The Black and White Crow

As you check your mail you notice a letter that makes you stop in your tracks. It’s a letter from a real estate agent.

 Its been a year since your mother died and your father is thinking of selling the house. This house that held a lot of memories to you good and bad and you treasure all of it. You barely had any interactions with your father since the burial of your mother. He had always been busy with his job and you two never had time to check up on each other he never even went to any school activities that you participated in. This year has been hell to you and had no one there beside you, no one to lean on, no one to share what your feeling, and no one to help you. And this sunny Saturday morning you just find a letter that would take the only thing you had left. Your comfort zone and your home.

As you prepare food for dinner knowing that an hour later your father will be home you stopped and your eyes fell on the knife that you used to chop the vegetables a while ago. You heard the chimes that’s displayed in the middle of your living room sing its melody and you looked at it. You watched how the white crow danced to the rhythm of the chime. You knew white crows are so rare but your mother fell in love with this chime that’s why she bought it when she saw it at some old antique shop and said that it represents a soul coming and visiting you. You always find it beautiful whenever that white crow danced it always felt magical. The melody stopped and your eyes once again fell on the knife. You looked at it as it reflected your eyes, those dull and empty eyes of yours.  You don’t know what came to your mind but you slowly reached for the knife by your right hand your fingers shook with fear. The blade dancing with an eerie rhythm as it neared your wrist. Your pale white wrist that’s full of scars from the time you lost control now stay numb as if it would never feel the sharp edge that neared. You’ve made a decision and will not look back. You will leave this wicked world and meet your mother at those white pearly gates that is 'if' you will be qualified enough to step on those holy stones that tolerate no evil vessel. You are evil the world is evil. The decision is final. You will leave this wicked world and leave your father alone to bear the guilt of losing his beloved wife and only child. You will leave this world and leave your classmates the burden of not doing anything when the big girls painted your face with their fists. You will leave this world leaving a curse to your best friend that she will surely carry for more years to come.

You shouldn’t have left the window open since a black crow oily and noisy as usual sat on the sills with his dull eyes staring straight at you with an emotion that no man will ever predict.

“Caw! Caw!” A noise that would surely annoy anyone out of their skin but not you. The odd song from the crow’s beak scared you out of your wits.

“Caw! Caw!” Anyone will hear those repeating words but you heard a phrase that haunted both your mind and soul. “The young bird that left the nest will soon be devoured by a starving wolf.”

The crow looked like a grim reaper that came to take you saying it’s your time. The one that surely scared you is the way those black pearls stared at you, all the way through you like it could see through your eyes. Those eyes look at you as if it's waiting, slowly waiting for you to continue and paint the kitchen with your sweet scarlet blood, waiting for you to die.

That’s when you remembered. You remembered your glory days when your father taught you how to ride a bike, when he carried you to your bedroom, when he tackled both you and your mother, when he helped you with your homework and when he listened to you as you silently prayed every night. You remembered when your classmates praised your artworks when you learned how to have unity and teamwork with, when you all shared jokes, when you all made memories with a big smile plastered on your faces and when they helped you when you couldn’t understand some lessons. You remembered when your crush glanced at you and when he talked to you. You remembered when your best friend gave you advice when you both played your favorite games together when you both had your sleepovers and had long night talks, when she consoled you and when she wiped those tears from your eyes. All this came to you and you felt how your cheeks were now wet with your tears. Your tears continued to roll down not stopping until you could feel your chest is blocked. It felt heavy as it tightens, you let out a cry and it felt good to let it all out. All the hurt, sadness, and loneliness that you have kept to yourself for a whole year you let it all out as you cried so hard letting go of the knife and clutching your chest. You cried so hard for the first time since your mother’s death. You cried yet you know that deep inside you felt good. It felt good to let go of all those toxicities that you kept to yourself for so long that it chained you and hind you from the world. After almost ten minutes of crying and relieving yourself, you smiled to yourself and chuckled. You looked at the sill only to see the crow is still there. Looking at you with its emotionless eyes but you knew now. He wasn’t like a grim reaper he was your silent call. The one who came not to take you but to let you live, live, and continue facing your problems. You smiled again and bit your lips before saying a silent thank you and as if knowing that its job is done it flew into the sky.

“Caw! Caw! Caw! Caw! Caw!” Annoying it may sound to others but for you can hear that it is singing as if celebrating his success on his job. You watched it flew only to see a white crow flying with it both singing their own song. As they flew together a soft gush of wind came through the window and kissed you before you once again heard the chimes lovely melody being played. You stared at the two birds as they flew away into the vast blue sky. “Thank you, mom.” You silently whispered knowing that your words were heard. You looked at the knife again and held it before continuing to prepare food for dinner.

You and your father both sat silently while eating your dinner. “Are you planning on selling the house dad?” you asked starting the conversation.

Your father stopped eating and set his utensils down before answering.

“No honey. I could never do that. At first, I was planning to because it hurt seeing this house it felt empty when your mom wasn’t here with us, but I just couldn’t. This house held a lot of our memories together.”

“That’s good then because even though it's just the two of us dad I know mom is still with us. She will forever be here with us here,” and you pointed to your head “and here.” Then pointing to your heart.

Your father stood up, came before you, and kneeled in front of you before hugging you. You felt his tears slowly soaking your shoulders. You also felt your tears welling up again before it fell one by one.

“I’m so sorry dear. I’m so sorry.” Was all he could say.

“Its okay dad. It's okay. We’re good.” You answered knowing that he knew his mistake and he really feels sorry and you knew from now on things will change for the better.

You took your father's head and held his face before wiping his tears. You showed him your smile and while looking at your father the chimes melody came. You and your father both looked at the chime as the white crow danced. “Dad I think we should look for a chime to pair with that.” You told your father as you both watched the chimes. “A black crow this time.” You said again. “Why not white. It’s a white crow after all.” Your father answered before looking at you. “Because it looks good. A black crow and white crow together. Black and white they’re different but fit each other. Not the same colors but its balanced don’t you think?” you answered and your father smiled at you understanding your point. That night for the first time since your mother’s death your father carried you to your bed and told you stories. You both caught up with each other and it all made you feel like your back to normal again. And that night he listened to you as you silently prayed just like how he used to. Just like how he used to.