Bush School Beatnik

Bush School Beatnik

“I am so excited!”

“Well I’m not”. Kel Koala complained.

“Aren’t you even a little bit curious?” Jac Roo asked.

“No!”

“It’s the first day Kel. Lots of exciting new things to learn”.

“And how do you know that?” Kel replied sarcastically.

“My mum told me”. Jac replied.

“That wouldn’t be the same mum who came up with the hair brained idea of sending you to school would it?”

“Well!”

“I thought so. The same mum who spoke to my mum and convinced her that it would be a good idea that I joined you. And now here I am wondering how my life took such a drastic turn for the worst”. Kel grumbled.

“Lighten up will you. Mum said we need to get an education so we can expand our horizons”. Jac said cheerfully.

“Your horizon, my horizon and everybody else’s horizon is 4.8 kilometres away. There’s no expanding on that Jac unless of course you are ten metres tall”. Kel said gruffly.

“Well, maybe, but my mum also said that an education will open doors for us in years to come”.

“Take a look around Jac. Can you actually see any doors around here?” Kel continued to grumble. “I just want to be happily resting in the fork of a tree eating eucalyptus leaves and soaking up the sun!”

“Yeh well I would also like to be out under a tree having a morning sleep but you’re not hearing me complain”.

“Not yet anyway”. Kel smirked as a piercing sound split the air around them.

“What is that noise?” He asked placing his paws over his ears.

“I think it means we have to go inside”. Jac explained.

“Iniside!” Kel screamed. “No-one said we had to go in anywhere!”

“I think that’s where the learning takes place Kel”.

“Well I think you better have another thought Jac ‘cos I am not going into that place. It’s dark and there’s others in there. I’m a solitary animal. I hate crowds”.

“Oh for goodness sake Kel how can it hurt? Jac replied semi irritated.

“Do come in”, a friendly voice called from the doorway.

“Go on”. Jac said pushing Kel forward.

“I don’t like this!” Kel whispered through gritted teeth.

All was quiet for the next few hours at Bush School. As soon as the bell rang around noon the animals began filing out.

“That wasn’t so bad was it? Jac asked chirpily.

“Hm! It would have been better if that darn galah hadn’t carried on squawking, interrupting and repeating itself. If I hear ‘who’s a pretty boy’ one more time I swear I’m going to scream.” Kel complained.

“You have to understand some animals are different Kel. It’s about getting on amongst those differences”.

“Well what about those crocs eying me off with wry smiles from the other side of the room. I can’t tell you how glad I am that bell rang as I was sure I was going to be entree for one of them!”

“Come on let’s get to the canteen. I’m starving”. Jac said dragging Kel by the scruff of the neck.

“Great no eucalyptus leaves that I eat. This day couldn’t get any better”. Kel moaned sarcastically.

“You can share my lunch”. Jac offered.

“Thanks but I’m on a strict diet that does not include whatever that is that you are eating”.

Where are you going?” Jac asked as Kel started to walk away.

“Into the bush to find something I can actually eat! “You can’t ‘expand your horizons’ or ‘open doors’ that don’t exist if you die of starvation!”

“I’m coming with you then”. Jac said following him.

“Why?”

“Because if I know you like I do I reckon you won’t come back”.

“Highly likely”. Kel admitted.

After a feed of leaves Kel decided he wanted to climb up the nearest tree to have a sleep.

“You can’t do that”. Jac explained.

“No? Watch me then”. Kel said about to scamper up the nearest tree.

“No you don’t”. Jac ordered as he grabbed Kel by the neck and pulled him back down. We’re in this together and we are due back. Didn’t you hear the bell?”

“Nope! Must have been chewing my leaves and missed it”.

Reluctantly Kel followed Jac back to Bush School and they were greeted by the same friendly voice from the morning.

“If that galah........” Kel began.

“Get in”. Jac muttered under his breath as he pushed Kel forward once again.

The final bell sounded after a few more hours and there was a flurry of bodies as the door swung open, animals all vying for a pole position to the outdoors. Leading the assault was Kel, a croc snapping at his heels.

“Geez I managed to foil being on the lunch menu and nearly became afternoon tea instead. Did you see that?” Kel asked as Jac approached.

“Yeh those guys are out of line. They’ve been complaining all afternoon about the lack of time to digest their lunch. Come on I’ll walk you home”.

And so the first day of bush school had come to an end and the friends chatted about it all the way home.

“Overall how did you find the day Kel?”

“Too long and my back hurts from sitting upright in those seats. Every time I leaned forward the teacher asked me to sit up”.

“Perhaps you could ask for an ergonomic chair”. Jac laughed. “What about what we learned?”

“I learned why farmers shoot galahs”.

“Kel you can’t say that!” Jac berated.

“I just did and anyway who’s around to hear?”

“That’s not the point! You heard what the teacher said. Acceptance Kel. For goodness sake”.

“Okay. What did I learn?” Kel asked himself. “Well ‘a’ is for apple, ‘b’ is for ball and ‘c’ is for cat. ‘D’ is for don’t get me started!!!!!”

“Very funny”.

“Tell me Jac have you seen an apple, a ball or a cat anywhere around where we live?”

“Er, no. Not exactly, but there are those wild cats that roam at night”. Jac responded.

“Wouldn’t that start with ‘w’?” Kel asked mockingly.

As they walked on Jac decided to change the direction of the conversation.

“We’ve got swimming lessons tomorrow”. He offered.

“Oh great! You know koalas don’t swim don’t you Jac?”

“Never thought about it”. Jac admitted.

“I may need to get home and practice my death roll escape techniques”.

“What are you talking about?”

“If those swimming lessons are prior to lunch then the crocs will be out for a free meal. You already know I seemed to be the preferred diet for today and I can’t see much changing tomorrow. Alfresco dining at its best!”  Kel said his eyes widening.

As the friends approached their respective homes they bid each other farewell.

“Bring your lunch tomorrow Kel”. Jac called as Kel approached his tree. As he hopped off he yelled “see you when I come though in the morning. Another day, another lesson”.

Kel waved and as he began climbing he quietly yelled back, “Don’t bother, one day is more than enough for me. I learned lots of lessons today Kel and one is that I’ll be sleeping in tomorrow!”