads to a fuckton of finished work, of things that they've done quickly that I'd be stuck in development hell over.

But there are things that I quite simply prefer by hand, I like keeping tension with every method available, I like working a material without losing the bobbin-thread, and I like as per my anxiety, working every stitch for hours. I'm serious here, the utter control I feel over my materials is kinda fantastic, and it's kinda the reason it works so well in my case. But it's just not worth it if you don't feel some kinda "that" way about it.

2. A Provider's Ego - This was actually one of the things that I know bothered them the most, honestly, even mom didn't like that I was opting out of sewing machines all that much the first time I brought it up, but she was aware the first time I brought it up. I'd brought it up, the gaps in upkeep, and my learning how to sew properly enough for garments that fixing or making up for my machine's sometimes wonky stitches was possible. But then I kept having trouble, and I let go of my last home sewing machine, and then I started making things slowly by hand and actually finishing them. 

But it was over a year before my sister learned that I'd given up on machines, or that we'd trashed my last one. And I'm pretty sure she only learned at all 'cause I asked for help with drafting a block, and instead of breaking out a machine I no longer owned, I just ran the thing together point to point. I remember being praised in the moment for the skill, but I know she was hurt assuming that I'd not gone to her when it was still a problem. 

That she'd have the money, or that the money would make the difference given the limits of my person.

1. But Why the heck would anyone choose to do these things that way anyway?

Yeah, that's the final question. Honestly, the gap between two people is never larger than the most basic question "why would anyone do anything I wouldn't do?" and honestly, I don't get it either. Except as the odd one out, I do. I know a lot more about their reasons and preferences mostly 'cause I've had the need to explain my own.

As far as needs and preferences, they've got the more common view, but it doesn't change my needs as an individual or how I need to accommodate them in order to be happy, it just means that most people don't get it without the explanation. 

To put it simply, I don't think it's so awful to explain myself, but I feel like sometimes the gap in behavior ends up needing more 'Cause of who we are.