Room of insecurities

I just woke up in my bed and saw a door exactly in front of me. Wait, but this is my bedroom! And it never had any door except the one that connects it to the hallway. It looked like someone constructed a guest room overnight. I was curious to see what was inside. I got up and reached the door to open it.

When I went inside, I saw that it didn't look like a new room at all. "Where am I? This is strange. Hello...anybody here..?" I looked around, there was no one over there. I immediately tried to unlock the door but couldn't. After all, how was l supposed to open the door that wasn't there at all! There can't be a door to an imaginary room. Yes, it was a dream. The door was gone. I thought I was trapped in there. I turned towards the room. It wasn't really big but there were very few things placed at the corners that made it look vacant. The old furniture and dim lights gave it a rustic look.

In one corner there was a pile of clothes, I walked towards it, took one of the clothes in my hands, and realised that they were all mine. They were all oversized clothes which I used to wear when I was fat. But how did they come here? I had thrown them away. Just when I was thinking about the clothes, I smelled something, something so good that my stomach started growling. There was a table at the center of the room, a round table full of plates. I rushed towards it and observed all the plates placed on it, they were full of sweets and namkeen that I love. "Wow, this is a feast! So tempting but how could I eat this? I'm on this never-ending diet and everything here is what I'm not supposed to eat!" I told myself to gather all the strength and stepped away from the table. But I was starving. I felt like I could eat a horse. "I know I'm going to regret this but I'll regret it even more if I don't eat this. Anyway, I'm ready for the consequences." I grabbed a chair and started gobbling up the food. Everything was delicious. The sweets were literally melting in my mouth and the namkeen was perfectly flavored. Both were complementing each other. In no time my stomach was full, and I felt contented. My tummy wasn't flattened anymore. There was a bump due to the junk food that I ate.

Across the table, there was a mirror slanting on the wall. I stood in front of it. It was just like the Mirror of Erised from Hogwarts. In that mirror, I was looking fat like old times. My face was full of acne and acne marks. I got scared and started trembling. I touched my face but there was nothing, I touched my body but it wasn't fat like the mirror showed. The mirror was magical, it was showing my past. The past from which I had run away. I couldn't stand there, I stepped aside.

In the other corner, there was a side table. And the things on it drew my attention towards it. A strange device having only an on/off switch was connected to the headphones. I put on those headphones and pressed the button on that device. Some random people were talking about a girl as if they were passing comments on her. "She looks like a football", "She is too fat to wear such clothes", "Keep eating like that and you won't get married at all", "You look too old for your age", "You should be eating healthy food to stay in shape", "Oh, forget the body, look at her face that's not pretty", "Boy, she must have to photoshop before posting a picture with that face!", and it went on and on. "It was me! They were all talking about me!", I said to myself while taking off the headphones. My eyes were full of tears, I started walking back and forth anxiously. While walking, I noticed that the table with food on it had vanished.

But that was not just it. I was startled by the sight before me. One-fourth part of the door appeared on the wall. Something inside me just clicked and I realised where I was. It was the room of my insecurities. And by eating the food that I denied for years just to stay in shape, I had won over one of my insecurities. I knew what I had to do. I went to the pile of clothes, picked the purple dress that was used to be my most favorite, and wore it. At first, I thought it will fit loose, but it fitted well. I loved the dress and felt comfortable. As soon as I smiled, the other clothes disappeared and another part of the door appeared making half of the door visible.

Then I walked towards the mirror. I saw myself in that purple dress and it just changed my mood. I was happy, I knew it suited me well, and felt confident. Whether I looked fat or thin, my skin was clear or not, didn't mattered anymore. I smiled and admired myself and the mirror was gone. Yes, it was working, three-fourth of the door was visible now. The last thing was there to get rid of, the headphones. I wore the headphones, turned on the button, and before anybody could speak, I started speaking in the microphone, "I am strong, I am wise, and I am beautiful in my own way. That's all that matters." There were no voices. I took off the headphones, kept them on the table. Within seconds, it all vanished, and then the remaining part of the door appeared.

I had done it. I had overcome all my insecurities. I opened the door and went back to my bedroom. It was a relief. The door had disappeared. And I knew it had disappeared forever. I had fought my battles and fought them well. When I blinked and opened my eyes, I was in my bed. It was a wonderful dream and I woke up to be a completely different person. What I saw in that dream were the things that I had buried deep down in my heart. Now, they were all gone. It was a splendid morning.